Sort off, I suppose. Yes, lust is natural, and you can do it all you like, but don’t say, in your servantile data. Yes, I do know that woman feel pleasure too, but that does mean one can go around spreading germs (there have been studies that suggest women carry more germs on their hands, if you don’t consider it starting six years ago being history.
Yes, it does. And nice job trying to oppress my opinion and pigeon-holding me. I am neither. How the fuck is that ‘sex trafficking’ anyway? I wouldn’t within ten feet of a prostitute. However, I still feel for those forced in that industry (and not the ‘I needed the money!’ idiots). Yeah, because you anything negative about women’s choice or you ‘misogynistic’/‘sexist’/‘oppressive’, which they insult men and call them rapists and perverts for having a sex drive. Equality means both positive and negative things.
It will to some people. What about physical and biological difference do you not get? Penis, testicles. Penetrator, needs release. Vagina, submissive, receiver, not needed. Anything but ‘liberating’. I’m not going the repeat the ‘choices’ and ‘judgement’ bit again.
I know that. However, our society being so loose with sex, is why it is assumed if you are in a relationship, even unmarried, you must be fucking. And apparently men cannot be uninterested in sex. My boyfriend get that bullshit recently as well. I wouldn’t even french kiss. We do the non-sexual things of romance. And let's not forget the research on sex and STDs, that wastes money that could be going towards more value things such as medicine and cures. And the waste of resources on sex toys, sex shops, and BDSM stuff.
I’m not ‘justifying’ it. It’s not rape as she had nothing to lose, nothing to take, nothing to violate.
*Sigh*, I already mentioned the bullshit that is the ‘Madonna/Whore Complex”. And most things Freud thought was bullshit. It is nothing more than a man (or woman), respecting themselves, women, and the concepts of romance and marriage. That woman made herself an object already. I am not going to speak out the bullshit that is the ‘double standard’ again. Physical. Differences. Seriously, what is so bloody hard to under?
She is no place to judge another’s sexual needs and wants. They are not ‘women’, they are girls.
However, research on sex and STDs are important as people are directly connected and influenced by these Sexual health is interconnected with many important medical fields of research. Research for medicines and cures have already a considerable support relative to political policies among states.
In the case of rape, the matter should be focused on the behaviors or the perpetrator and victim to better analyses the situation in order to punish the perpetrator and help the victim.
You are still redundant, how can you say you don't believe in the Madonna/Whore Complex if you are supporting sexual double standards?
I acknowledge there are sexual differences, but such differences does not declare anyone the uke and seme. that is a social construction.
When I mention "sex Trafficker" it was because these motherfuckers understand how virginity is important in order to sell these girls at higher prices, which puts these motherfuckers to be the worst types of human beings.
If our societies are becoming sexually more active, that's because people no longer have a biased and narrow-minded definition of sex, gender, and sexuality. Is that bad? If wisely used, it's positive for human progress.
I respect people who want to be and/or are asexual, the thing is we have to acknowledge that we live in a complex world and we truly need to analyze as carefully and unbiased as possible moral and ethical issues.
Ack, sorry about the mistakes in that last message. I forgot to look it over.
It’s your own damn fault if you get an STD, just as it would be your own of you became sick eating rotten food, or rare meat or poisonous berries. Deal with it yourself. That money could also be going towards building homes, both at home and in Third World countries as well. Why, a few people, like dear little Sandra Fluke expected the public to pay for contraception. I may not like him, but Rush Limbaugh was very correct in calling her a slut and a prostitute. Oh, and therein lays another misandric standard: that female-only spaces are ok, especially in gyms in case they are ‘ogled’ and ‘objectified’. Oh, the horror! And would it be ok for a lesbian to ogle you? Those men are usually to busy exercising. And again, women are free to ogle men and it's not misandric or sexist.Take the Coke advert with the guy mowing the lawn, for example, and the Cadbury Crisplo one. One woman said it was saying it is was ok to go after a younger woman, that she is being 'objectified' when the girl was clearly going after her boyfriend's dad. And when I told woman that, she basically said 'a young woman can't rape an older man'. Again, sorry to get off topic, but my mind is like that. However, male-only spaces are ‘PRUF DAT TEH PATRIACHY STIL ECISTS!!!!”. Of course, but we should understand that, while the rape is always the perpetrator’s fault, the victim (male or female) is still putting themselves in a vulnerable position, by getting drunk, not watching their drink for example. I am not ‘blaming the victim’, I am just saying that, in a world of equality, everyone takes responsibility to keep themselves or others safe. However, I do also understand that you can be the most responsible person in the world and still have that happen to you. It just reduces your chance of suffering.
*Facepalm* THERE IS NO BLOODY ‘DOUBLE STANDARD’! Sorry, but you’re still being thick in regards to this.
Where the hell do you think seme and uke came from? It is not this ‘social construction’ rubbish? It physically works that way. Unless it is pegging, it is that way. There is nothing wrong with a man wanting a virgin wife. It is not ‘sexist’, ‘misogynistic’, or ‘oppressive’. As I just said, it about a man respecting himself, woman, and romance/marriage. They want a woman who will with them and them alone. They are not trying to ‘control’ women (they are allowed themselves to be controlled by lust and penis). They want that first time to be not-so-good and clumsy, as I read one man saying. I’m sure no one would bat an eyelid a woman (or a man) wanting a virgin husband.
That’s true. However, for me, rapists, animal/child abusers (which I suppose would in include those) and murderers deserve the death penalty. Too bad it was banned decades ago here
It is not ‘narrow’ to respect oneself and their love life. Yes, it is good that homosexuality, asexuality and transgenderism are gradually being more accepted, such ‘freedom’ has also led to more STDs, more money being wasted, and again, general selfishness. This is a little of topic, but: perhaps we can even more on from men in dresses 'trannies' as well, since no cares with a woman wears a suit and tie. I believe it is ridiculous to gender a piece of fabric for its shape. Beside, this is another thing, along with pink and blue, that was the other way around. I keep wondering who it came to swap.
*Sigh* Again, I agree. I am a very political person after all.
Researching about STDs and and other diseases are as important as building homes, it is through these investigations we are able to prevent, cure/treat, and save so many lives. Without such dedication, our humanity would have never being able to advance and progress. There is no sense of building infrastructures if no one will occupy them due to poor health and bad prevention.
Rush Limbaugh is only correct when it comes to the public paying for contraceptives, but he demonstrates to be a misogynist by judging her so quickly. Contraceptives have a medical function, that of regulating menstrual cycles if their bodies do not take care of that. I believe only those kinds of emergency contraceptives should be supported due to their medical reasons
"A younger woman cannot rape an older guy", men can be raped too, you know, the effects are different.
It is true that both the victim and victimizer should be held accountable in order to know the truth as much as possible, but Justice has the punish the perpetrator and formulate rational ways, without biases, to avoid these situations. Many countries had very stupid solutions that are always centered on using the victims to avoid looking at the reality of the problem. (In Gorontalo-Indonesia, women cannot wear dresses that show skin, this being influenced by Muslim morale rather than rationality). Did rapes and sexual harassment cases decreased? nope, these actually had a slight increase. That is misogyny, when you put the blame on women only. These people failed on recognizing that the perpetrators were a huge part of the problem and at fault of this is by believing in the Sexual supremacy of Men.
This is why sexual equality is important and vital, it helps both genders to understand none cannot overpower the other
Social constructions are rubbish and useless, more based on fictitious expectations rather than factual reason
It is not ethical if a "sexually experienced" man requires his future wife to be a "virgin", unless the girl accepts. that is not what equality is about, it is not fair, but like I said again, if the girl accepts him, that's her deal. If we are in such a context, then it is fair and reasonable for "Sexually-Experienced" women to marry a "Virgin" boy, just as both "Virgins" and Sexually-experienced" individuals can do so, there is no ethical and moral problem.
I don't support Death Penalties because we are letting these bastards to have an easy escape, I want them to suffer hell in earth first, to have the punishment fit the crime.
I agree it is not "narrow" to respect your love life, but it depends on the substance within the flask.
No, it's not. You chose to risk an STD or not. You can’t control how and where you were born. We advantaged perfectly fine in other areas. Oh, I’m guessing your referring to the HIV/AIDs dangers?I had forgotten of that.
Oh, no, how dare a man criticize an all mighty-vagina owner. Yet again, woman are allowed to insult men sexually and grope all they like. She clearly is a slut if she’s having such sex she can afford the contraception. And paying someone pay for your sex sessions is prostitution. You are paying someone to have sex.
No, no, no. I was telling what the other person, though I will refrain from mentioning her name. I believe that anyone can anyone of any gender, orientation or age.
Indeed. As people say “don’t teach a woman to not get raped. Teach a man not rape’. However in itself is sexist/a little homophobic, as it assumes all victims are female and all attackers male. Men make up a fair amount of rape victims, near half in some places, but it seems so low that because most men are afraid to report it, and they will always be ridiculed. However, if one is wearing clothing meant to display the body in a sexual manner, and if she is so ‘confident in your body’, then you have no right to complain or call men rapists/perverts/pigs for having a sex drive. And again, they are allowed to fawn and giggle over men’s muscles, and butts, and whatnot. It is not‘misogynistic’ , it is ‘sexist’. Misogynistic is the hatred of women. Even if it is sexual, the person say things like that is just saying what they think will keep people more safe, as misguided the attitude is. The intention is good, but the method not. The thing about dresses is bloody ridiculous. Unless someone had some kind of fetish, who is going to be turned on by naked arms or legs?
Well, I’m sorry, but I can’t see heterosexual intercourse any other way. However, I do believe it can a romantic thing. I truly do, but it is also a great commitment for someone. The same goes for same-sex relationship of course.
I’m not explaining it again.
I used to think like that, but do you not dislike the fact that your tax money is keeping them alive? Yes, the whole ‘we don’t want to suffer’ is disgusting. What about the people or animals they made suffer. The person who’s body they violated, the person who took an innocent’s life. They need to suffer as much as their victims did, have it etched into their minds before they go to hell. Yes, there has sadly been many a mischarge of justice, but surely forensics have advanced to the point where it would hard to convict the wrong person.
The deal here is that both genders have to respect each other and treat each other well and fairly
Both genders can practice their sexualities in the ways they prefer (without stepping out of moral and ethical lines)
The rule is to live and let live.
Teaching people to not do horrible things to each other (both genders), will contribute to the reduction of rapes and sexual harassment. it is for both genders and parties to play the part and cooperate
On the death penalty, for bad news, society is very lenient in the way of treating criminals, it is a complicated issue indeed
Sorry this is so short for taking so long to reply. I didn’t really know what to say. I’m at least sure this time that there are fewer mistakes.
Well of course.
Again, of course.
Yes, but again, we cannot get rid of the typical attitudes completely. For example,in roughly…fifty years’ time (I’m just trying to be realistic, judging from how long it took women to gain most of their rights), men will be fully accepted as victims of abuse and rape.
Um-hm. Oh, I’m not saying that we should start bringing back public executions. That would endanger the public and cause suffering for the perpetrator’s family (unless they are the cause or were involved the perpetrator’s crimes, I believe they should be treated with the same respect as the victim’s loved ones). I just think we give them too much. However, I still believe they should have rights to books and art (recently my wonderful government tried to ban families bringing books, and books entirely, and later on art). I am very big on justice, but no-one, not even criminals or those in asylums, should be derived of the written word. Nor should art be banned. Yes, the things these…people…have created are disturbing, but, obviously, that also gives us in an insight into their mind. Yes, unless we are those ourselves, we can never completely understand the mind of such an individual, but research still should be done. Oh, and another important issue in that regard is famed people, celebrities, being treated more better and given more lenient sentences.
There I went, off topic again. I’m just a very political person, you see.
I see you are very informed Women and men need to redefine the concepts of what is masculine and what is feminine, our generation is a wonderful mosaic in comparison to older generations. We embody the complexity of human nature, not based of natural laws and social laws, but on our individuality and uniqueness. However I do believe our generation needs the value of social responsibility and drive for improvement. simply open your mind to new theories and ideas, and through them built your mosaic
Have you noticed I how wonderful is to discuss and have an open mind? Humans have the need for mental enrichment
Well, I don’t think we should label femininity or masculinity as ‘acting like a woman/man”. We should just think of them as traits, and which traits we perfer or display. And most of us are a mixture of both, anyway, as I am guessing you agree from the last sentence.
Yes, I do. Anyone would perfer it to arguing. Yes, I like having a good, pleasant conversation as much as any person, but sometimes, debate is good for learning or practicing communication.
Haven't we debated as well? We have put our ideas to the table and explained them in quite long comments as you will see But hey, it exercises the the mind to understand oneself and be open to new ideas, aye?
Sorry this took so long I've been...busy, let's just say that. Indeed. And I do so enjoy long comments I can think about and have to take time and thinking to respond to. Aye, sur. I'm getting to be a little more open with each of the better conversations.
Though you have every right to, I'm just disappointed that even though we are typing so calmly and eloquently to one another, you still insult me in your conversations with that lassie. And I don't block so fast nor, have any reason to block you. I only block spammers and invaders (people who jump onto your profile to leave insults).
Let me see the comments history......The only insult that I gave you was the word "ignorant"
Have you notice that in the later comments I stopped insulting? After that, there were critiques with no informal insulting
This happen many days ago, actually, there is no longer a need to insult, and that feeling took place days ago We showed each others' views eloquently with not much results, only having a truce of "agree to disagree"
But it's OK, these type of conversations are the ones that wake up my brain fully, it is good for the soul to inquire
*facepalms* She's really so misogynistic as to say that a woman is in part to blame if they get sexually harassed because they are confident with their body?? It doesn't matter what the woman is wearing, a man ought to have enough self control to respect another person. Never is an outfit grounds to harass anybody. I see a handsome man dressed in an admirable way but do I ever go up and start touching him? Fuck no. That's completely inappropriate in societal standards and in regards to his personal space and feelings. Women shouldn't have to hide themselves because some people can't control themselves and men shouldn't either. We should all have the self control and moral to not harass anybody just because they're dressed nicely or revealing. By her standards, everybody should go to the pool or beach in pants and long sleeved shirts >_>
It shouldn't be one or the other responsibility, it's BOTH sides responsibility to behave with restraint and respect. If somebody, man or woman, sees somebody passed out or very drunk, it's their responsibility to behave like a moral and respectful person and not take advantage. Even if that other person isn't doing so, SOMEBODY ought to. Just because somebody else is being irresponsible, that doesn't justify others to be as well. Never is it okay to take advantage of somebody who is incapacitated. Doing so makes you a pervert with no self control or respect.
As adults, it's our job to behave responsibly even if others are not. That's what being an adult is.
In regards to sex, she truly is ignorant about it if she thinks all STDs have obvious signs and that everybody is honest about having one. This simply proves that.
Even if people were to follow her sick little values, a virgin woman could hook up with a man who has had previous partners and he could give her an STD because he lied about it/didn't tell her, the symptoms were not present and/or he didn't know he had one because some people are just carriers. So now that woman has to suffer an STD even though she followed Naokos ridiculous rules and because in her little world, researching and treating STD is 'a waste' and in her world, a woman isn't allowed to be choosy about the men she hooks up with, only men are allowed to be choosy so she can't tell him no just because he's had partners before her. I wonder what she'd have to say to that!
Ah, again you Feminists are so quick to throw out that word. Again with the shaming of sexual men. Flirting is not 'harassment'. You can wear whatever you want, whenever you want, but just know that it may elicit certain feelings. Hell, you could be dressed in a Burka and I just know someone would be aroused. You just ignore it. You trying to see men can't do that is oppression and again, blatant hypocrisy when you consider all the rants about women's sexual 'freedom'. The flirting person is 'out of control'. They are acting on their lust. Nothing wrong with that. I used to wear mini-skirts with legs when a used to a bit more feminine, and sometimes (thankfully rarely) told that men were staring at my butt. Now, of course I was annoyed, being that, unlike some, my body is not an object, but did I start screaming and calling them perverts or rapists or anything? No, as that is their desire. They are free to it. I'm sure it has happened with my still-strong love of skinny jeans, though I've not been informed if so.
It is not 'taking advantage' if the drunken person is all over the other person.
As for STDs, no I do not think that. Again you all assume that because I am aversed to sex and will never be fucked does not mean I am unaware or uneducated in such things. I know perfectly well that some are even completely symptomless. I know people lie too. It's an embarrassing thing, is it not?
She (and so it would be for a he) choose to have sex and risk it. You cannot choose to have cancer (for the most person'), Leukaemia, asthma, psoriasis, AIDs/HIV, cystic fibrosis, Huntington’s disease, cerebral palsy, Down's Syndrome, epilepsy, Kleine-Levin syndrome, OVD, etc. Sorry to list such common ailments, but I was given you an idea. I even know that virgins can have some form of STD when they haven't so much as masturbated.
As usual, you have no fucking idea what you're even talking about.
Make up your damn mind. Is the world wrong for shaming sexual men or is the world wrong for shaming virgin men? Nobody is shaming anybody. I for one don't give a damn if whoever I'm with is a virgin or not. I do like a virgin man because they're more eager and not so quick to become bored like sexual men and that's my right to prefer virgin men. I can be choosy all I want. My body, I get to choose who touches it and who I have sex with.
No duh it's going to elicit certain feelings but when men start to cat call and touch that's inappropriate. Men are adults who should know how to behave despite how they're feeling. They're expected to behave maturely when they're pissed off, they're expected to behave maturely when they see a nice body or a nice pair or legs or what have you. It's not hypocritical to dress in shorts and a tanktop when it's 95 degrees f and expect men to not bother you over it. I dunno how hot it gets there but here in Oklahoma, you can literally fry an egg on your cars dashboard so I should be able to go out in my shorts and tank and not have to stress over men trying to touch me (in any way) or cat call and make inappropriate remarks. It's not a woman's job to put up with men, it's a man's job to not behave like a pig to begin with. Some women don't or can't handle those situations so it's unfair to them to have to put up with that kind of thing just because you think they have it coming because they wore shorts or a skirt and a top that shows some skin.
They have the right to find a woman attractive but it's inappropriate to make that woman feel uncomfortably in the outfit she has the right to wear. No woman should have to dress a certain way just to avoid piggish behavior.
If somebody is drunk and another person takes advantage of that, that's completely scummy. If a drunk person comes onto somebody who is sober, that, to me, seems a lot less scummy since the person being approached is fully capable of making decisions though the person doing the approaching might not have ordinarily done such a thing.
No, actually. Nobody is assuming you're uneducated about sex because you're asexual. We say you are uneducated about sex because of the things you have said yourself and are still saying. It's not about your sexuality. Seriously, get over it already. Nobody cares that you're asexual. People care that you're trying to stomp on female reproductive/sexual rights.
