Comment on 007: Heaven by iDance
Sorry it took me so long to reply. You're welcome. As far as improvement, it's nothing major. It's just that the second to last paragraph strikes me as ever so slightly "canned" or "cliché." Also, in the last paragraph "...their staring at him..." is a little awkward.
But really, it doesn't need changing if you don't want. I am in awe of your pithy glipse into character!
But really, it doesn't need changing if you don't want. I am in awe of your pithy glipse into character!
That's okay, I'm sometimes really late at replying as well, haha.
Yeah, I can see what you mean. Having just 'Their staring' would be better, I think, but then that would mess up the word count.
(Also, that image of Elrond in my head was what inspired this whole thing
)
Thank you for your opinion, I'll definitely take it into account if I ever go back and re-work this.
Thanks very much :3
Yeah, I can see what you mean. Having just 'Their staring' would be better, I think, but then that would mess up the word count.
(Also, that image of Elrond in my head was what inspired this whole thing
)Thank you for your opinion, I'll definitely take it into account if I ever go back and re-work this.
Thanks very much :3