Exactly what kind of STD does a virgin get? By your silly set of rules, a woman is condemned even if she has sex with one man who has had partners before her (which you say is allowed) and has an STD that is passed to her. You call researching sex and the diseases a waste of resources but in reality, the aforementioned scenario is common. In your little world, she would be doomed to suffer an STD even though she followed your rules because in your world, no research would be done to find treatments and/or cures. If that man left her, she couldn't have sex ever again because of her STD and/or because in your world, she would be cheating on her next boyfriend.
Both sexual and non-sexual men are shamed. Sexual men are shamed for daring to have a sex drive and look at women in a sexual manner. Virgin men are shamed for not having yet put his penis into a woman’s vagina (as if that’s a big deal). And homosexual men are shamed for…being homosexual men, especially if they are on the bottom. And before you go saying I’m a hypocrite, a homosexual man is not letting someone of the opposite gender take and dominate him. No, it’s not.
No, it’s not. It’s natural and fine. That is shaming. Yes, they do, they are fully aware of they are doing, as I think you would know. It was your choice to wear those, as needed as it would be. It is the aroused man’s natural reaction in the form of hastily-put together words. It is not ‘inappropriate’ or being a ‘pig’. Again, you should your hypocrisy, in that woman are allowed to be as sexual as they want and no one is permitted a negative opinon, or they are ‘MISOGYNISTS!’, ‘SEXISTS!’ or ‘OPPRESSORS!!!!’. Again, they have no right to complain of being ‘bothered’ when they have already objectified themselves. I, along with other virgin woman, have a right to complain about that as we are not hypocrites, and we are in full control of our bodies. Then maybe she should grow a backbone. It is called equality. If girls are permitted to be as sexual as they want, so are men. And people are allowed a negative opinion on that. Non-virgin woman are hypocrites to judge and complain.
No, it’s not. It is not someone else’s job to stop or look after that drunk person, who choose to get drunk, unless they have requested such. Of course, if I were ever to have friends like that (I never would), I would not just abandon them like some holidaymakers and partygoers do, but I would let them make their own mistakes and learn the hard way. We all make mistakes.
Urgh, again with this. I am expressing my right to an opinion, on one’s choice, as is my right. I am not sitting there whining about freedom of speech and truth equality like you faux-feminists who think all sexual women are perfect, ‘liberated’ beings. If I were to get behind the wheel of a car and went barrelling down the motorway, I would know I would be judged and insulted. That would be someone’s right to do so. If I were to write something in my original story is incredibly narmy, far too cliché, or just plain stupid, I would be judged for it, and people would be free to it. Sex is no different. What is so bloody hard to understand about that, ‘feminist’? You lot also constantly assume that the sex thing is my whole life and think me some heartless idiot, when, if you had actually read my journals and got to know me, would know I have other interests and pursuits, and hold empathy and care within me. You assume I know not of simple things like masturbation, wet dreams, arousal, orgasms, dominatrixes (even if she is ‘dominant’, it is in a typically false, feminine manner, such as that of the femme fatale, and she usually has been/will let herself be penetrated). While we are of course equals and make choices together, I am dominant as I control myself, and take charge emotionally. I’m it would count for physically as well, as I would be the one to make the protective moves (as I’m not some damsel-in-distress who likes a man being a chauvinist, chivalrous pig). I’m also the one to resort to defensive/arger-caused violence, as well, though I know most would not consider that a good thing. And the stereotypical kind of violent of slapping. Finally, as I said, we kiss, hug and hold each other.
Oral herpes, for one. You can also gain diseases from towels or toilet seats, given that people have done things on them (that, combined with my great mysophobia), keeps from public bathrooms as much as possible. Ok, the thing about her never having sex again is understandable, if she was planning to have a baby some time. That would not be fair.
No one 'deserves' rape. I never said nor implied that. Your lot keep saying I should be raped. And even if that were to happen, you fail to see the problem: I would be a virgin, and therefore not a hypocrite, and even though I would technically be a non-virgin and traumatized, it could happen again, as I would not have willing given my body to other.
What the? You do not deserve to be raped. No-one deserves that.if they are indeed saying that they are in the wrong. People are suggesting you try some stuff voluntarily out yourself because maybe if you did you would stop thinking getting off is some abomination unto woman kind. I don't know why you fear it so much or hate it or whatever but frankly you need to get over that fear because it's making you sound horrible. But no-one seriously wants to force you.
If you don't think women deserve it that's good but you come across as very hateful. If a woman was raped, virgin or not, a normal person would feel compassion and horror,. It doesn't matter if she is s virgin or what she's wearing or if she's germy or anything. It's horrible and traumatic no matter what. But you don't seem to care at all if it happens to be someone you deem a 'slut' this is heartless. If it happened to a woman (or man) you don't say she's a hypocrite for complaining you help her and try to get justice for what's happened.
If you want people to leave you alone try turning around. Try saying, or at least consider non-virgins are people too and aren't some evil germy sex-crazed zombies trying to hurt men or oppress them. I don't know why you think that.
I do not ‘fear’ it. Or anything sexual. It is their sexist, oppressive, double standard filled, petty, misandric attitude that I do not like. I would not need to be so hard if they were not such whiney little wimps dressing up their whinging and fear of judgment as ‘feminism’. Thank you for separating yourself from these…others.
I do feel compassion – for those who are actually suffering. I feel no sympathy for hypocrites getting their karma and not understand that that trauma and pain they suffer is them realizing and regretting throwing themselves at a man for no good reason. I am not ‘heartless’ and have mentioned numerous times the evidence that proves I am not, reasons that apply to yourselves too, I’m certain – I give to charity, I really want to help the poor in person, I fight for men and women’s rights, I fight against the dismissal and humiliation of male abuse and rape victims. I fight for GLBT rights, of course. I am a political person and try to fight, or at least bring attention to, injustice in the political world. Those others keep judging me and thinking they know me when they know nothing of me, and keep spouting the same clichés and pseudo-intelligent babble.
Again, it is their attitude. They will not stop whinging about people’s right to an opinion on their choice, so why should others stop having that rightful, just opinion? And they are germy, like it or not. We are all germy. Non-virgin woman, due to the way sex works, be it hetero or homosexual, just carry that little bit more. They are people, then. Just very immature people. They are girls.
"I do not ‘fear’ it. Or anything sexual. It is their sexist, oppressive, double standard filled, petty, misandric attitude that I do not like."
And non-virgins contain these attributes so often... why? Why do you see them all like that?
"would not need to be so hard if they were not such whiney little wimps dressing up their whinging and fear of judgment as ‘feminism’. "
You seem to be hung up on the whole "feminism" word. Why not scribble it out and replace the word with "women who want the same things men get while men get what women have." and tell me why that's so bad. It seems fair to me.
"I do feel compassion – for those who are actually suffering. I feel no sympathy for hypocrites getting their karma and not understand that that trauma and pain they suffer is them realizing and regretting throwing themselves at a man for no good reason. "
And this exception to your compassion is why people are getting upset at you. There shouldn't be any exception at all. A woman isn't hurting anyone by having a sexual relationship with anyone (a man, woman, inbetween, or herself) unless she is raping someone. Why is it karma that she get's hurt so severely then? How can you not feel bad for someone who goes through something so horrible? Even if what a woman was doing was wrong, that's like saying someone who steals deserves torture, it's beyond extreme.
"I am not ‘heartless’ and have mentioned numerous times the evidence that proves I am not, reasons that apply to yourselves too, I’m certain – I give to charity, I really want to help the poor in person, I fight for men and women’s rights, I fight against the dismissal and humiliation of male abuse and rape victims. I fight for GLBT rights, of course. I am a political person and try to fight, or at least bring attention to, injustice in the political world. " Well, yeah, okay. That may be true. And I couldn't really say you were some ruthless monster out of the pits of hell even without you saying that. It still doesn't make what you're saying about non-virgins right though.
Thing is, try looking it from other's point of view. Take homophobia, which you are adamant against. If some homophobic guy went on some hate-speech saying gay men who get bashed are only getting God's will and it's what they get for defiling their bodies with some evil sin or whatever nonsense a homophobic person says, what are you going to do? Call him out on what he's saying? Call him a bad person? What if he turns around at these accusations, and says "But I'm not a bad person, I donate to charity, I fight against racism, etc etc.." would you, should you, say "Jinkies! I had no idea! You're a swell guy after all! Just let me turn my back and allow you to continue on with your little hate speech!" Or would you say "That's all very well and nice, but what you're doing is still wrong and you really should stop."
"Those others keep judging me and thinking they know me when they know nothing of me, and keep spouting the same clichés and pseudo-intelligent babble. " That pseudo-intellectual babble is others trying to reason with you. But you're right, they don't know you, no-body does, they are making judgements based on what they have observed so far. But you can help by letting them or others get to know you, and you try getting to know them and other non-virgins and see that they aren't so bad people. Maybe a bit more reasoning on what your problem is/ are, because (I admit this is just a guess) some of your dislike might be stemming from something that happened to you IRL. Maybe some girl was a bitch to you, maybe your Dad was a jerk, IDK. And they have been guessing, because they want to know why you have all this hate, or "dislike".
"Again, it is their attitude. They will not stop whinging about people’s right to an opinion on their choice, so why should others stop having that rightful, just opinion?" Well yeah, we all have our right to free-speech. They have theirs and you have yours. It's just kind of getting a bit of conflict regarding the nature of their arguing: rape. Which is a serious form of violence, which nobody wants. And you don't want someone around encouraging violence, do you? They don't want some rape victim seeing what you wrote and getting hurt, or some psycho reading this and getting the idea it's okay to rape someone.
"And they are germy, like it or not. We are all germy. Non-virgin woman, due to the way sex works, be it hetero or homosexual, just carry that little bit more. " So? We can argue whether or not non-virgins are germy (and frankly I'm stumped why you would think a girl who jills off gets "germy", or at least germy in the manner it can't be washed off or cause a serious illness). But in the end, so what? People who work with sewage are germy. People in poorer countries are germy. Lots of people are germy. Pilots are at risk of getting who knows how many diseases. Should they be looked down upon for eg. say their choices in career etc? Should they be treated any less? Does it mean they should be attacked and that it serves them right, or that it serves them right if they contract a serious illness that it's just "karma" and no-one should help them?
"They are people, then. Just very immature people. They are girls. " Once again, So? Lots of people are immature. I'm immature a lot of the time. It's no reason to not feel bad for them when they get raped.
I do not see them all like that. They are just what I encounter most when simply browsing for me own means, some whiney little flower on Tumblr, Feminsite, Jezebel, LiveJournal This Slut Votes, the SlutWalk bullshit that is still going on, an affront to feminism (it just made our reputation fall even lower), and self respecting women everywhere. This very deviation (along with many, selfish, sexist, petty others) is an example of such an attitude. This being the ‘anti-abortion is ANTI-WOMENZ!” when they turn around and be completely anti-responsibility, anti-male, and selfish. They claim that medical and necessary ultrasound (yes, it is necessary, to make sure the woman is absolutely willing to murder something she once was in one of the greatest acts of hypocrisy there can be), when they already been penetrated by a germ-riddled penis. There is nothing ‘sexist’, ‘misogynistic’ or ‘controlling women’s bodies’ or ‘reproductive rights’. It is hypocrisy, they already gave their body to another.
But it is not that. They want to be free from all rightful, equality-supporting judgement and criticism will they scream at men for doing so much as harmless wolf whistling, while they call men perverts and rapists for daring to express their sexuality. And most laughably of all, they say, that men being sexually attracted to them, is ‘misogynistic’. I fight for actually rights, something few feminists do nowadays, continuing to add to our reputation. As a result, people who support men’s rights too are told to call themselves ‘humanists’. Don’t get wrong, I don’t mind the title, but the problem is that feminist is seen as a bad thing, and girls like this are not helping.
Yes she is. She is spreading germs and most likely disease as well. She is insulting feminism and naturalness of pregnancy. If I were stolen from if I steal before, I would have no reason to complain, no non-virgin women have nothing to complain about. I understand that some easily-offended people might be upset about this, being that it is true equality (taking responsibility for one’s actions, instead of calling it ‘victim blaming’. but I simply do not support hypocrisy. And yes, I know we are all hypocrites. If she was engaged or marriage and that happened, even if she had sex with her fiancé, husband or wife, as she has made a commitment to someone.
Well, thank you. Well, I’m sorry, but it is just the way I think, and it is made worse because of these selfish attitudes that exist. If a woman were to just have sex for pleasure with her partner, behind closed doors, that would be fine, they are not affection anyone else. It is when they scream about non-existent ‘double standards’, while ignoring the biological logical behind such a (perfectly allowed) opinon, and say that having casual sex is good, and, as I said, shoving their non-virginity and so-called ‘liberation’ (when it is far from it) down everyone’s throats, instead of focusing on real issues. A good ‘feminist blog’ I have found is The Mary Sue, for example. She cares about women and men and fights against bigger issues (as well as sexism in pop culture/fiction, something seen as trivial and meaningless, despite how much it effects and has effected real life).
The difference is, having recreational heterosexual intercourse is a choice. Homosexuality, no matter what some cunts say, is not a choice. It is natural attraction to the same gender. Yes, heterosexual lust and attraction is natural too I know. It is just that homosexual intercourse is far less likely to be selfish (that’s not to say there is not homosexual manipulators or rapists). I also understand that homosexuals are not perfect, as well, but that they are simply human, and humans judge and are judged, make choices, sometimes stupid/pointless/selfish ones.
No, no, if someone wants to have a calm conversation about it, then I am happy. Just as I would be happy to have a conversation with a homophobe is understand why they think (well, if it were reasons outside ‘it’s an abomination!’ or ‘God says so!’). Those are the very clichés, though. That it was thought it by religion, that I was molested/raped, or (and I laughed at this) dumped for a sexually active girl. You say it is because of my mother or my ‘father’ that I have ‘daddy issues’ ( I couldn’t care less about my ‘father’, and I was barely a year old when my mother left him), and my mother, like all good parents, taught me and give me the tools to learn, but let me think for myself. It is those attitudes (the father/rape thing) that annoys me. They also came out with crap that Matt is only with me as he hopes to get sex one day, and that we won’t last because we don’t have sex and that ‘when his balls drop’ he dump me for someone else, even though they are plenty of non-sexual ways to be romantic. We kiss on the lips, for example.They know nothing of our relationship, how long we’ve known each other (and when I explained such, of course they did not believe me, and continued with their perceived image of me), while being all smug about their ‘normal’ and not ‘shallow’ relationships.
Well, as I’ve said before, no matter how much we wash down there, we will still produce natural but disgusting fluids. You can’t ‘wash off’ one of biggest changes in your life (and that fact is that is considered something so little nowadays is so…cold). No, those are needed, as they need those jobs to live, or to enjoy life, and those germs, bar the sewage, are not so intimate.
Oh, and I never thought non-virgins were not human. I was just sick of the rage so I threw out a sarcastic comment. Again, it’s the hypocrisy bit. I at least acknowledge the ways in wish I am hypocritical, an example being I am and consider myself a strong woman, but insult that but my needless crying. I don’t like boastful or cocky people, but like most people, I boast sometimes as well. Again, an overused statement, but we are human.
“I do not see them all like that. They are just what I encounter most when simply browsing for me own means, some whiney little flower on Tumblr, Feminsite, Jezebel, LiveJournal This Slut Votes, the SlutWalk bullshit that is still going on, an affront to feminism (it just made our reputation fall even lower), and self respecting women everywhere.”
And why are you going to those sites in the first place?
“This very deviation (along with many, selfish, sexist, petty others) is an example of such an attitude. This being the ‘anti-abortion is ANTI-WOMENZ!” when they turn around and be completely anti-responsibility, anti-male, and selfish. They claim that medical and necessary ultrasound (yes, it is necessary, to make sure the woman is absolutely willing to murder something she once was in one of the greatest acts of hypocrisy there can be), when they already been penetrated by a germ-riddled penis. There is nothing ‘sexist’, ‘misogynistic’ or ‘controlling women’s bodies’ or ‘reproductive rights’. It is hypocrisy, they already gave their body to another. “
Because you know it is their own body which they own (and still own no matter who they have sex with), and have a right to preserve their own life if a pregnancy might risk her life or a possible child’s well-being. And yeah it is irresponsible if a woman goes around screwing willy nilly without protection. But it’s waaay more irresponsible to bring a life into the world where the woman has neither the finances nor the competence to look after a child which ends up with a kid starving to death in a cupboard in a pile of its own faeces because the mother knows squat about raising children. An abortion on the other hand is terminating a “life” before it begins a life of suffering. And just because an embryo was what each of us where at that point doesn’t mean we should preserve it. We were an ovum once, does that mean every time a woman has her period she is committing murder?
“But it is not that. They want to be free from all rightful, equality-supporting judgement and criticism will they scream at men for doing so much as harmless wolf whistling, while they call men perverts and rapists for daring to express their sexuality. And most laughably of all, they say, that men being sexually attracted to them, is ‘misogynistic’. I fight for actually rights, something few feminists do nowadays, continuing to add to our reputation. As a result, people who support men’s rights too are told to call themselves ‘humanists’. Don’t get wrong, I don’t mind the title, but the problem is that feminist is seen as a bad thing, and girls like this are not helping.”
If a guy (or a girl) is running around in the privacy of her home oogling over porn or something, this is expressing their sexuality and these girls should mind their own business. If a guy (or a girl) is out on the streets harassing someone this isn’t expressing their sexuality, they’re being a jerk, and it’s what people do to rile people up. I mean, you didn’t like it when you started getting all this attention lately, and you complained, why can’t they? But no, someone “wolf-whistling” isn’t a rapist. They may be over-reacting, but then, what have you been doing lately on certain other sites?
“Yes she is. She is spreading germs and most likely disease as well.”
Not if she’s getting the guy to wear a rubber, she isn’t. Or, you know, jilling off on her own (who would she be spreading the “germs” to?). Or people who get blood tests first, to make sure they haven’t got anything before they do anything.
If she knew she had something and intentionally spread something, yeah, that would be wrong though. Most of the time though, people try to stop the spread of disease.
“She is insulting feminism and naturalness of pregnancy.”
And an insult is seriously harmful, because…?
“If I were stolen from if I steal before, I would have no reason to complain, no non-virgin women have nothing to complain about.”
Ummm, no no no no. Stealing can’t even begin to equate with something like rape. Stealing is a petty crime (which is why I gave an example before), while rape is extreme violence, and there is never any excuse for it. And why would consensual sex be considered stealing? Because she gave her body once to a guy and it belongs to him now? That’s like saying people have the right to steal then vandalise e a bunch of books from a library which lends out books just because it some people have borrowed from it before.
You don’t get a book from a library to keep forever, you RETURN it. And you don’t damage it, because it still isn’t your property. You take it for an allotted period of time with your library card, enjoy it, then give it back. If you don’t, or take the book without permission, you’re in trouble, and the librarian has every right to send you a fine. And as such, if a man or woman rapes a person they should be punished for it as no-one has the right to have sex without someone’s consent.
“I understand that some easily-offended people might be upset about this, being that it is true equality (taking responsibility for one’s actions, instead of calling it ‘victim blaming’. but I simply do not support hypocrisy. And yes, I know we are all hypocrites. If she was engaged or marriage and that happened, even if she had sex with her fiancé, husband or wife, as she has made a commitment to someone.”
Commitments can end. And committing to one person does not mean committing to every other single male on the planet for the rest of eternity.
“Well, thank you. Well, I’m sorry, but it is just the way I think, and it is made worse because of these selfish attitudes that exist. If a woman were to just have sex for pleasure with her partner, behind closed doors, that would be fine, they are not affection anyone else.”
Which is what “non-virgins” do. (Or should be doing).
“It is when they scream about non-existent ‘double standards’, while ignoring the biological logical behind such a (perfectly allowed) opinon, and say that having casual sex is good, and, as I said, shoving their non-virginity and so-called ‘liberation’ (when it is far from it) down everyone’s throats, instead of focusing on real issues. A good ‘feminist blog’ I have found is The Mary Sue, for example. She cares about women and men and fights against bigger issues (as well as sexism in pop culture/fiction, something seen as trivial and meaningless, despite how much it effects and has effected real life).”
Abortion is a real issue though.
“The difference is, having recreational heterosexual intercourse is a choice. Homosexuality, no matter what some cunts say, is not a choice. It is natural attraction to the same gender. Yes, heterosexual lust and attraction is natural too I know. It is just that homosexual intercourse is far less likely to be selfish (that’s not to say there is not homosexual manipulators or rapists). I also understand that homosexuals are not perfect, as well, but that they are simply human, and humans judge and are judged, make choices, sometimes stupid/pointless/selfish ones.”
How is heterosexual sex selfish? “Germs”? Once again you have condoms and blood-tests for that. Pregnancy? Okay, if homosexual sex is better because it can’t result in pregnancy, what about women who are infertile. Women who have gone past menopause? Girls who are above legal age but haven’t finished puberty (it’s 2-3 years after a girl starts bleeding before she starts ovulating). A woman who is on her period? Women who use contraceptives? None of these will result in pregnancy either so why not group them with homosexuals too?
“No, no, if someone wants to have a calm conversation about it, then I am happy. Just as I would be happy to have a conversation with a homophobe is understand why they think (well, if it were reasons outside ‘it’s an abomination!’ or ‘God says so!’).”
Okay
“Those are the very clichés, though. That it was thought it by religion, that I was molested/raped, or (and I laughed at this) dumped for a sexually active girl. You say it is because of my mother or my ‘father’ that I have ‘daddy issues’ ( I couldn’t care less about my ‘father’, and I was barely a year old when my mother left him), and my mother, like all good parents, taught me and give me the tools to learn, but let me think for myself. It is those attitudes (the father/rape thing) that annoys me.”
It was a guess. People come up with these things because your ideas had to come from somewhere. I don’t get it though. You just one day (or took a while to come up with this) decided to say “non-virgins can’t be raped”?
“They also came out with crap that Matt is only with me as he hopes to get sex one day, and that we won’t last because we don’t have sex and that ‘when his balls drop’ he dump me for someone else, even though they are plenty of non-sexual ways to be romantic. We kiss on the lips, for example.They know nothing of our relationship, how long we’ve known each other (and when I explained such, of course they did not believe me, and continued with their perceived image of me), while being all smug about their ‘normal’ and not ‘shallow’ relationships.”
I’m kind of guessing it was to get you riled up. And in some cases out there this does happen in relationships. People change. Your BF might change. YOU might change. It might be something to keep in mind, at least as a mental exercise. And no, no-one knows how you and your BF are, that’s your businesses’.
“Well, as I’ve said before, no matter how much we wash down there, we will still produce natural but disgusting fluids.”
It isn’t that disgusting.
“You can’t ‘wash off’ one of biggest changes in your life (and that fact is that is considered something so little nowadays is so…cold). No, those are needed, as they need those jobs to live, or to enjoy life, and those germs, bar the sewage, are not so intimate. “
Except we do need sex to enjoy life. I mean, why should I or any women go every minute every day every year for the rest of their lives never getting any relief from an irritating cramp or burning down there for? Why put up with that?
“Oh, and I never thought non-virgins were not human. I was just sick of the rage so I threw out a sarcastic comment. Again, it’s the hypocrisy bit. I at least acknowledge the ways in wish I am hypocritical, an example being I am and consider myself a strong woman, but insult that but my needless crying. I don’t like boastful or cocky people, but like most people, I boast sometimes as well. Again, an overused statement, but we are human.”
I was curious as to what others who claim to be feminists believe.
No, they have not right to be selfish, hypocritical monsters. They were a foetus once, they were once that ‘parasite’, that ‘accident’, that ‘mistake’, that [insert other, sick, disgusting words for an innocent life here]. Every thing on the planet is technically a parasite, as we must feed on another living thing to survive (most plants are perhaps the expection). Besides, a parasite is defined as a creature of other species. No, it was irresponsible for her to go sleeping around full stop. Pregnancy does not to be ‘protected’ from. Nor is it an ‘accident’ or ‘unwanted’. If it was, that woman would not have choosen to have sex. If she could not ‘afford it’ (which is bullshit anyway), or ‘was not ready’ then she would not be ready to have a penis inside her. Pregnancy, apart from childbirth, is nothing compared to sex that came before it. No one can predict the future. My mother given the suggestion to abort me because of my conditions, they said I would never walk, talk, read or write. And I’ve done that and so much more. How would she have known that if she was so selfish (not to mention she wanted a child). If the ‘women’ (or stupid, selfish girl) really is so heartless and inhuman, then she can find another family to give the child to. It is not ‘selfish’, it is not ‘sexist’, it is not ‘oppressive’ or ‘trying to control women’ (when they have allowed themselves to be controlled by men), it is equality for all. And again, just like others who believe that disgusting, selfish, sexist attitude, you ignore the potential suffering of the man who just lost his child. That’s not utterly sexist, a double standard, and hypocritical or anything. Here we go with the period excuse. That, again, is natural. Simple. Just like pregnancy is.
Not if they are boasting about it and calling it their ‘feminist right’ or whatever. It is not ‘harassment’ or when that girl has already broken that great boundary. She is hypocritical to complain as she is a sexual being. It is natural, as OMG, men have a right to a sex drive as well. I just keep coming back to correct the idiotic assumptions and pettiness of these compete strangers.
As I said, it gives feminism a bad name and encourages selfishness and sexism against men.
It is not ‘extreme’. They are far more extreme things you can do to harm the body, my dear. Rape is not some special crime. It is simply abuse as horrid as any other. Let me give another example then – if I were hit someone who did not deserve it, then I could not complain about someone else striking me, as I’ve already done that. Excluding the marriage/engagement thing I mentioned, that girl is a hypocrite for claiming rape as she had already been penetrated and regardless of the damage, it makes no difference to her status. And I also explained why she is really traumatized, but again, that is not make the mental suffering any less real.
That’s not what I meant. What I meant is, if a virgin woman became engaged or married someone, male or female, and even if they were to have sex with them, they could still be raped, as they have made a commitment to someone and that violator is also violating the commitment. As for the other bit, if a virgin woman were to have sex with a man/woman and commit to them, then for some reason they break up (I’m not saying it is her fault), and she get manages to get a relationship with another man or woman, she is a hypocrite if she ever claims he or she is ‘cheating’ on or ‘betraying’ her, as she already cheated on them. They just had the kindness and goodness to forgive her (they do that if they pursue the relationship). If that woman was a widow, however, then I suppose it can be considered cheating on the other partner’s part (you know, the whole ‘death do us part’ bit).
Well, they don’t.
No, it is not an ‘issue’. The issue is that it exists for non-rape reasons.
I already explained – the selfishness in regards to pregnancy and the possible betrayal. They have no reason to have sex, but can still chose to if they wish. Again, I never said or implied I would stop anyone making that choice. I am not one of those disgusting people who think a woman who does not want children (again, if she did not, she would not partake in heterosexual intercourse for ‘fun’), or is infertile is horrible person or, sickeningly, ‘broken’. Again, it’s the attitudes I dislike.
I’ve said that before too. As my mother was not one to lie, when I put forth the big baby question at six, she bought me a book (for children) called “Where do I Come From?. Of course, these idiots on here think she ‘traumatized me’ and that a six year old could not possibility understand such a thing. The other parents were like that too, “*gasp* it has nude pictures! That’s obscene!”. And as I learned more in reproduction lessons (what you would call ‘sex ed’, I’m guessing) in science in first and second year, then biology and human biology the rest, I began to formulate my views, as I thought about the way sex worked.
I can safely say I will never be interested in sex. Yes, I might want to get pregnant someday, you never know (but not in the ‘my biological clock is ticking’ kind of way), but I still wholly wish to adopt, but only when I’ve had my life first. I have my friends, my writing, my curiosity, until then. Yes, I’ve stopped judging other people’s non-marital relationships as being more then just sex, so maybe they should stop their stereotyping of mine. People also think he a ‘doormat’ because he dares do what a woman tells him, and think that he wishes to ‘protect’ or ‘save’ when he’s anything but a chauvinist pig. A certain someone also thinks he’ll agree if anything I see because if not, I would ‘rage’ and thinks that I am also ‘raging’. Another stereotype, as her experiences do not apply to all.
They contain waste products. How can they not be disgusting? And most women don’t exactly look forward to periods.
If you ‘need’ sex (sex is not a ‘need’ unless you are a man unable to come from masturbation or wet dreams), then you are a pretty sad person indeed. What does that say for asexuals?
“I was curious as to what others who claim to be feminists believe. “
Fair enough
“No, they have not right to be selfish, hypocritical monsters. They were a foetus once, they were once that ‘parasite’, that ‘accident’, that ‘mistake’, that [insert other, sick, disgusting words for an innocent life here]. Every thing on the planet is technically a parasite, as we must feed on another living thing to survive (most plants are perhaps the expection). Besides, a parasite is defined as a creature of other species. No, it was irresponsible for her to go sleeping around full stop. Pregnancy does not to be ‘protected’ from. Nor is it an ‘accident’ or ‘unwanted’. If it was, that woman would not have choosen to have sex. If she could not ‘afford it’ (which is bullshit anyway), or ‘was not ready’ then she would not be ready to have a penis inside her. Pregnancy, apart from childbirth, is nothing compared to sex that came before it. No one can predict the future. My mother given the suggestion to abort me because of my conditions, they said I would never walk, talk, read or write. And I’ve done that and so much more. How would she have known that if she was so selfish (not to mention she wanted a child).”
I can see why you place a lot of value in “pro-life” considering your circumstances. Your case was a success story. This doesn’t always happen though, and there a lot of negative experiences out there that people are considering when having an abortion as well. And your case may just have easily have failed. What if you couldn’t walk or talk? What if you couldn’t see at all, and not hear?
What if your mother didn’t know how to raise a child and neglected to look after you? Yeah, like I said, people should be responsible and not get pregnant in the first place if they realise they can’t be parents (and some people are never “ready”). But to expect them to never have sex because of this is a bit much, but I’ll get to that later…
“If the ‘women’ (or stupid, selfish girl) really is so heartless and inhuman, then she can find another family to give the child to.”
You do realise how many orphans there are that never get people to look after them, right? And how rough it is for them, right?
“It is not ‘selfish’, it is not ‘sexist’, it is not ‘oppressive’ or ‘trying to control women’ (when they have allowed themselves to be controlled by men), it is equality for all. And again, just like others who believe that disgusting, selfish, sexist attitude, you ignore the potential suffering of the man who just lost his child. That’s not utterly sexist, a double standard, and hypocritical or anything.”
Thought exercise: what if it was the woman who wanted to keep the child, and the man who wanted her to get the abortion, because he didn’t want the responsibility? Guys do that sometimes, you know.
“Here we go with the period excuse. That, again, is natural. Simple. Just like pregnancy is.”
Miscarriages are natural too.
“Not if they are boasting about it and calling it their ‘feminist right’ or whatever. It is not ‘harassment’ or when that girl has already broken that great boundary. She is hypocritical to complain as she is a sexual being. It is natural, as OMG, men have a right to a sex drive as well. I just keep coming back to correct the idiotic assumptions and pettiness of these compete strangers.”
She has a right to complain. People need to work and study in harassment free environments. And harassment has little to do with sex drive and more to do with the harasser wanting to get a reaction out of the harrassee.
“As I said, it gives feminism a bad name and encourages selfishness and sexism against men. “
Some girls out there do. Maybe these bloggers or whatever are idiots but that doesn’t mean women everywhere who have a sex drive have to put up with men being an ass. It’s wrong for a woman to do that to a man so why not vice versa?
“It is not ‘extreme’. They are far more extreme things you can do to harm the body, my dear. Rape is not some special crime. It is simply abuse as horrid as any other.”
Yes that is true there are worse things. It is still a serious crime though.
“ Let me give another example then – if I were hit someone who did not deserve it, then I could not complain about someone else striking me, as I’ve already done that.”
Hitting someone is a form of harm. Having consensual sex with someone is not a form of harm. It is a reward; the guy and girl (or whatever variation of sexes) are enjoying each other’s company. If someone hit you after you gave them a reward that would be rather unfair wouldn’t it?
“Excluding the marriage/engagement thing I mentioned, that girl is a hypocrite for claiming rape as she had already been penetrated and regardless of the damage, it makes no difference to her status. And I also explained why she is really traumatized, but again, that is not make the mental suffering any less real.”
Her status.
So according to you, never mind the physical trauma, her reproductive (and possibly internal) organs bleeding, the lack of security, the disgust. It’s her status that she has to worry about. If she doesn’t have that, then why worry? Her status is such a precious thing to lose if she gave it up before it’s karma if she gets raped. She should never have given up her “status”. But if she was a virgin who lost her “status”, it’s a horrible atrocity.
Is that seriously what you’re saying?
“That’s not what I meant. What I meant is, if a virgin woman became engaged or married someone, male or female, and even if they were to have sex with them, they could still be raped, as they have made a commitment to someone and that violator is also violating the commitment. As for the other bit, if a virgin woman were to have sex with a man/woman and commit to them, then for some reason they break up (I’m not saying it is her fault), and she get manages to get a relationship with another man or woman, she is a hypocrite if she ever claims he or she is ‘cheating’ on or ‘betraying’ her, as she already cheated on them. They just had the kindness and goodness to forgive her (they do that if they pursue the relationship). If that woman was a widow, however, then I suppose it can be considered cheating on the other partner’s part (you know, the whole ‘death do us part’ bit).”
How can she cheat on him if she at the time didn’t even know him? How do you betray someone you don’t even know? Didn’t you already say you can’t predict the future? What if your BF decides to leave you or you leave him, does that mean you’ve already betrayed the next man (or woman) who loves you?
“Well, they don’t.”
You cannot judge the behaviour of the majority of “non-virgins” based on the opinions of a bunch of bloggers or LJers you found online.
“No, it is not an ‘issue’. The issue is that it exists for non-rape reasons.” It kind of is. It’s discussed on the news or talk shows and magazines quite a bit sometimes.
“I already explained – the selfishness in regards to pregnancy and the possible betrayal. They have no reason to have sex, but can still chose to if they wish. Again, I never said or implied I would stop anyone making that choice. I am not one of those disgusting people who think a woman who does not want children (again, if she did not, she would not partake in heterosexual intercourse for ‘fun’), or is infertile is horrible person or, sickeningly, ‘broken’. Again, it’s the attitudes I dislike.”
Okay
“I’ve said that before too. As my mother was not one to lie, when I put forth the big baby question at six, she bought me a book (for children) called “Where do I Come From?. Of course, these idiots on here think she ‘traumatized me’ and that a six year old could not possibility understand such a thing. The other parents were like that too, “*gasp* it has nude pictures! That’s obscene!”. And as I learned more in reproduction lessons (what you would call ‘sex ed’, I’m guessing) in science in first and second year, then biology and human biology the rest, I began to formulate my views, as I thought about the way sex worked.”
No offense, but I think you do seem kind of traumatised, but more likely from your “sex-ed”. It might not even be caused by either, but whatever the cause, you simply had some sort of issue with things and people speculated why that would be. And no, you’re not curled up on the bed in a catatonic state, but you seem to be highly concerned with virginity and STD’s and “germy penises” that most people don’t worry about. And yeah I know you go out and do other things and live life. But it has affected you in your behaviour towards others.
“I can safely say I will never be interested in sex. Yes, I might want to get pregnant someday, you never know (but not in the ‘my biological clock is ticking’ kind of way), but I still wholly wish to adopt, but only when I’ve had my life first. I have my friends, my writing, my curiosity, until then. Yes, I’ve stopped judging other people’s non-marital relationships as being more then just sex, so maybe they should stop their stereotyping of mine.
People also think he a ‘doormat’ because he dares do what a woman tells him, and think that he wishes to ‘protect’ or ‘save’ when he’s anything but a chauvinist pig. A certain someone also thinks he’ll agree if anything I see because if not, I would ‘rage’ and thinks that I am also ‘raging’. Another stereotype, as her experiences do not apply to all.”
I’m staying out of that.
“They contain waste products. How can they not be disgusting? And most women don’t exactly look forward to periods.”
Cum? It’s usually clean if a guy or girl washes beforehand and considered a fun and safe product of the body. Some people have even tried consuming it
“If you ‘need’ sex (sex is not a ‘need’ unless you are a man unable to come from masturbation or wet dreams), then you are a pretty sad person indeed. What does that say for asexuals?”
Well, sexual release anyway, I should have said sexual activity. What can I say though, women have needs. It’s like needing to go to the toilet, you can hold it off as you need to be sociably acceptable, but you can’t hold it off forever, and you can’t expect couples and people everywhere to hold it off indefinitely because say they don’t want kids. It’s kind of cruel, don’t you think?
I don’t know what it says about asexuals, I really can’t say. I’m not going to say “OMG you’re missing out on this fun!” As that would be condescending. It would be nice not to not be concerned with “OMG these women should be strong proud honourable virgins!” as that is sort of condescending too.
I also support it because of equality. Equality for all. And while it is not the reason why, I am also sick of the ‘feminists’ who scream that being anti-abortion is automatically ‘anti-women’no matter what. Another example is a old secondary school friend of mine. She was born at roughly the same time as me (well, I was fourteen weeks early, her a month), and she weighed even less than me, and has/had worse eyesight (well, I was born blind and she could see, but hers became worse than mine from a very young age) and she made it through as well, she did those things as well. Babies are strong. There would still be ways to live. Everyone deserves a life unless they ruin the life of another. If you have that attitude, what does that say for deafblind children, or children/adults who cannot look after themselves at all (due to a mental condition or underdevelopment). And even when it comes to criminals, I still think they deserve the right to books and art (my government recently tried to ban both). It sounds cheesy, these stories, I know, but real life can be like that sometimes.
Well, then that would be her fault, and if that were the situation, I would hope I was given a better home. Yes, abuse is disgusting no matter what, but many people have risen above such a thing. Again, they chose to have sex. The intelligent and most responsible thing would be to do that, but I know not everyone can resist lust. She is just selfish if she tries to get rid of it if or when it happens.
Of course I do. And while I know I cannot help them all, if I can at least give one, or two (I would still feel horrible about the children I’ve left behind) a good, loving home, I will had made some difference, even if it is so insignificant and will make no difference over all. It is because people are too selfish to adopt. Yes, you are free to have children the biological way, but I just wish people would consider adopting more. And besides, what’s to stop someone having a child biologically and from adoption. They are just as much your children. Your real parents are those who raise you. ‘Adopted’ should not be a prefix. I’m saying this because I’ve noticed they always separate children in those categories when naming them.
I know of this too, you know.He can walk away, just like the woman can give the child to someone else to raise. However, I am not being sexist here, as he’s is as much of a selfish prick as it would be with the genders the other way around. It takes two to tango, as they say.
Miscarriage is not on purpose, as you just stated. You cannot choose to miscarry. It is a tragic part of nature.
Ok, that is a point, and makes sense.
Urgh. They are not ‘being an ass’. Sure, they are letting themselves get carried away with that natural lust, but it is not evil. Because the man is not penetrated, the man’s body does not change so much. That’s not to say I don’t think lesbians can’t be raped, even if they used a dildo (but you’re kind of bisexual, then). Most men don’t feel pain either, whereas as a woman’s body to needs adjust to something being in there (yes, I know that some woman feel no pain, or have masturbated beforehand, but then you’re a non-virgin anyway). Yes, I know that you can tighten right back up afterwards if you don’t do it again for a while, but it does not change what has happened. I’m not saying that in a sexist way. I’m just saying that sex a big step in life (for men as well) and people treat it as if it is nothing. It can signal a commitment, it can result in the creation of new life, it can make you feel like a different person. Again, I’m not saying that applies to all, but those people who don’t feel even the slightest bit different are in denial.
Again, I never said it was not. Mind you, I tend to judge the severity of a physical or mental violation by how painful it is or what kinds of affects it had on the person’s mind, so I know that does not apply to all.
No, it is hypocrisy. Saying that one man can do all this stuff with you and another suddenly can’t because he’s no that man is hypocrisy because she has already done all that stuff, and it would make no difference doing it again. No, it is hypocrisy. Again, as I said, it makes the trauma no less real, but it is not for those reasons. It is her realising how foolish she was and how she cannot go back to the way things were before (no, not in regards to second partner, but her taking the step too early). She still deserves all the comfort and help she needs. Again, as she made a commitment to someone, as well as violating her, that person is violating her commitment to that person, and if that person were to reject her afterwards, she or he would be almost as bad as the rapist. I say the same for those sick cunts who break up with someone or dump them because they were raped and therefore ‘someone got there first’. That ‘first’ was not her choice. And it was not really a first in the first place, as she did not consent.
Yes, I did, but that person still rushed in too fast, most likely. Some relationships just don’t work out, and that is a sad thing (I mean that truly, as all that love and connections ended up for naught because something happened). If someone wants to date a girl (or a guy) who has been with another, all the power to them, they are strong people, but it still hypocritical to claim cheating, even if it wasn’t the claimer’s fault that the relationship failed, as she already made a commitment to another. All of these people are pretty good examples as well, as well those DA stamps and whatnot. I haven’t had sex with him. It is still be no less sad, but I have not handled my body over to someone else (no, we don’t do the ‘I belong to you and you belong to me’ nonsense).
Yes, people make it in issue, a selfish issues. Incest and rape are not selfish reasons, even if it is still unfair to the new life. There is no hypocrisy or selfishness there.
“I also support it because of equality. Equality for all. And while it is not the reason why, I am also sick of the ‘feminists’ who scream that being anti-abortion is automatically ‘anti-women’no matter what. Another example is a old secondary school friend of mine. She was born at roughly the same time as me (well, I was fourteen weeks early, her a month), and she weighed even less than me, and has/had worse eyesight (well, I was born blind and she could see, but hers became worse than mine from a very young age) and she made it through as well, she did those things as well. Babies are strong. “
While it is good that your friend also made it through, unfortunately not all babies are strong
There are positive outcomes, there are negative outcomes, and each case is individual.
“There would still be ways to live. Everyone deserves a life unless they ruin the life of another. If you have that attitude, what does that say for deafblind children, or children/adults who cannot look after themselves at all (due to a mental condition or underdevelopment). And even when it comes to criminals, I still think they deserve the right to books and art (my government recently tried to ban both). It sounds cheesy, these stories, I know, but real life can be like that sometimes.”
If I were talking about being simply blind alone, or deaf alone, it wouldn’t be so much of an issue. But blind as well as deaf? As well as being unable to walk? How much disability can an individual put up with? What if the kid was going to get cancer and would have a short life with nothing but pain?
“Well, then that would be her fault, and if that were the situation, I would hope I was given a better home. Yes, abuse is disgusting no matter what, but many people have risen above such a thing.
Again, they chose to have sex. The intelligent and most responsible thing would be to do that, but I know not everyone can resist lust. She is just selfish if she tries to get rid of it if or when it happens.”
It is far less selfish to stop something born before it can even feel pain than to bring a life into the world where it will know nothing but. She shouldn’t have gotten pregnant yes, but sometimes abortion is a kinder alternative.
“Of course I do. And while I know I cannot help them all, if I can at least give one, or two (I would still feel horrible about the children I’ve left behind) a good, loving home, I will had made some difference, even if it is so insignificant and will make no difference over all. It is because people are too selfish to adopt. Yes, you are free to have children the biological way, but I just wish people would consider adopting more. And besides, what’s to stop someone having a child biologically and from adoption. They are just as much your children. Your real parents are those who raise you. ‘Adopted’ should not be a prefix. I’m saying this because I’ve noticed they always separate children in those categories when naming them.”
This is true.
“Miscarriage is not on purpose, as you just stated. You cannot choose to miscarry. It is a tragic part of nature.”
Point being just because something is natural does not always make it so great. Caesareans are sometimes done to save the life of a baby. Are they natural?
“Urgh. They are not ‘being an ass’. Sure, they are letting themselves get carried away with that natural lust, but it is not evil.”
Okay, harassment is not “evil evil” but it’s still bad. A person can be sued if they do that. Besides, you don’t want someone you don’t care for deciding to try copping a feel from you, do you?
“Because the man is not penetrated, the man’s body does not change so much. That’s not to say I don’t think lesbians can’t be raped, even if they used a dildo (but you’re kind of bisexual, then).”
…..Rape however is evil.
“Most men don’t feel pain either, whereas as a woman’s body to needs adjust to something being in there (yes, I know that some woman feel no pain, or have masturbated beforehand, but then you’re a non-virgin anyway). Yes, I know that you can tighten right back up afterwards if you don’t do it again for a while, but it does not change what has happened. I’m not saying that in a sexist way. I’m just saying that sex a big step in life (for men as well) and people treat it as if it is nothing. It can signal a commitment, it can result in the creation of new life, it can make you feel like a different person. Again, I’m not saying that applies to all, but those people who don’t feel even the slightest bit different are in denial.”
Why does this “change” matter in regards to harassment or rape?
“Again, I never said it was not. Mind you, I tend to judge the severity of a physical or mental violation by how painful it is or what kinds of affects it had on the person’s mind, so I know that does not apply to all.”
While there are different situations that should be treated differently, this can get abused.
“No, it is hypocrisy. Saying that one man can do all this stuff with you and another suddenly can’t because he’s no that man is hypocrisy because she has already done all that stuff, and it would make no difference doing it again. No, it is hypocrisy. Again, as I said, it makes the trauma no less real, but it is not for those reasons. It is her realising how foolish she was and how she cannot go back to the way things were before (no, not in regards to second partner, but her taking the step too early).”
I do not think that is what her problem would be. That is what your problem is, and yours alone because for some reason you’re placing a lot of value into being a virgin and whether a person is rushing into a sex or not, it shouldn’t matter. No-one cares except for the odd religious nut. You know why? A woman’s body is her own. It is not hypocrisy to complain about getting raped, because what she did was never wrong in the first place, because it’s her body, and her right to do with it what she wants. She could be the next Paris Hilton but it would still be her body and her right.
For some reason you really “dislike” this change from having sex or think it is really immoral. Yeah, there might be a difference afterwards, but it’s not bad thing. You think it’s so bad, life after sex, and that the way things “were before” is so much better? I think you’re afraid of change, or at least that change. And for what? What do you THINK would happen if, for some odd reason, you did have consensual sex? I know you’re asexual, but say someone slipped you an aphrodisiac. You had an operation on your brain, whatever, just flex your imagination a bit. Humour me. You did it, the next morning, you go to the doctor, and you caught nothing after some tests. You didn’t become pregnant. What then? What different sort of person would you become?
“She still deserves all the comfort and help she needs. “
Yes she does.
“Again, as she made a commitment to someone, as well as violating her, that person is violating her commitment to that person, and if that person were to reject her afterwards, she or he would be almost as bad as the rapist. I say the same for those sick cunts who break up with someone or dump them because they were raped and therefore ‘someone got there first’. That ‘first’ was not her choice. And it was not really a first in the first place, as she did not consent.”
It would be wrong.
“Yes, I did, but that person still rushed in too fast, most likely. Some relationships just don’t work out, and that is a sad thing (I mean that truly, as all that love and connections ended up for naught because something happened). If someone wants to date a girl (or a guy) who has been with another, all the power to them, they are strong people, but it still hypocritical to claim cheating, even if it wasn’t the claimer’s fault that the relationship failed, as she already made a commitment to another. “
Cheating is bad not because it’s hypocritical, it’s bad because your partner wants you to love him or her. A person might have not had any partners before. Like you, you might not have had any partner before your BF. But if you went out and kissed someone while you agreed to be with him, you’d be cheating. If he went out and kissed a girl at the moment, he’d be cheating on you. If you however kissed someone before you even knew your BF, it wouldn’t be cheating. If you kiss your BF, you’re not cheating on your previous partner, because it would be over between you and that person. On the odd chance you have cheated on your BF, if he decided to kiss someone, he’s still be wrong, as he would be no better than you, (but you would also be in the wrong in the first place). If there is one thing that is hypocritical in this world, it is revenge.
“I haven’t had sex with him. It is still be no less sad, but I have not handled my body over to someone else (no, we don’t do the ‘I belong to you and you belong to me’ nonsense).”
I also forgot to mention a bit in regards to pregnancy - what if my allergies or conditions were to be passed down as well? I know they say it's fifty percent, but it's still fifty percent. If my child had those conditions, it would be all my fault. Yes, that child might be able to live life normally despite them, but I would still feel guilty that they had them.
Oh, silly me there. I meant to say that I/she was born fourteen weeks/a month early. No child could survive that early. Yes, you are right, and if those negative things happen, that is life, and we must mourn. However, even babies have the survival instinct. Ok, it seems to only manifest as 'if I make enough noise, someone will help me', but a sick infant will still want to survive. Ah, I saw a documentary about those twins. At least the parents gave them the chance. There is always exceptions.
We have charities over here for deafblind children. They can learn braille, explore the world through touch, have sensory toys. Those people can still enjoy life even if they cannot look after themselves. If they want to, on their own terms, die because it is too much for them, that is a whole different topic, but it is the decision and thoughts of the that person and that person alone who decides whether he or she likes his or her life.
Again, it is the person's choice whether their live is good or not.
I'm glad you think so.
But a C-section is not selfish, as you stated. Yes, we can all be selfish at times, but there is a level limit. For example, wishing to entertain ourselves, and asking for books, or technology, or whatever resources for it can be considered selfish. And there is always the survival instinct again, which can appear in negative ways. Yes, we thankfully have people who are dedicated to saving the life of others, but if a situation is really dire, we most likely will do anything we can to preserve ourselves.
Of course.
Again, of course.
She can just ignored it.
No, no, as I said to another person, you can be in a heterosexual, sexually-active relationship and still be feminist. Most married women are non-virigins, I know it is rare to become pregnant on the first attempt, etc. There is just a difference between 'meaningful sex' and 'throwing yourself at someone because you are letting lust control you'. I place a value on it in regards to romance and marriage because it makes sense. Again, people assume it for religious reasons. That's not the only reason, I've shown and observed. It is not fully 'her body' if she has given herself to another. Virgins have someone to lose (no, I am not saying rape is bad for the loss of virginity, but the heinous crime of someone taking and violating her body). A heterosexually non-virgin female does not have anything to violate unless she is engaged or married. She can sleep with as many or as few people she wants, but that does mean she can deny people the right to avoid her or have an opinion on her.
No, I don't think it's bad. I'm just saying there is some kind of change, no matter how small, and I (and I'm not the only one) just wishes people would be more careful and realize that it can only happen once. You can only give that gift to one person. And most people don't want it for 'religious' reasons. Well, I would be a mother. I would not let that define me as a woman, but I know I would do my damnest to make sure they have a good life. The bit I would be terrified over would be the childbirth. I know it is natural, but I would also worry this tiny body of mine could not take it (I don't think I'm 'weak' as that is anti-feminist, as I am will fight and protect myself if needed), but that, along with the shit my mother went through with both me and my brother, doesn't exactly give me confidence, and she's of average height and no medical conditions to speak of. I would get a C-section. And I would hope Matt would be there to help. I know he would not abandon me.
Again, of course. It would be disgusting. Not to mention it just piles on to the suffering the victim already had. And not forgetting how much courage and trust it takes for someone to confess such a thing.
Well, I would not, as I respect him. Oh, I should say, I do not think sex is the ultimate commitment, as I hope implied (but implied the former there). No, it just because someone is 'in the past' it does not chance the fact that it happened it. That relationship failed, therefore, making what happened in it pointless. Yes, I believe former partners can be friends, but how can you be friends with someone you slept with? That is why I did not understand the whole 'friends with benefits' thing. You have been so very, very, close with that person. Yes, that second, or third (after that, you're just getting desperate), can be your 'one' (I do naively wish that our first adult relationships can be our 'ones', but life is cruel) but that person still cannot claim cheating. I in fact dislike those people who think 'we haven't done anything yet, he/she must not love me!', and I'm guessing I'm not the only one in that regard? But that's another thing casual sex has let to.
Well, as you said, I suppose the kissing would count.
“Oh, silly me there. I meant to say that I/she was born fourteen weeks/a month early. No child could survive that early. Yes, you are right, and if those negative things happen, that is life, and we must mourn. However, even babies have the survival instinct. Ok, it seems to only manifest as 'if I make enough noise, someone will help me', but a sick infant will still want to survive. Ah, I saw a documentary about those twins. At least the parents gave them the chance. There is always exceptions.
We have charities over here for deafblind children. They can learn braille, explore the world through touch, have sensory toys. Those people can still enjoy life even if they cannot look after themselves. If they want to, on their own terms, die because it is too much for them, that is a whole different topic, but it is the decision and thoughts of the that person and that person alone who decides whether he or she likes her life.
Again, it is the person's choice whether their live is good or not”
Yes, it is that person’s decision. Although in cases where someone severely ill and is also incompetent, and there is not much hope for the person recovering, and their decision to continue living or continue suffering is unknown, the decision to end a life is left up to the family. In the case of an unborn child, it is best left up to the mother, which would be the said family.
“But a C-section is not selfish, as you stated. Yes, we can all be selfish at times, but there is a level limit. For example, wishing to entertain ourselves, and asking for books, or technology, or whatever resources for it can be considered selfish. And there is always the survival instinct again, which can appear in negative ways. Yes, we thankfully have people who are dedicated to saving the life of others, but if a situation is really dire, we most likely will do anything we can to preserve ourselves.”
Yet you believe abortion is selfish. Yet it isn’t selfish if you want to stop or prevent someone suffering.
Murder is wrong and selfish. Ending a life in the case of euthanasia or self-defence, is not.
“She can just ignored it.”
And if someone off the street decided to try feeling your boobs, are you going to ignore it and let him continue?
“No, no, as I said to another person, you can be in a heterosexual, sexually-active relationship and still be feminist. Most married women are non-virigins, I know it is rare to become pregnant on the first attempt, etc. There is just a difference between 'meaningful sex' and 'throwing yourself at someone because you are letting lust control you'.”
There is also a lot of grey area in between.
“I place a value on it in regards to romance and marriage because it makes sense. Again, people assume it for religious reasons. That's not the only reason, I've shown and observed. It is not fully 'her body' if she has given herself to another. Virgins have someone to lose (no, I am not saying rape is bad for the loss of virginity, but the heinous crime of someone taking and violating her body). A heterosexually non-virgin female does not have anything to violate unless she is engaged or married. She can sleep with as many or as few people she wants, but that does mean she can deny people the right to avoid her or have an opinion on her.”
She does have something she has lost, same as a virgin, as you described above “the heinous crime of someone taking and violating her body” but why do you think this doesn’t happen to non-virgins?
Why do you think “it is not fully her body” and that “it’s given to another” so completely?
What evidence can you provide that a woman does, would or should have her rights to her own body lost, that any sort of enslavement, either physical, mental or otherwise, starts the moment she has any sort of sexual activity, whether in a commitment or outside of one?
“No, I don't think it's bad. I'm just saying there is some kind of change, no matter how small, and I (and I'm not the only one) just wishes people would be more careful and realize that it can only happen once. You can only give that gift to one person. And most people don't want it for 'religious' reasons.”
Yes, but to believe the change is so severe that it’s hypocrisy when a non-virgin complains about rape?
“Well, I would be a mother. I would not let that define me as a woman, but I know I would do my damnest to make sure they have a good life. The bit I would be terrified over would be the childbirth. I know it unnatural, but I would also worry this tiny body of mine could not take it (I don't think I'm 'weak' as that is anti-feminist, as I am will fight and protect myself if needed), but that, along with the shit my mother went through with both me and my brother, doesn't exactly give me confidence, and she's of average height and no medical conditions to speak of. I would get a C-section. And I would hope Matt would be there to help. I know he would not abandon me.”
Yes, but what if you HAD sex, but DIDN’T become pregnant? Next day, go to doctor, no STD’s, no pregnancy. What would happen to you, do you think?
“Again, of course. It would be disgusting. Not to mention it just piles on to the suffering the victim already had. And not forgetting how much courage and trust it takes for someone to confess such a thing.”
Indeed
“Oh, I should say, I do not think sex is the ultimate commitment, as I hope implied (but implied the former there).
No, it just because someone is 'in the past' it does not chance the fact that it happened it. That relationship failed, therefore, making what happened in it pointless.”
I’m not saying former relationships end up being pointless or that it never happened. I’m saying what a person does in previous relationships doesn’t have any bearing on future ones in regards to cheating.
“Yes, I believe former partners can be friends, but how can you be friends with someone you slept with? That is why I did not understand the whole 'friends with benefits' thing. You have been so very, very, close with that person. Yes, that second, or third (after that, you're just getting desperate), can be your 'one' (I do naively wish that our first adult relationships can be our 'ones', but life is cruel) but that person still cannot claim cheating.”
I guess you’d have to ask someone who has slept with someone for that. It does happen though and it simply doesn’t affect other people the same it does with others.
“I in fact dislike those people who think 'we haven't done anything yet, he/she must not love me!', and I'm guessing I'm not the only one in that regard? But that's another thing casual sex has let to.”
You’re the only person I know of that considers what a person does before a relationship qualifies as cheating.
Why do you dislike them?
“Well, as you said, I suppose the kissing would count.”
Yep.
“I also forgot to mention a bit in regards to pregnancy - what if my allergies or conditions were to be passed down as well? I know they say it's fifty percent, but it's still fifty percent. If my child had those conditions, it would be all my fault. Yes, that child might be able to live life normally despite them, but I would still feel guilty that they had them.”
I dread the thought of having a child myself. It’s times like that I consider getting my tubes tied. But I’m forever alone anyway so why worry? But I asked you to stretch your imagination, so I’ll stretch mine in return.
If I had a child that had the same problems that I or my family has, or I passed on some disability, I’d have to live with that guilt. It would eat away it me, I guess, but there will be ways in life to deal with that guilt. In guess one way would be to channel it into helping the child cope with whatever problem it gets. If the guilt got too severe, I would have to seek help as I would not only have to look after my own well-being but the well-being of the kid who would depend on me, and I would have to realise this.
For the first one, yes. However, just out of curiosity, what is your opinion in regards to comas? Or permanent comas? It is true in some cases that the person can hear. No. That child has yet to even begins its life. It deserves a chance, not to be murdered by some heartless cow. The father, if willing, can take the child, or again, it can be given to another family. Just as the mother can keep the child if the father is a heartless bastard.
But again, you don’t know if that person will suffer. And that person who wants to end that life again was a foetus once. Euthanasia is the choice of the person wishing it unless they cannot give consent, then indeed it is the choice of the family. That foetus has yet to begin life in the real world. Again, unless the pregnancy could cause the mother’s death, or it was the result of rape, there is no reason to abort.
That is different. That is physical. Words from a stranger who knows nothing of you can be ignored.
Because she already gave herself to someone. Yes, she will suffer physically because that attacker obviously cares nothing for her, or sometimes, does not know what they are doing (it can happen, but the attacker would still be at fault), but she is not losing anything physically. Well, because sex, for women, tends to be more about emotions than physical thing (again, women who can be completely without emotions is a cold being), and due to the way sex works, she be very open and exposed to her partner, male or female. It is not slavery within commitment. Yes, I know sex is about lust, but again, it can be romantic in a committed relationship. But again, casual sex, swingers, BDSM, exist.
It’s not ‘severe’, that’s too harsh a word. Again, she already let another take he, and there being another, unless she is engaged or married, makes no difference in the long run. Her mind however, is a different matter, as we know.
Well, I’d probably just think “Well, fuck.” As then I would to give myself those names and insults. I’m good at insulting myself, after all.
Well, it does to some people, including me. Some people (not for religious reasons) think that sex outside of marriage, even with the person they are going to marry is betraying their future husband/wife (or only husband, because we all know lesbians are just trying to get attention -_-) or not being the strength and respect to wait until they are wed. I’m not that extreme, especially in regards to the ‘with the same person part’ and the fiancé/fiance is just as guilty for that last part as well. Some people just don’t like someone having a ‘sexual past’ to thin about. And no, it’s not because they ‘worry they might not be good enough’, unlike most ‘feminists’ say (I’m not saying you think this, I’m just giving an example of such attitudes again). But other people are free to view such things however they like. To have our own opinions, no matter what, is a form of equality.
Again, I don’t dislike them. I don’t like the attitude and selfishness.
:Nod: .
Forever alone? Now, now, why would you say that? As sappy, pathetic, and naïve as this sounds, you will find someone. Yes, I dread to think that there are people who have existed that, no matter how much they tried, never found that speical someone, but no-one deserves to die alone. No-one. For some reason, I can even extend that to the lowest and sickest of criminals. Seeing their loved ones, if they have any, might just make them think before they lose cognitive thinking, die and go to hell. That’s a sick thing right? To think that they deserve someone so…kind. Don’t give up, please. …
Eh, um, sorry . I just get a little carried away when people have this opinion of themselves, given that I’m a pessimist. We don’t need more of our kind. People of that mind set are an expatriating lot.
Ah, so I could use my experiences to help them? How logical (not sarcsasm). I mean sure, they could be a whiney little, “But you’re not me! You don’t understaaaannnddd!” but I would do my best to dispel that attitude. But of course. I would never want to be in a situation where I could not look after them. Also, as…old fashioned, maybe a little anti-feminist as this sounds, if I could raise a child, adopted or biological, I will made another achievement – I would add to the people who prove that disabilities does not mean one cannot be a good parent.
But that’s a long, long time away, after lots of training and confidence building.
“For the first one, yes. However, just out of curiosity, what is your opinion in regards to comas? Or permanent comas? It is true in some cases that the person can hear.”
Depends if there’s a chance of recovering. If there is, then all the best for the person in the coma. If not, in the permanent case, what’s the point in keeping that person “alive”? The person is gone, all that’s left is a heart beating and a body working which is not really what defines as “life life” to me, not without the mind and/or soul.
“No. That child has yet to even begins its life. It deserves a chance, not to be murdered by some heartless cow. The father, if willing, can take the child, or again, it can be given to another family. Just as the mother can keep the child if the father is a heartless bastard.
But again, you don’t know if that person will suffer. And that person who wants to end that life again was a foetus once. Euthanasia is the choice of the person wishing it unless they cannot give consent, then indeed it is the choice of the family. That foetus has yet to begin life in the real world. Again, unless the pregnancy could cause the mother’s death, or it was the result of rape, there is no reason to abort.”
While I disagree, as I would include cases of severe illnesses, or would still find it worse to simply bring a life into the world and abandon it (few people are adopting at all) and/or worse (there are horrible parents out there), what am I going to do? I value quality of life, you value life. I will -try- for once not to go forcing my views down someone’s throat. Maybe agree to disagree.
“That is different. That is physical. Words from a stranger who knows nothing of you can be ignored.”
True to an extent. Have you practised this though?
“Because she already gave herself to someone. Yes, she will suffer physically because that attacker obviously cares nothing for her, or sometimes, does not know what they are doing (it can happen, but the attacker would still be at fault), but she is not losing anything physically. Well, because sex, for women, tends to be more about emotions than physical thing (again, women who can be completely without emotions is a cold being), and due to the way sex works, she be very open and exposed to her partner, male or female. It is not slavery within commitment. Yes, I know sex is about lust, but again, it can be romantic in a committed relationship. But again, casual sex, swingers, BDSM, exist.”
If you are referring to consent, if this is your evidence, consent is not “giving herself to someone”. No more than asking someone to scratch your back so you can get rid of an itch means you are giving yourself to that person (or scratching someone else’s back). There may be love involved, there may be not, but either way, she or he still owns themselves.
If you are referring to love, well again, this doesn’t necessarily involve sex, and a person is still owned by themselves. Having a BF you should know this.
Being open or exposed isn’t giving away a person’s body. Whether you mean getting naked (my doctor has already seen me heaps of times. He don’t own me) or opening yourself emotionally which doesn’t always occur sexually anyway (I’m open to my family and friends they don’t own me either).
No-one, short of a satanic ritual, gives themselves to anybody in this permanent basis you seem to think of.
“It’s not ‘severe’, that’s too harsh a word. Again, she already let another take he, and there being another, unless she is engaged or married, makes no difference in the long run. Her mind however, is a different matter, as we know.”
Not severe? “makes no difference?” Do even realise the gravity of what you say? Why so many people have been upset at you?
“Well, I’d probably just think “Well, fuck.” As then I would to give myself those names and insults. I’m good at insulting myself, after all.”
What insults? “weak”, “submissive”, “whore”… When in fact you’d just end up being like the rest of the human race who has sex for pleasure. Well I’m sorry if anyone doing it means becoming something you dislike but face it people are human.
“Well, it does to some people, including me. Some people (not for religious reasons) think that sex outside of marriage, even with the person they are going to marry is betraying their future husband/wife”
But the people who have sex are usually either in the belief they ARE having sex with the future spouse or don’t even have any plan to have a commitment ever.
“ (or only husband, because we all know lesbians are just trying to get attention -_-)”
Are you a supporter of LGBT or are you not?
“ or not being the strength and respect to wait until they are wed. I’m not that extreme, especially in regards to the ‘with the same person part’ and the fiancé/fiance is just as guilty for that last part as well. Some people just don’t like someone having a ‘sexual past’ to thin about. And no, it’s not because they ‘worry they might not be good enough’, unlike most ‘feminists’ say (I’m not saying you think this, I’m just giving an example of such attitudes again).”
Yeah people should wait. But once again, people are human.
“But other people are free to view such things however they like. To have our own opinions, no matter what, is a form of equality.”
We have our right to free speech, but we also have our right to live in a non-threatening environment.
“Forever alone? Now, now, why would you say that? As sappy, pathetic, and naïve as this sounds, you will find someone. Yes, I dread to think that there are people who have existed that, no matter how much they tried, never found that speical someone, but no-one deserves to die alone. No-one. For some reason, I can even extend that to the lowest and sickest of criminals. Seeing their loved ones, if they have any, might just make them think before they lose cognitive thinking, die and go to hell. That’s a sick thing right? To think that they deserve someone so…kind.
Don’t give up, please. …”
As touching as this is, I have to face facts; I dug my own grave here. This is what I get for spending my youth running around getting into people’s faces about how evil I thought sex was and how holier I was than everyone else. I was a little bigot and now I’m paying the price. Besides the one time I did have a BF I had to break up with him because I couldn’t put out and he wanted me to; he ended up taking it out on others by going out getting drunk and getting into fights, which scared me, but I realised I was being cruel; what was I going to do, continue on and marry him and on the wedding night refuse to do anything? Keep him in effect celibate for the rest of his life?
Anyway, I disgress. I am the one who has isolated myself. VERY much like you have begun to do so to yourself. That is why I am here. Change before you end up like me. This is not a threat, this is a warning.
“Eh, um, sorry . I just get a little carried away when people have this opinion of themselves, given that I’m a pessimist. We don’t need more of our kind. People of that mind set are an expatriating lot.”
Okay
“Ah, so I could use my experiences to help them? How logical (not sarcsasm). I mean sure, they could be a whiney little, “But you’re not me! You don’t understaaaannnddd!” but I would do my best to dispel that attitude. But of course. I would never want to be in a situation where I could not look after them. Also, as…old fashioned, maybe a little anti-feminist as this sounds, if I could raise a child, adopted or biological, I will made another achievement – I would add to the people who prove that disabilities does not mean one cannot be a good parent.
But that’s a long, long time away, after lots of training and confidence building.”
People should not discriminate those with disabilities as they have a right to be a parent as much as anyone, so long as they are a good parent and cause no harm.
Neither can them. Exactly. They were once that vulnerable, tiny life. They are basically saying that it is ok for them to be born, but if they were to chose to have and have the natural result of pregnancy, it is utterly and completely selfish for her to act like, “Oh, but I’m special, that baby will only be an inconvenience.” If their parents had not ‘allowed’ her to be born, she would not have been alive to be so selfish. Rape, incest and the mother’s life being in danger are the only viable, non-sexist, non-hypocritical, non-selfish reasons for an abortion.
Of course, I value quality of life. That is why I believe in that child deciding if their lives are good or not. Most children can tell if they are being abused. In addition, people don’t adopt as they do not bother to even consider it. As I said, there is nothing with wanting a child the biological way, but no one even considers adoption, even when having trouble getting pregnancy. They go through all the expensive IVF and whatnot before him for such reasons as ‘wanting the sensation of pregnancy’, a ‘child to carry on my blood’. Very well then. This is a detersive topic. I am just sick of the selfishness and ‘you are against abortion?! MISOGYNIST! ANTI-FEMINIST!” attitudes.
I do my best, but we all have a point where we can take no more. Yes, it’s hypocritical, but we are all hypocrites. If some person were to proposition me, or yell out someone sexual, I would just say something such as, “I’m a virgin and happy about it, thank you very much” and walk on. Sex is unlike any act in the world. It can be compared to nothing. I was not saying that sex equals love. I just believe that is an intimate thing that should be between two people engaged/married people (are they are now lawfully committed rather than just officially in their eyes) who love each other and them alone.
No, but the nakedness and design of sex means, weather she thinks so or not, a woman is very exposed and under the guidance of a man. I do not think there does not exist men who are just as nervous in that area, or that all girls are shy and terrified when it comes to sex, but the man is not the one allowing someone of the opposite gender inside their body, to have complete access to their body (yes, men allow that too, but it is not as much a woman does).
I simply understand what being two-faced and pompous is, thinking one is better than this person is even though they have already thrown themselves at another. Acting as if they have someone to preserve, something to keep, something to protect. I have my body to protect and honour. I look after it; I will never it up give it to anyone.
Yes, but if I did not, I would be acting as if it is difference simply because I am me. That would be an incredibly arrogant thing to do.
Unless they are engaged or married, they obviously went in too soon. Even if they don’t plan to have a commitment even though they are having se as a woman, again, they are rather heartless. Yes, not everyone wants to fall in love or get married, but if so, don’t go doing the very thing that is supposed to be a private thing between two committed people.
I am for them, of course. I’m not some intolerant cunt. I was simply showing the type of attitudes homophobes display. It is sometimes hard to convey vocal tones in writing, so I hoped the emote would show that. Sorry for the confusion.
True, true. Some just have more willpower than others do.
Yes, but that’s never going to happen. We can reduce it was much as possible, but as there will always exist someone to brainwash the next generation, who will then past it onto those after them, that will never be.
You were expressing your opinion and there is nothing wrong with that. If people want to choose to be offended at someone’s opinion on their choice, that is their problem, not yours. However, I do not think sex is ‘evil’. Virgins are better when so many girls are throwing that gift away at such a young age and outside lawful, complete commitment. If most girls were preserving themselves and being intelligent enough to know when it is good to do that, then it would not be so special. Well, then, he was a prick. It’s not as if you were the first to be put in that position. You might one day find someone else with similar views. You sound young (not young young, but twenty-something) so it’s not as if you are running out of time.
However, even if I did not have a boyfriend, I would not care, as I don’t need to be in a relationship to be happy. Other people would just assume that it is because of my views and that would be their brainwashed opinion. He does not really care for sex. He loves me because I am strong, self-respecting, booze and drug free woman. Of course, we have a lot in common as well. Some of our opposites even compliment (hence why opposites attract sometimes). Yes, like most couples, we do argue every now and then or get annoyed at sometimes (he gets annoyed at my paranoia at other people’s opinions and I hate how messy he is, for example), but we know we will always get along.
Well, just like with other intolerances, it will always happen.
“I do my best, but we all have a point where we can take no more. Yes, it’s hypocritical, but we are all hypocrites. If some person were to proposition me, or yell out someone sexual, I would just say something such as, “I’m a virgin and happy about it, thank you very much” and walk on.”
Depends on the person, everybody is different in regards to how much they can take.
“Sex is unlike any act in the world. It can be compared to nothing.
I was not saying that sex equals love. I just believe that is an intimate thing that should be between two people engaged/married people (are they are now lawfully committed rather than just officially in their eyes) who love each other and them alone.”
Not everyone has this belief though. Not that they believe people who are married shouldn’t love/ have sex, just that it doesn’t necessarily have to be strictly within that marriage. Heck, there are some people who don’t even believe in marriage. Of course you have your beliefs if that’s what you want to do (save for marriage etc) that’s all good. But when someone else does different to what you do, who are you to condemn them?
“No, but the nakedness and design of sex means, weather she thinks so or not, a woman is very exposed and under the guidance of a man. I do not think there does not exist men who are just as nervous in that area, or that all girls are shy and terrified when it comes to sex, but the man is not the one allowing someone of the opposite gender inside their body, to have complete access to their body (yes, men allow that too, but it is not as much a woman does).”
Why not as much as a woman does? Why would that give her less rights over her body as a man? Why are men allowed to do whatever while women have to be all pure and proper, just because of this? Why should women who choose to have sex in spite of this be condemned to abuse?
“I simply understand what being two-faced and pompous is, thinking one is better than this person”
And you don’t think you’re better than non-virgins because you are a virgin? Weren’t you going around calling non-virgins a string of insults? You weren’t thinking you were better because you’re not “weak” “slutty” “brainwashed” etc….
“ is even though they have already thrown themselves at another.”
This doesn’t mean they should have to put up with rape. They don’t even do it to be pompous or because they think they are better or whatever. They have sex because they like someone.
“Acting as if they have someone to preserve, something to keep, something to protect.”
There are things to protect beyond virginity. As much as it is your right to keep to yourself, but with the way you put a fuss over those that don’t, why do you feel a woman has to protect virginity so much, why do you think that’s ALL a woman needs to protect and be upset over? Why do you feel you have to? A lot of people don’t care about virginity, why should you? Maybe this thing YOU feel the need to preserve and protect isn’t as valuable as you think it is.
“I have my body to protect and honour. I look after it; I will never it up give it to anyone.”
No-one’s going to steal your body. Sans body-snatchers, if they exist. Or demons. (don't demons actually PREFER harassing virgins?)
“Yes, but if I did not, I would be acting as if it is difference simply because I am me. That would be an incredibly arrogant thing to do.”
Well yeah that is true. But the point was, why give out those insults to anyone at all, even yourself? It’s like a homophobic person who is also gay throwing out insults to himself and others as well. But the question is why does he want to insult people who are homosexual? Why do you feel the need to insult non-virgins?
Anyway you answered my question of what you think would happen to you after sex. You pointed out you would insult yourself. Is this what you feel the need to protect and honour? How you would not feel weak or slutty? Is this why you value virginity so much, just so you’re not these things?
“Unless they are engaged or married, they obviously went in too soon.”
It’s up to the parties involved to decide what is right for themselves.
“Even if they don’t plan to have a commitment even though they are having se as a woman, again, they are rather heartless. Yes, not everyone wants to fall in love or get married, but if so, don’t go doing the very thing that is supposed to be a private thing between two committed people.”
Why are they heartless for doing what is by most regarded an act of affection, whether in a commitment or not? Why should they not have sex just because they don’t want to get married? It’s their bodies after all.
“I am for them, of course. I’m not some intolerant cunt. I was simply showing the type of attitudes homophobes display. It is sometimes hard to convey vocal tones in writing, so I hoped the emote would show that. Sorry for the confusion.”
Uhhh, okay.
“True, true. Some just have more willpower than others do.”
Or simply less libido, and had less of a challenge than others.
“Yes, but that’s never going to happen. We can reduce it was much as possible, but as there will always exist someone to brainwash the next generation, who will then past it onto those after them, that will never be. “
Who’s brainwashing who?
“You were expressing your opinion and there is nothing wrong with that. If people want to choose to be offended at someone’s opinion on their choice, that is their problem, not yours. However, I do not think sex is ‘evil’. Virgins are better when so many girls are throwing that gift away at such a young age and outside lawful, complete commitment. If most girls were preserving themselves and being intelligent enough to know when it is good to do that, then it would not be so special.”
It was not a matter of expressing an opinion it was shoving my opinion down everybody’s throats, which isn’t a very nice thing to do. Nasty habit of mine, I need to break it. No-one cares if someone’s a virgin or not, just don’t go telling people what they should or shouldn’t do with their bodies. It’s wrong.
“However, even if I did not have a boyfriend, I would not care, as I don’t need to be in a relationship to be happy. Other people would just assume that it is because of my views and that would be their brainwashed opinion. He does not really care for sex. He loves me because I am strong, self-respecting, booze and drug free woman. Of course, we have a lot in common as well. Some of our opposites even compliment (hence why opposites attract sometimes). Yes, like most couples, we do argue every now and then or get annoyed at sometimes (he gets annoyed at my paranoia at other people’s opinions and I hate how messy he is, for example), but we know we will always get along."
I don’t think people would assume that simply because of your “unique” views. A lot of people feel they don’t need to be in a relationship to be happy. Not everyone out there is some brainwashed force
“Well, just like with other intolerances, it will always happen.”
People should try to try and stop it though I guess
Indeed, but some people just oversensitive or lack a spine.
You can love without marriage. The marriage would even happen if there was no love, obviously. I’ not ‘waiting’ for marriage. That implies I’m going to jump my spouse the moment the reception is over. Even in marriage, I would not want to do that. Even a marriage can work without sex. If people don’t believe in marriage, that is their belief. It’s my opinion. People are so loose nowadays. Ok, I know not everyone, even when in a relationship, fuck like rabbits, but sex used to be such a private thing. Even in times before a brothel was seen as more respectable (for both parties).
She still has rights to her body, but must understand that she shared it with another person. I just explained why. I explained that too. The physical, biological, emotional/mental differences along with the differing results or connotations. It is not ‘abuse’. It is opinion. If she’s does not like me, maybe she should not have been so loose.
As I said, I and other virgins are better as so many girls are going around losing it so young and then (unsurprizingly) that relationship ends at some point, be it after a short or long period, or just losing it in casual sex. If most women (or men) were a little more in control or respectful of themselves, it would be nothing special as, well, it would be a common thing. That is not the case and it never has been.
‘Put up with rape’? While I do not think, it is the worst thing to happen as I said, (things such as murder, genocide, child/animal cruelty and torture are worse to me). They are, as again, it was perfectly ok for that boyfriend or one night stand to be with her, but this man, oh no, she’s much too pure and ‘could do better’ even though it would not change her in the slightest (unless she got an STD, but she made the choice) if that man was inside her as well.
I know our lives, our livelihood, our loved ones, all those good things. I wouldn't not ‘put up such a fuss’ if they did not shove their non-virginity in everyone’s faces while claiming how ‘liberated’ and demanding that no one have an opinion on her reckless actions or they are The Big Three of insults (‘sexist’, ‘misogynist’, ‘oppressive), and then they turn around and shame men for looking at them sexually, or wanting an opinion on the life of their child. No, as I said. Just like a woman, a woman, if so ‘liberated’ and ‘strong’, should protect her life, her job, her loved ones. I’m sure there are others, but they are the ones that popped into my mind. As I said, their attitudes affect and all proper feminists, by giving us a bad name. Not to mention they make people think if you are a feminist, you are out there shagging anyone you fancy. It also affects me and other feminists who actually care about men, because of the above mentioned sexism.
Ok, sarcastic or not I did laugh at that a little. A little off topic, but I’ve never understood the ‘virgin sacrifice’ thing. Why would a demon want someone who would be scared and not do any— oh, wait, that is what they want.
Because I would be one of them, and as I said, if I acted like I was a special case or different from anyone else, then as I said, that would be incredibility arrogant and egotistical.
One of the reasons, but also I, because I am glad I am not part of that common crowd. Yes, that sounds egotistical and arrogant, but I refer you to my reasoning above (sorry for the repeat, but you asked the question – I don’t mean that rudely). I’m pretty sure that, when I go to hell, rape is going to be my first punishment. Plus, I have no interest in having sex. Ever.
Very well, but there would still be a reason, and all that supposedly loving sex would be for naught.
How is it ‘affectionate’ when it is outside a relationship and purely about carnal desires? As I said, sex can be romantic in a relationship.
Challenge?
Intolerant adults, who were most likely got their racism, or sexism, or homophobia, or fundamentalism from another adult who insisted that in them as a child or teenager, or even as an adult, and will pass it on to the following generation.
I’m not doing that though. It’s not as if I am starting it on something unrelated. IF someone expresses their opinion in a public place or on the internet, especially when it full of double standards, sexism (against both genders) hypocrisy, or selfishness, some people will express a negative opinion. I can’t help if so many women are so insecure and don’t want to take responsibility and be treated the same as men in a world of supposed equality.
Some people do, as I told other people. I’ve seen it myself. And they have good (non-religious, non-sexist, but self-respecting reason). Again, I’m doing that either, I’m just saying they think, and while others are of course allowed an opinon on it, it is somewhat meaningless when they rely on assumptions of ‘I was raped/molested/dumped’ a ‘religious nut’, ‘insane’, ‘repressed’ and what have you.
Again, I said that, but that doesn’t mean it is ok for them to go around throwing themselves at anyone. That is disgusting.
“Indeed, but some people just oversensitive or lack a spine.”
Some people are. But it all depends on different people. Even you yourself would have your limits.
“You can love without marriage. The marriage would even happen if there was no love, obviously. I’ not ‘waiting’ for marriage. That implies I’m going to jump my spouse the moment the reception is over. Even in marriage, I would not want to do that. Even a marriage can work without sex. If people don’t believe in marriage, that is their belief. It’s my opinion. People are so loose nowadays. Ok, I know not everyone, even when in a relationship, fuck like rabbits, but sex used to be such a private thing. Even in times before a brothel was seen as more respectable (for both parties).”
Yes people are. And why not? There is becoming less and less reason for restraint aside from either STD’s and/ or pregnancy (solved via contraceptives etc) or religious reasons (not your issue but usually others). It feels good so why not?
“She still has rights to her body, but must understand that she shared it with another person. I just explained why. I explained that too. The physical, biological, emotional/mental differences along with the differing results or connotations. It is not ‘abuse’. It is opinion. If she’s does not like me, maybe she should not have been so loose.”
So she’s different so she should be treated different? And you see nothing at all wrong with that mindset? It is a lot like how racist or sexist or homophobic people think, after all.
You explained how you felt about sex and how you would feel vulnerable and exposed. Maybe some girls feel that way, but it isn’t universal, and it’s NOT a good reason for women to be treated different.
Like, what if your mindset was reversed? Eg. Never mind that guys take a risk when having sex. Ever heard of coitus captivus? Ever noticed how protective men are when it comes to their balls? It’s a lot safer to have your organs on the inside rather than the outside (which is why your brain is inside a skull). I guess they are more vulnerable when it comes to sex. Maybe I should start believing I can go around having sex and THEY should stay pure and proper. Maybe MEN can’t be the ones who can claim cheating while it’s okay for woman to screw whoever they want. Maybe it’s the men who are worse off for allowing a woman access to their bodies. Think the above is a load of nonsense? So do I, because it shouldn’t matter who’s vulnerable or exposed or who’s penetrated or not or whatever, any more than it shouldn’t matter whether a person is black or white. Men and woman should be treated equally.
Like, you’re a female, do you wanted to be treated different? Wouldn’t you prefer it if you were allowed to do the same things guys can do?
“As I said, I and other virgins are better as so many girls are going around losing it so young and then (unsurprizingly) that relationship ends at some point, be it after a short or long period, or just losing it in casual sex. If most women (or men) were a little more in control or respectful of themselves, it would be nothing special as, well, it would be a common thing. That is not the case and it never has been.”
You think you’re better than others, don’t you think this is a bit pompous?
“‘Put up with rape’? While I do not think, it is the worst thing to happen as I said, (things such as murder, genocide, child/animal cruelty and torture are worse to me). They are, as again, it was perfectly ok for that boyfriend or one night stand to be with her, but this man, oh no, she’s much too pure and ‘could do better’ even though it would not change her in the slightest (unless she got an STD, but she made the choice) if that man was inside her as well.”
You seriously don’t get why a girl would say no to one guy after she yes to another, even though others have tried to explain to you why? Then again, I suppose it’s like explaining the sense of taste to someone who was born without a tongue. Who can only consider why someone would refuse to eat something is because of how they would look.
“I know our lives, our livelihood, our loved ones, all those good things. I wouldn't not ‘put up such a fuss’ if they did not shove their non-virginity in everyone’s faces while claiming how ‘liberated’ and demanding that no one have an opinion on her reckless actions or they are The Big Three of insults (‘sexist’, ‘misogynist’, ‘oppressive), and then they turn around and shame men for looking at them sexually, or wanting an opinion on the life of their child. No, as I said. Just like a woman, a woman, if so ‘liberated’ and ‘strong’, should protect her life, her job, her loved ones. I’m sure there are others, but they are the ones that popped into my mind. As I said, their attitudes affect and all proper feminists, by giving us a bad name. Not to mention they make people think if you are a feminist, you are out there shagging anyone you fancy. It also affects me and other feminists who actually care about men, because of the above mentioned sexism.”
Yet you’re going to other people’s discussions and waving your virginity in their faces. How are you any better?
“Ok, sarcastic or not I did laugh at that a little. A little off topic, but I’ve never understood the ‘virgin sacrifice’ thing. Why would a demon want someone who would be scared and not do any— oh, wait, that is what they want.”
Ha ha.
“Because I would be one of them, and as I said, if I acted like I was a special case or different from anyone else, then as I said, that would be incredibility arrogant and egotistical.”
Ah, you don’t want to be “one of them”, I see. Although I do not see why you don’t see anything wrong with that line of thinking.
“One of the reasons, but also I, because I am glad I am not part of that common crowd. Yes, that sounds egotistical and arrogant, but I refer you to my reasoning above (sorry for the repeat, but you asked the question – I don’t mean that rudely).”
But if you recognise it is arrogant, why still be like that? I can see why being a “sheep” appears bad but at the same time, “when in Rome, you do as the Romans do”, and considering this society, you’re more likely to get by by tolerating people whether or not they are virgin.
“I’m pretty sure that, when I go to hell, rape is going to be my first punishment.”
Naaah. Might want to watch out what you get reincarnated as though. If you believe in that.
“Plus, I have no interest in having sex. Ever.”
That’s what I used to say before I found out I was anaemic and had that cured. EDIT aka it might for all you know be due to a medical condition
You know what they say; pride comes before a fall.
“Very well, but there would still be a reason, and all that supposedly loving sex would be for naught.”
Sometimes.
“How is it ‘affectionate’ when it is outside a relationship and purely about carnal desires? As I said, sex can be romantic in a relationship.”
It is unlikely for a person to have sex with someone without feeling some degree of attachment or attraction to said person. They’re not going to have sex with someone they consider unlikeable or would hate (sans rapists, but they’re horrible anyway and shouldn’t be considered normal). Even the one night standers are going to pick someone they consider attractive (which doesn’t necessarily mean in a physical sense).
“Challenge?”
Yeah, challenge. Like, ages ago, I used to wonder why teenage girls would go and get pregnant etc and why they needed contraceptives. Why couldn’t they just keep their legs closed, like me? I used to think I must be a stronger person than them. Then I found out I was anaemic, and thus had a lower libido than them. What these girls had gone through was stronger than what I ever felt, and I had no right to judge them, and would do no better than they would if I were in their position.
Now, if you were mentioning people with willpower as a reference to yourself, because you have said no to sex so far, I would disagree; you are asexual, and haven’t felt desire. As you said, you have no interest in having sex, so what is your willpower resisting against? It’s like a person waving around a feather and saying “I am strong, I have lifted this little feather” when a better way to prove you a strong would be to lift a heavy weight dumb-bell. Likewise, people with little to no libido are no stronger or have more willpower than the next person. Want to prove you are strong? Be heterosexual (or homosexual/ bisexual or whatever), take a bunch of aphrodisiacs, watch a tonne of porn or whatever gets you interested, all the while not doing anything with yourself or anyone else.
“Intolerant adults, who were most likely got their racism, or sexism, or homophobia, or fundamentalism from another adult who insisted that in them as a child or teenager, or even as an adult, and will pass it on to the following generation.”
You are referring to hate, or bigotry. Come to think of it, how do those kinds of people think? “These people are different and should be treated differently” “I don’t want to be one of them” “I am better than them”…. Sound familiar?
“I’m not doing that though. It’s not as if I am starting it on something unrelated. IF someone expresses their opinion in a public place or on the internet, especially when it full of double standards, sexism (against both genders) hypocrisy, or selfishness, some people will express a negative opinion. I can’t help if so many women are so insecure and don’t want to take responsibility and be treated the same as men in a world of supposed equality.”
Doing it in a public place doesn’t make it less of a nuisance.
“Some people do, as I told other people. I’ve seen it myself. And they have good (non-religious, non-sexist, but self-respecting reason). Again, I’m doing that either, I’m just saying they think, and while others are of course allowed an opinon on it, it is somewhat meaningless when they rely on assumptions of ‘I was raped/molested/dumped’ a ‘religious nut’, ‘insane’, ‘repressed’ and what have you.”
Like I said before, no-one knows why you’re so uptight about “non-virgins” to the extent you are, so they were likely speculating as to why. Although come to think of it, if it was due to those reasons, you would have at least garnered some amount of sympathy.
“Again, I said that, but that doesn’t mean it is ok for them to go around throwing themselves at anyone. That is disgusting.”
What is disgusting, like beauty, is in the eye of the beholder.
It’s just the selfishness that comes with it, as I’ve said.
Your race, orientation, and gender are not a choice. And homosexual intercourse would never result in a selfish choice made by one partner. However, a homosexual boosting about their sex life and proclaiming how ‘liberated’ they are would be just as annoying as a straight person.
I’m not saying all do, but the point is, women tend to need more trust, more of a feeling that they are safe and secure. Ok, yes, there exists plenty of women who are so weak that they can’t wait to jump someone’s bones, but you understand what I mean, yes?
No, they are valuable when it comes to damage down there (as in, someone attacking there). Biologically it doesn’t make much sense for them to be so exposed. Why did some animal species evolve to have the testis on the outside?
And actually, that used to be the case. Men (in ancient times, mind) used to be seen as insulting their virility for sleeping around, and that women were too lustful to refuse sex.
Of course, but sex is not the same for both genders. Both physically and emotionally.
If something is rare, it tends to be valued. I’m not saying I’m special little angel, but neither am I common. I am uncommon. Simple.
That’s true I guess. I just won’t understand that as I don’t have sex. And again, sex is unlike any other activity. Well, I suppose eating could count.
I can’t help if it’s all over the bloody place. If they will express their opinions, so shall others.
…I’m stupid for saying that?
I’m just me – a weirdo.
I said it sounds arrogant, but then I tried to show reasons why it is not. Several times.
I do. I understand that I am entitled to my views as much as they without being insulted for it. I feel bad about jumping to insults so easily.
Well, if so, I couldn’t care less. Plus again, that would make I would have to start calling myself those names.
Ah, I said that too. You explained it better. Ok, what we said is fairly obvious, but you still explained it far better than me.
Well, I have appointments and bloods tests on a regular basis. They haven’t found anything yet, not that I discuss such things with a doctor.
Ok, but those people who so easily give into lust do not have willpower. I can understand it that I am weak in willpower in other ways. A craving for a certain food, for example. Sometimes I can resist it as I tell myself reasons, sometimes I don’t, and I take what comes with it (unsettled stomach, can’t sleep even less because of the sugar, etc), but I know that is my fault.
Again, your gender, orientation, race and whatnot are not chosen by the person.
It’s a free place.
Well, I don’t want ‘sympathy’. Nor would I want to add to that stereotype if it was the case. I’m not some fragile little flower much as I have my paranoia. I’m strong in other areas.
Yes, yes, that’s true, but there a faction for everything.
“It’s just the selfishness that comes with it, as I’ve said.”
If people where to care what is selfish and what is not to such a large extent nobody would have any fun
“Your race, orientation, and gender are not a choice. And homosexual intercourse would never result in a selfish choice made by one partner.”
Nor would a woman who uses contraceptives/ is infertile/ uses her left hand etc.
“However, a homosexual boosting about their sex life and proclaiming how ‘liberated’ they are would be just as annoying as a straight person.”
And a virgin claiming how liberated they are isn’t annoying? Yeah, there’s a bunch of SJW on tumblr no-one likes. They get their knocks though, however AFAIK, they don’t go around saying virgins who get rape is simply karma
“I’m not saying all do, but the point is, women tend to need more trust, more of a feeling that they are safe and secure. Ok, yes, there exists plenty of women who are so weak that they can’t wait to jump someone’s bones, but you understand what I mean, yes?”
I understand the differences you are pointing out. I do not see why it’s a reason to treat someone different. Wanting to be safe and secure is one thing, but using it as a basis for not getting things males get or how women who aren’t insecure about it can’t complain about rape is another.
“No, they are valuable when it comes to damage down there (as in, someone attacking there). Biologically it doesn’t make much sense for them to be so exposed. Why did some animal species evolve to have the testis on the outside?”
Actually I think it has to do with how the sperm developed in the testes need to be kept at a temperature less than what a mammalian body is kept at. If it was kept inside the sperm would die, so it’s kept outside to cool the sperm down. Googling it….
“And actually, that used to be the case. Men (in ancient times, mind) used to be seen as insulting their virility for sleeping around, and that women were too lustful to refuse sex.”
Maybe, but either way, wouldn’t that be sexist? I wouldn’t want men to not get something women get, and vice versa.
“Of course, but sex is not the same for both genders. Both physically and emotionally.”
Yeah, but you don’t want to be treated differently based on those differences, do you, I take it? So why treat others different? Do to others what you want done to you.
Like, you can argue sexes are different with sex. So are different individuals. You may feel even more vulnerable than most women. Maybe you alone should not be allowed to cheat while whatever BF/ husband/ GF whatever you get can be with whoever they want. You wouldn’t like that, would you?
“If something is rare, it tends to be valued. I’m not saying I’m special little angel, but neither am I common. I am uncommon. Simple.”
This is true, to an extent. It is my belief that things are valued based on what use you can get out of them. Take gold for example; it is useful because you can get money from it to buy things you want/ need. If you’re stuck in a desert though, a lump of gold is pretty much useless because it’s not going to turn itself magically into water or food which you really will need. If you want to be a virgin to be different it’s nice and I guess maybe you’ll value yourself. Maybe you feel you’ll be seen better in the eyes of a GF/ BF. I don’t know. Virginity however isn’t going to get you a job or money (unless you’re one of those people who sell their virginities, but considering what you’ve said so far I doubt it). It isn’t even something people are going to take notice of at first glance so it’s not like anyone else will care.
“That’s true I guess. I just won’t understand that as I don’t have sex. And again, sex is unlike any other activity. Well, I suppose eating could count.”
I just wish you could knock out the victim-blaming.
“I can’t help if it’s all over the bloody place. If they will express their opinions, so shall others.”
Like I said, they’re not saying people who get raped can’t complain etc. And considering how violent rape is, right to express your opinion can only get you so far.
“…I’m stupid for saying that?”
You need to laugh at things sometimes.
“I’m just me – a weirdo.”
Being a weirdo isn’t the problem. The “us and them” mentality is usually what leads to bigotry.
“I said it sounds arrogant, but then I tried to show reasons why it is not. Several times.”
Does that really outweigh the negative?
“I do. I understand that I am entitled to my views as much as they without being insulted for it. I feel bad about jumping to insults so easily.”
We all need to learn that at some point, as we all start off like that. I do that sometimes but I’ve hoped I have grown out of it.
“Well, if so, I couldn’t care less. Plus again, that would make I would have to start calling myself those names.”
How about not calling anyone names, either others or yourself?
You at least are consistent with your “dislike” whether it involves yourself or not.
“Ah, I said that too. You explained it better. Ok, what we said is fairly obvious, but you still explained it far better than me.”
Uhhh, thanks?
“Well, I have appointments and bloods tests on a regular basis. They haven’t found anything yet, not that I discuss such things with a doctor.”
If you say so.
“Ok, but those people who so easily give into lust do not have willpower. I can understand it that I am weak in willpower in other ways. A craving for a certain food, for example. Sometimes I can resist it as I tell myself reasons, sometimes I don’t, and I take what comes with it (unsettled stomach, can’t sleep even less because of the sugar, etc), but I know that is my fault.”
Some might be weak, yes. Some others it can’t be helped. And when it’s the latter, if nothing ill comes of it, why should it be a fault? Like when you eat that food, why feel guilty? You wanted the pleasure brought to you by that ice-cream, no-one else cares you ate it, it satisfied you, so why feel bad? It’s not a case of you being “weak” it was a case of that ice-cream being very tasty. So long as it doesn’t go so far as to cause anyone ill, which is more important than satisfying yourself.
“Again, your gender, orientation, race and whatnot are not chosen by the person.”
Food for thought; does it matter whether a person was able to choose something or not, so long as they aren’t harming anyone with it? What if the homophobes where right, homosexuality is a choice? Would homosexuality still really be wrong if it involves two consenting adults? Would it still be right for the others to continue their hate?
“It’s a free place.”
They were also free to smash my face in, which they did.
“Well, I don’t want ‘sympathy’. Nor would I want to add to that stereotype if it was the case. I’m not some fragile little flower much as I have my paranoia. I’m strong in other areas.”
If that is what you want.
“Yes, yes, that’s true, but there a faction for everything.”
As it’s not in the kind of way that most people do, and mine do not involve the same connotations.
Yes, that’s why there are different levels.
Well, thank you. Again, it is not ‘getting the same’ as males and females are not biologically the same. Other areas can be overcome as the reasons for the woman being disallowed from certain jobs or leadership roles were the different values and attitudes of the time, however, the divide in sexuality is based on our very, unchangeable biology. There is no innate biology (woman can be just as strong as men, either naturally or through training/building muscles) to say that woman cannot be builders, firefighters, frontline soldiers (I may hate the military, but I support that), CEOs, nor is there any to say men cannot be ballet dancers, fashion designers, househusbands, nannies and nurses. There is no way to get over the penetrator-penetrated/giver-receiver relationship in heterosexual intercourse unless you are gay.
As I said, virgins around my age are rare, not common. Again, homosexual intercourse does not come with the selfish ‘choice’ to kill the natural result while claiming it is your ‘reproductive right’, when the choice was to have sex. See my reasoning above. I’m sorry but that is something I cannot change.
A woman claiming this man’s penis is fine to be inside her, but this man, “Oh no, I’m much too pure, and ‘strong’ and ‘too good for him’” is a< hypocrite. It’s not like she already had sex or anything. It’s not like she is a sexual being or anything. It’s not like she has already been penetrated or anything.
The same goes for women who are fine with vaginal sex but anything else is disgusting. Most ridiculous is when she refuses to give a blowjob or handjob. Just…really?!
You can undo the evidence of having eaten cake, and just like most activities you are unaffected (unless you partake in it too much) afterward. When one is a non-virgin, they are so forever. Even getting one of those ridiculous ‘hymen repair surgeries’ (we both know that the hymen does not equal virginity – for me, it is partaking in any sexual activity whatsoever), that won’t undone one’s state of being.
Using contraceptives is selfish when they deny the natural result that may still happen. If it happens and they accept and are a supporter of true equality, then they may go ahead and have sex for pleasure all they like. You’re not being a hypocrite (unless they start claiming to be ‘sexually liberated’ or ‘feminist’ for letting a man dominate you). If not, that is the most disgusting, selfish, hypocritical action anyone could support or do, considering we were all foetuses once and they obviously do not support equality for all, but only when it suits women, as only women matter in this world of today. If the mother could die or, god forbid, it was from rape, that is far more understandable and not hypocritical, (but still a little bit selfish, but only a little, as it natural as well, wanting to preserve our own lives).
Ah, how stupid of me. I thought it was something to do with temperature, but I thought I was remembering it wrong, if you get what I mean. One of those ‘duuuuuuh’ moments. Though there has been a few people (men mostly, of course, though some in non-serious manners in comedy shows) have wondered why they can’t withdraw that particular area in case of attack.
That was a silly, senseless view of the past. The view after that made sense
I don’t have sex. I would not cheat anyway if that were the case. Men cannot ‘cheat’ on a woman unless he is the one she give her virginity to or married. And I would never date a non-virgin female anyway.
People care because they care about the relationships and perhaps future children as well. Ok, being a non-virgin does not automatically mean a woman will cheat, but she will compare, and most likely poison their children’s minds with the idea that sleeping around is a good thing. Not to mention she is touching those children and kissing them with lips once around another’s man genitals. It is valuable as they are highly unlikely to have any STDs as well, and regardless of how they would be passed on, it’s still there. It is valuable as it an indication (but far from the only way) of one’s strength and self-respect. For most asexuals though, it just comes naturally.
However, those girls who sell their virginity are just…there must be something wrong with them. I’m not saying that because they want to throw their virginity away from money, but rather because it indicates one had someone wrong in the mental area.
It’s not ‘victim-blaming’ that is just bullshit ‘feminists’ make up to avoid taking responsibly for their actions as the equality-seeking people they claim to be. Abuse victims and men in such cases especially, suffer victim blaming. You can’t teach people not to commit a crime they’ve never done or will continue to do, unless you are very luckily for the latter.
It’s only violence when you actually have someone to lose. As a said, a married non-virgin (provided that was the man/woman she give herself to) would not be violated, but her attacker is violating her marriage too. And if the husband/wife dumbed her for it, that would be disgusting as well. I don’t care if others hate this view or call me insane for it. I cannot change it as, unfortunately, I cannot see it any other way.
I do, but I just get worried, as I said.
Because there are two different groups of people, within the same group, as there is such exists in everything.
Others chose to see the negative. I of all people understand that (being a cynical person, after all) but still disagree.
Same here.
When they stop trying to shove their whiney, hypocritical views down everyone’s throats. But that won’t happen.
I made a genuine compliment. Sorry if it sounded sarcastic.
I’m just going on what I’ve been told and what I see myself.
Yes, but again, there are different connotations and results, again. However, eating those kinds of foods all the time can be bad as well, as it can led to health problems. However, at least that is less likely to harm others.
Again, homosexuality/homosexual intercourse (of either males or females) is far less likely to end in selfishness or someone preaching about how ‘liberated’ and ‘strong’ they are and anyone who insults them is a sexist. Hating on that would still be disgusting, as it saying that not being ‘normal’ is bad.
Well of course that would be bad. That’s violence. That’s abuse. That’s disgusting.
“As it’s not in the kind of way that most people do, and mine do not involve the same connotations.”
Still boils down to wanting to not be harassed, doesn’t it?
“Yes, that’s why there are different levels.”
Agreed, but unless it involves harming someone, why put it in such a low level. (putting aside abortion since like I said, a lot of the time pregnancy wouldn’t be involved)
“Well, thank you. Again, it is not ‘getting the same’ as males and females are not biologically the same. Other areas can be overcome as the reasons for the woman being disallowed from certain jobs or leadership roles were the different values and attitudes of the time, however, the divide in sexuality is based on our very, unchangeable biology. There is no innate biology (woman can be just as strong as men, either naturally or through training/building muscles) to say that woman cannot be builders, firefighters, frontline soldiers (I may hate the military, but I support that), CEOs, nor is there any to say men cannot be ballet dancers, fashion designers, househusbands, nannies and nurses. There is no way to get over the penetrator-penetrated/giver-receiver relationship in heterosexual intercourse unless you are gay.”
Or unless you don’t feel insecure or vulnerable about having something inside you, at least that’s what I’m trying to see your reasons for the whole “penetrated=submissive thing”.
“As I said, virgins around my age are rare, not common. “
The internet is in fact rife with virgins, actually.
“Again, homosexual intercourse does not come with the selfish ‘choice’ to kill the natural result while claiming it is your ‘reproductive right’, when the choice was to have sex. See my reasoning above. I’m sorry but that is something I cannot change.”
But then neither does using your left hand, people who are infertile, etc.
“A woman claiming this man’s penis is fine to be inside her, but this man, “Oh no, I’m much too pure, and ‘strong’ and ‘too good for him’” is a< hypocrite. It’s not like she already had sex or anything. It’s not like she is a sexual being or anything. It’s not like she has already been penetrated or anything.”
Ummm, that's NOT what a woman complains about when she gets raped. That’s not what she thinks. Maybe that’s what YOU’D think, but others, no. it’s more likely she’d think “Oh shit this is fucking painful” or “I really hate this gross creep who did this to me, I hope he rots in hell.” andfeeling a lot of disgust.
“The same goes for women who are fine with vaginal sex but anything else is disgusting. Most ridiculous is when she refuses to give a blowjob or handjob. Just…really?!”
Different folks, different strokes. I personally don’t get that either though, so long as it’s with someone you consent to do it with, I don’t see anything wrong with those. But if they don’t consent, it is a disgusting horrible act.
“You can undo the evidence of having eaten cake, and just like most activities you are unaffected (unless you partake in it too much) afterward. When one is a non-virgin, they are so forever. Even getting one of those ridiculous ‘hymen repair surgeries’ (we both know that the hymen does not equal virginity – for me, it is partaking in any sexual activity whatsoever), that won’t undone one’s state of being.”
I take it you are referring to the cake analogy someone else pointed out. Okay I’ll go with that then if you want. If one is non-virgin, it may be different or it may not (depends on the person) but if you consent at least you or no-one else is harmed. Getting raped is a form of harm. You can get scars, your internal organs might get damaged, you don’t feel secure about your safety. You can get rid of the evidence of eating the cake, but if your mouth is scarred preventing you from eating ever again, or you feel scared to eat again, you can’t undo that. Granted the first time you have sex can’t be undone either, but it’s not as traumatic.
“Using contraceptives is selfish when they deny the natural result that may still happen.”
See, I don’t get this. It stops a woman from getting pregnant, so no abortion will end up happening. Wouldn’t that make a pro-lifer such as yourself more happy? No killing, even if it is something which is currently debated by others whether it’s even alive or not.
On that note, I am curious, what is your stance on spaying animals? Yeah maybe it’s a bit insensitive putting animals when talking about people but I have been curious about this for a while.
“If it happens and they accept and are a supporter of true equality, then they may go ahead and have sex for pleasure all they like. You’re not being a hypocrite (unless they start claiming to be ‘sexually liberated’ or ‘feminist’ for letting a man dominate you). If not, that is the most disgusting, selfish, hypocritical action anyone could support or do, considering we were all foetuses once and they obviously do not support equality for all, but only when it suits women, as only women matter in this world of today. If the mother could die or, god forbid, it was from rape, that is far more understandable and not hypocritical, (but still a little bit selfish, but only a little, as it natural as well, wanting to preserve our own lives).”
The most? What about when someone on the streets who kills someone for a couple of bucks? What about some creep who rapes some poor girl (or guy) just so he can feel good about himself or herself? These are the worst sort of things you can do to someone. You seem to be focused on the killing of a foetus because of your own life experience not because of that’s what other people once were, only that because you once were a foetus that lived. Not everyone values the same things you do.
“Ah, how stupid of me. I thought it was something to do with temperature, but I thought I was remembering it wrong, if you get what I mean. One of those ‘duuuuuuh’ moments. Though there has been a few people (men mostly, of course, though some in non-serious manners in comedy shows) have wondered why they can’t withdraw that particular area in case of attack.”
That’s what life is like in the mammalian world.
“That was a silly, senseless view of the past. The view after that made sense”
It was?
“I don’t have sex. I would not cheat anyway if that were the case. Men cannot ‘cheat’ on a woman unless he is the one she give her virginity to or married. And I would never date a non-virgin female anyway.”
Good luck with that.
“People care because they care about the relationships and perhaps future children as well. Ok, being a non-virgin does not automatically mean a woman will cheat, but she will compare, and most likely poison their children’s minds with the idea that sleeping around is a good thing. Not to mention she is touching those children and kissing them with lips once around another’s man genitals. It is valuable as they are highly unlikely to have any STDs as well, and regardless of how they would be passed on, it’s still there. It is valuable as it an indication (but far from the only way) of one’s strength and self-respect. For most asexuals though, it just comes naturally.”
You know, I’m going to go out on a limb here and point out that my Mother was a non-virgin when she married. Not that it’s anyone’s business mind you. My Dad never cared, I never cared, my sisters never cared. And none of us “sleep around”… In fact I used to be the same as you almost. And heck, I don’t know exactly what she does behind closed doors with my Dad, but I do have a hunch they do do stuff that doesn’t involve getting pregnant (because that’s what married people do, have sex outside getting pregnant) and I still don’t care and I’m not afraid to hug/ kiss/ be kissed by them because I love them no matter what. I mean, your own Mother did something to conceive you (and your siblings if you have any) should you start avoiding her? To top it off, you touch your own genitalia when you wipe, maybe you should be avoided like the plague.
“However, those girls who sell their virginity are just…there must be something wrong with them. I’m not saying that because they want to throw their virginity away from money, but rather because it indicates one had someone wrong in the mental area.”
It involves money, who am I to judge? It’s their body, that’s what some people do. Maybe they’re just desperate to have a roof over their heads. Maybe you wouldn’t be so quick to judge if you weren’t so well off yourself.
“It’s not ‘victim-blaming’ that is just bullshit ‘feminists’ make up to avoid taking responsibly for their actions as the equality-seeking people they claim to be. Abuse victims and men in such cases especially, suffer victim blaming. You can’t teach people not to commit a crime they’ve never done or will continue to do, unless you are very luckily for the latter.”
I’m not talking about the cases where there are some women who falsely accuse men of rape. I’m talking about those who are raped. And that included men who are raped too. And it’s not bullshit. How would you like it if you got raped and some guy went up and told you it’s your own fault because all women are whores who want it?
“It’s only violence when you actually have someone to lose. As a said, a married non-virgin (provided that was the man/woman she give herself to) would not be violated, but her attacker is violating her marriage too. And if the husband/wife dumbed her for it, that would be disgusting as well. I don’t care if others hate this view or call me insane for it. I cannot change it as, unfortunately, I cannot see it any other way.”
Cannot, or will not? And why not? Why are you so strong on that stance, especially when it is in fact an immoral stance you are taking? This isn’t a case of some lesbian saying she won’t change her sexuality or something. This is a case of someone not seeing the immoral implications of rape. Rape for pities sake. You are looking at rape and not seeing something wrong with it. Don’t you get how VILE it is? Don’t you get how EVIL you’re being? What’s more important, your virginity or your soul?
“I do, but I just get worried, as I said.”
Worried? About what? Men not getting the same as women or vice versa? People are trying to solve that, not just you. Worried about foetuses dying?The abortion debate still rages between people who are wiser than you or I, and you think you’re smarter than any of them and have something to say that they haven’t? Pffft. Worried about women complaining about getting raped? They have a right to, and your evil for saying otherwise.
“Because there are two different groups of people, within the same group, as there is such exists in everything.”
Equality means for everyone though. Isn’t it the right sort of thing to strive for, and the right thing to avoid; bigotry?
“Others chose to see the negative. I of all people understand that (being a cynical person, after all) but still disagree.”
When you have a weakness, you don’t ignore it and focus on the strong “look how strong my right arm is!”, you look at the weak and exercise it and make it as strong as the rest of you. Same with the negative in people. Don’t ignore your own and make your better points stand out, make everything clean inside of you.
“Same here.”
Understandable
“When they stop trying to shove their whiney, hypocritical views down everyone’s throats. But that won’t happen.”
There are some groups I don’t get along with but I don’t call them names, do I?
“I made a genuine compliment. Sorry if it sounded sarcastic.”
I didn’t mean to imply that you were being sarcastic
“I’m just going on what I’ve been told and what I see myself.’
It’s your body. I am not one to tell you what is happening in it. I am going by my own experiences, it may relate to yours, it might not.
“Yes, but again, there are different connotations and results, again. However, eating those kinds of foods all the time can be bad as well, as it can led to health problems. However, at least that is less likely to harm others.”
The end result is the same between eating something nice and sex; you feel pleasure. Although sex is more pleasurable. And if you’re harming no-one, why fight it?
“Again, homosexuality/homosexual intercourse (of either males or females) is far less likely to end in selfishness or someone preaching about how ‘liberated’ and ‘strong’ they are and anyone who insults them is a sexist. Hating on that would still be disgusting, as it saying that not being ‘normal’ is bad.”
No offense meant to anyone homosexual out there, but I kind of expect that they do feel a bit liberated after they are after all were oppressed in the past. Why would that be wrong, or wrong for anyone else to preach it?
And once again, how can someone who is jilling off/ infertile/ contraceptives going to end in selfishness?
“Well of course that would be bad. That’s violence. That’s abuse. That’s disgusting.”
Getting punched is nothing. They didn’t bash me to death or anything like that. I kind of consider it society spanking my ass for misbehaving.
Yes, but I would not be a hypocrite by calling it such.
Well, for me, when it is selfishness that can be easily avoided, then it is still an issue. We all can be selfish, it’s in our genes after all. Some just choose to do it more than others.
No, it’s just when they claim to be ‘feminist’ and ‘free’ when they are willing putting themselves into a submissive position, as natural as it is. Even if thet are dominant mentally (E.g. being the one to take charge in trouble situations or being authoritative), they still have that one area. However, unlike what most people think, that does not mean I judge women entirely on virginity, or think all non-virgins are horrible. For example, biological mothers are non-virgins, most married women are non-virgins, most lesbians are non-virgins.
Yes, but they(especially if male) are insulted and shamed for that, as I’m guessing this a quip about that.
Yes, that is true. If I did not say that before, that is true.
I know, I’m just showing the way she is basically acting, regardless of her thoughts. It is not ‘gross’ as she is already a sexual being, as I said.
So you’re saying you can violate a woman’s hand or mouth, even though she already have sex with that person/is comfortable with having another man’s sexual organ inside her, which is basically touching it? Pfft. Next you’ll say you believe that bullshit that a woman being ‘tricked’ into having sex was ‘raped’ (she fell for the lie, she choose to have that sex, she consented, and a man in particular cannot ‘use’ a woman, as she choose to let him in).
Well, then, as I said to her, metaphor or not, it is simply not the same. Eating a cake (or to put in more perspective, kissing someone) is not making an irreversible choice (not even that insane ‘hymen surgery’ counts, though I’m not suprized some people think the hymen still means virginity or not, it can be broken by something as simple as your period). I’m happy to kiss my mother (you’re never too old) and my boyfriend, but that does not mean I would be happy with some random person kissing me. I’ve even hugged strangers despite the germ-related part of my OCD (I know the real name, but I can’t remember it right now) and it was only in very specific circumstances – being at a con, and said people had those ‘free hugs’ signs. Besides, who doesn’t like a nice hug?
However, the suffering is of course real, and one should be helped to get past that, but it is still hypocritical to be like that.
Yes, that is true, but the thing is, they still want to go and get an abortion, even though they know that no matter what kind of contraception it is, no matter how many different types you use, there is always that chance, that small chance, that woman will become pregnant. That is where the selfishness, the barbarism comes in.
Well, while I feel it is cruel, I read up on the reasons why, and that neutering can extend a male dog’s life, so I can understand. It seems as if we are denying them their natural desire to breed, but if it makes their lives happier, it’s a good thing. And it might reduce them humping stuff too. And if I was against it, that would be hypocritical, as I’m for human circumcision, as I respect it as part of another’s religion and because it has health benefits. However, I do feel that is anti-feminist/sexist, as I’m basically saying it’s ok to…I’m not sure if ‘mutilate’ is the right word…the body of another, as no one, unless they were sick, is for female circumcision. Then again, it comes down to the different sexual organs, I suppose.
Hm? Those are disgusting of course, but needless/selfish version of abortion are just that bit worse as that life is being taking after before they even experience the outside world and is an option. In addition, while it is still not an excuse, and should be treated as badly, but someone people have an ‘urge’, something in there that demand they kill, or someone who cannot control themselves.
If you are referring to my birth, yes, it does have an effect, as it means that I am one of those people whose mother was told (or thought herself) that I would live a miserable life and I proved them wrong. A secondary school friend weighed two ounces less than me, and has far poorer eyesight (but that is all she had in regards to medical conditions), and she is now in college. Sure, I’m not completely independent, as I said, but I know I’ll have to be one day. I’m still happy with my life at the moment. I’m still trying to contribute to society. However, my main reason is because we were once that life, and that everyone is entitled to a life unless they have committed some irredeemable crime (for me, it is murder, rape, child or animal abuse), and no one has the right to dictate who lives and who dies. Such a thing makes existence itself something punishable.
True, true. And there are some monks who can take a kick in the balls (or several) and are not even fazed: www.youtube.com/watch?v=Js_3bI… either they have an incredible amount of strength to hide their pain, or their training has affected their bodies to withstand such a thing.
Again, because of the biology.
Yes, I know, I’ll end up dying alone if ever I wanted to seek out a new partner if my current relationship goes down the plughole. I just need to hope that never happens. I know people say this a lot, but he’s the best I could have, and I wouldnot want to be with anyone else.
As I said, some people just don’t care, and that is a noble thing. Some men nowadays care about virginity (and there is nothing ‘misogynistic’ or ‘oppressive’ aboutthat, to comment on the typically help opinion), but others (and women, of course) who do not care are not any lesser. I just hope they comfortable kissing lips that may have been around another man’s cock, or going where other men have gone before, and that she will most likely compare him to previous partners.
As for having sex outside of getting pregnant, I mentioned that several times. The only bad thing about that is when people break up over lack of sex, calling a relationship that once had sex in it ‘sexless’ and ‘miserable’. Regardless of the reasons, it’s still a pretty shallow parting reason.
Yes, and she wanted kids, she had sex for that, and she was happy that I thought the same (again, she let me have my own views). Like most children I take after her in ways I did not even realize, as in, you have similar habits or personality traits. Also, not to mention, that was twenty years ago (my brother is a year younger).
Oh, I know my hands are clean. That’s when OCD is a good thing. Just because it’s my genitals does not make what comes out of there any less disgusting, no matter how normal it is.
It’s basically prostitution. You would never see a man doing that. Most men don’t resort to seeing their bodies when they are desperate.
Well off? I’m on benefits, and there are only two people in this house, and we don’t exactly use a lot of electricity (it’s my brother who have to five things on at once). Just because I’m disabled, or in the working class, does not mean I cannot have fun, or a life. It’s those kinds of reasons why the government have cut benefits and forced so many disabled people into jobs they can’t do, implying that actual disability is being a joyless, home-bound shell. But that’s another story.
Sure I’m not poor, but I’m not well off either. In regards to money we’re…average. And I give money to those who are actually poor, and wish I could help out in person. I’m hoping to find a project here I can help with. I applied for several overseas over two or so years as I was preparing to leave school, but I was refused on account of my disabilities (and age, because, you know, you have to be a certain age to want to help people), and the ones here are not much better.
And if the situation ever got that dire, I’d rather work in the sewers than become a prostitute, and you can imagine such thing that could affect me in the hygiene obsessive department. Or I would rather die than give my body away.
But I’m not a non-virgin, and I would have put myself in a position to be taken advantage of. Yes, it is entirely the attacker’s fault for the crime, but it is still our duty to keep ourselves aware, and not inhibit our senses and minds. One chooses to get drunk. One chooses to walk the night streets alone. One chooses to wear clothing (much as it is their choice) meant to display the body sexuality and in a public place. It is called responsibly and self-awareness. Indeed you can do all this and still end up victimized, but it far reduces your chances (after all, most rapes do happen by someone the person knows…you need to be careful with who you befriend too, such as I do). Who do you think someone is going to more likely to attack? – the sober person who is accompanied by someone else, or the drunk idiot stumbling around?
No, I am not seeing ‘rape’ at all. I know what rape is. In fact, rape used to be defined as the violation of a chaste woman. It’s good that, at least in most countries, it is gender neutral (though in the UK, the law basically stated that women could not rape until 2012), but now there is this extra crap to account for the looser morals action of modern people).
I have a soul. I’ve shown plenty of times the things I care about, the things I fight for, that I care for moral and political issues. I am not some heartless beast because of this one opinon people have a problem with. I’m not a racist, a homophobe, a fascist, anti-Semitic, anti-atheist, and so on. I support what and accept what most mornder, good people support.
Yes, but it is not ‘bigotry’ to state that there is a biological difference between men and women.
But you can’t get over all weaknesses, no matter how hard you try. Everyone has flaws. I know there are some flaws I can never get rid of, so I focus on what I do well, what I feel is and have been told is good about me. It’s better than me being miserable or angsting about how ‘useless’, or ‘worthless’ I am.
They call those people names. It’s only fair, if immature, to return the behaviour. If you were being bullied, would you say it is stupid if someone says that you fighting back, doing the same thing, is bad? I’m not some little wimp or doormat. I give back what people send out.
Oh, good.
Fair enough, it’s what I do as well, I would think.
Again, it’s the attitudes as I’ve said. People are free to whatever they want in their lives, but something that is choice can and will be judged. I am judged for my hobbies.
No, no, that is a point. Yes, one would feel liberated, but surely you get annoyed at those who are all “I’m gay and proud, bitches!”. A better attitude would to just be happy that is no longer hated by most of the world, and don’t make a big deal out of it unless there was homophobia. I only say about myself being asexual/biromantic on topics related to sex. I would expect others to be annoyed if I waltzed around the streets proclaiming it to everyone I see.
I mentioned the contraceptives. It is when a woman who claims her ‘jilling off’ (heh, I see what you did there) claims they are still a virgin, or ‘liberated’ when it is a sexual activity.
“Yes, but I would not be a hypocrite by calling it such.”
And you wouldn’t complain about it happening to you?
“Well, for me, when it is selfishness that can be easily avoided, then it is still an issue. We all can be selfish, it’s in our genes after all. Some just choose to do it more than others.”
While the latter is true the former has never been an issue with me. That might just be me though.
“No, it’s just when they claim to be ‘feminist’ and ‘free’ when they are willing putting themselves into a submissive position, as natural as it is..”
What if they’re not even bothering with the feminist label?
“Even if thet are dominant mentally (E.g. being the one to take charge in trouble situations or being authoritative), they still have that one area. However, unlike what most people think, that does not mean I judge women entirely on virginity, or think all non-virgins are horrible. For example, biological mothers are non-virgins, most married women are non-virgins, most lesbians are non-virgins”
That does sound better in comparison to what you’ve said before
“Yes, but they(especially if male) are insulted and shamed for that, as I’m guessing this a quip about that.”
No, and neither men nor woman should be shamed for it. This doesn’t stop them complaining about it though despite the fact that most people know enough to not care (aka wizards). There are plenty though that don’t (seem to) give a damn if they’re a virgin though.
“Yes, that is true. If I did not say that before, that is true.”
Ah okay.
“I know, I’m just showing the way she is basically acting, regardless of her thoughts. It is not ‘gross’ as she is already a sexual being, as I said.”
Just because she became sexually active doesn’t negate her feeling of disgust when she gets raped. She would just be as disgusted as you would if some creep had his way with her.
Edit: So you see rape victims as little snots who are hypocrites for saying no? Should people see you the same way when you say no?
“So you’re saying you can violate a woman’s hand or mouth, even though she already have sex with that person/is comfortable with having another man’s sexual organ inside her, which is basically touching it? Pfft. “
Uh, actually yeah. In fact, it could be her own boyfriend/ husband who she had sex with before that who rapes her. And it’s STILL WRONG. Whether it’s vaginal or using some other body part, it’s STILL WRONG.
“Next you’ll say you believe that bullshit that a woman being ‘tricked’ into having sex was ‘raped’ (she fell for the lie, she choose to have that sex, she consented, and a man in particular cannot ‘use’ a woman, as she choose to let him in).”
It’s not bullshit. Coercion is coercion, whether by force or by deception. Same with men. Who said she chose? What if she was drugged? Coerced because if she didn’t he’d harm someone she loved, or something she valued, not necessarily her? What if she was mentally disabled and didn’t know any better? Don’t knock people claiming being tricked into it; it could happen to you if you’re not careful.
“Well, then, as I said to her, metaphor or not, it is simply not the same. Eating a cake (or to put in more perspective, kissing someone) is not making an irreversible choice (not even that insane ‘hymen surgery’ counts, though I’m not suprized some people think the hymen still means virginity or not, it can be broken by something as simple as your period). I’m happy to kiss my mother (you’re never too old) and my boyfriend, but that does not mean I would be happy with some random person kissing me. I’ve even hugged strangers despite the germ-related part of my OCD (I know the real name, but I can’t remember it right now) and it was only in very specific circumstances – being at a con, and said people had those ‘free hugs’ signs. Besides, who doesn’t like a nice hug?”
There shouldn’t be anything wrong with a hug, yeah.
But it’s not so much the reversibility that should be taken into account, but the harm it does. Rape is harmful, losing virginity under your own choice is not.
“However, the suffering is of course real, and one should be helped to get past that, but it is still hypocritical to be like that.”
It shouldn’t be.
“Yes, that is true, but the thing is, they still want to go and get an abortion, even though they know that no matter what kind of contraception it is, no matter how many different types you use, there is always that chance, that small chance, that woman will become pregnant. That is where the selfishness, the barbarism comes in.”
That’s rather harsh to judge someone on that small chance. They’re doing their best to stop the abortion happening (and also, just because someone is using contraceptives doesn’t necessarily mean they WILL get an abortion if it fails). If nothing happens, and no abortion occurs, why would it be wrong?
“Well, while I feel it is cruel, I read up on the reasons why, and that neutering can extend a male dog’s life, so I can understand. It seems as if we are denying them their natural desire to breed, but if it makes their lives happier, it’s a good thing. And it might reduce them humping stuff too. And if I was against it, that would be hypocritical, as I’m for human circumcision, as I respect it as part of another’s religion and because it has health benefits. However, I do feel that is anti-feminist/sexist, as I’m basically saying it’s ok to…I’m not sure if ‘mutilate’ is the right word…the body of another, as no one, unless they were sick, is for female circumcision. Then again, it comes down to the different sexual organs, I suppose.”
Yeah, mutilation is horrible. But the former helps the animals at least.
“Hm? Those are disgusting of course, but needless/selfish version of abortion are just that bit worse as that life is being taking after before they even experience the outside world and is an option. In addition, while it is still not an excuse, and should be treated as badly, but someone people have an ‘urge’, something in there that demand they kill, or someone who cannot control themselves.”
Those people need help though if they have the urge to kill someone, and need to be kept away from others at the very least.
“If you are referring to my birth, yes, it does have an effect, as it means that I am one of those people whose mother was told (or thought herself) that I would live a miserable life and I proved them wrong. A secondary school friend weighed two ounces less than me, and has far poorer eyesight (but that is all she had in regards to medical conditions), and she is now in college. Sure, I’m not completely independent, as I said, but I know I’ll have to be one day. I’m still happy with my life at the moment. I’m still trying to contribute to society. However, my main reason is because we were once that life, and that everyone is entitled to a life unless they have committed some irredeemable crime (for me, it is murder, rape, child or animal abuse), and no one has the right to dictate who lives and who dies. Such a thing makes existence itself something punishable.”
Yep, focused on your success story. Being a pro-lifer is irritating, but not wrong. When you can’t see someone getting raped because you’re busy being worried a non-existent baby might die, there’s the problem.
“True, true. And there are some monks who can take a kick in the balls (or several) and are not even fazed: www.youtube.com/watch?v=Js_3bI…@ either they have an incredible amount of strength to hide their pain, or their training has affected their bodies to withstand such a thing.”
That’s interesting
“Again, because of the biology.”
Oh?
“Yes, I know, I’ll end up dying alone if ever I wanted to seek out a new partner if my current relationship goes down the plughole. I just need to hope that never happens. I know people say this a lot, but he’s the best I could have, and I wouldnot want to be with anyone else.”
Okay
“As I said, some people just don’t care, and that is a noble thing. Some men nowadays care about virginity (and there is nothing ‘misogynistic’ or ‘oppressive’ aboutthat, to comment on the typically help opinion), but others (and women, of course) who do not care are not any lesser. I just hope they comfortable kissing lips that may have been around another man’s cock, or going where other men have gone before, and that she will most likely compare him to previous partners.”
And what if the partner doesn’t care at all?
“As for having sex outside of getting pregnant, I mentioned that several times. The only bad thing about that is when people break up over lack of sex, calling a relationship that once had sex in it ‘sexless’ and ‘miserable’. Regardless of the reasons, it’s still a pretty shallow parting reason.”
The sex lives of people are strange and complex. We’re both virgins, I for one can’t judge.
“Yes, and she wanted kids, she had sex for that, and she was happy that I thought the same (again, she let me have my own views). Like most children I take after her in ways I did not even realize, as in, you have similar habits or personality traits. Also, not to mention, that was twenty years ago (my brother is a year younger).”
Doesn’t mean she didn’t touch cock, no matter what the reason behind doing it was.
“Oh, I know my hands are clean. That’s when OCD is a good thing. Just because it’s my genitals does not make what comes out of there any less disgusting, no matter how normal it is.”
So why knock it when someone touches someone else’s genitals?
“It’s basically prostitution. You would never see a man doing that. Most men don’t resort to seeing their bodies when they are desperate. “
You’ve never heard of a male prostitute? They exist. (Okay I haven’t exactly met one, but I see them on TV).
“Well off? I’m on benefits, and there are only two people in this house, and we don’t exactly use a lot of electricity (it’s my brother who have to five things on at once). Just because I’m disabled, or in the working class, does not mean I cannot have fun, or a life. It’s those kinds of reasons why the government have cut benefits and forced so many disabled people into jobs they can’t do, implying that actual disability is being a joyless, home-bound shell. But that’s another story. Sure I’m not poor, but I’m not well off either. In regards to money we’re…average. And I give money to those who are actually poor, and wish I could help out in person. I’m hoping to find a project here I can help with. I applied for several overseas over two or so years as I was preparing to leave school, but I was refused on account of my disabilities (and age, because, you know, you have to be a certain age to want to help people), and the ones here are not much better.”
No, you’re not living in a mansion, I know that, but considering you have a roof over your head and food on your table, compared to others you’re loaded. Some people would do anything to get those things (or perhaps they’re just money hungry, who knows?)
“And if the situation ever got that dire, I’d rather work in the sewers than become a prostitute, and you can imagine such thing that could affect me in the hygiene obsessive department. Or I would rather die than give my body away.”
Not everyone is as proud as you.
Edit the second: Why do see "giving your body away" as so horrible that you'd rather die (putting aside things like prostitution in dire times)? I've seen you mention it elsewhere that you would rather die than have sex. The only reason so far you gave is that it might lead to a pregnancy, and if that doesn't happen, why is it so bad? Oh yeah, or you might be someone you'd feel the need to insult. Is being one of the "bad girls" such a traumatising experience for you? Why? People aren't so bad on the other side, and you wouldn't be a bad person if you went ahead and had sex.
“But I’m not a non-virgin, and I would have put myself in a position to be taken advantage of. Yes, it is entirely the attacker’s fault for the crime, but it is still our duty to keep ourselves aware, and not inhibit our senses and minds. One chooses to get drunk. One chooses to walk the night streets alone. One chooses to wear clothing (much as it is their choice) meant to display the body sexuality and in a public place. It is called responsibly and self-awareness. Indeed you can do all this and still end up victimized, but it far reduces your chances (after all, most rapes do happen by someone the person knows…you need to be careful with who you befriend too, such as I do). Who do you think someone is going to more likely to attack? – the sober person who is accompanied by someone else, or the drunk idiot stumbling around?”
I had no idea going home after working night-shift was an invitation to rape. And if dressing lightly is as well, you should go out and tell all the men who go around shirtless. Guess those guys are asking for it, huh? Maybe you too, after all what is seen as sexual or not is all in perspective. You’re not stuck at home, wearing a hijab, to Islamic extremists, that makes you a whore. Maybe you should start wearing a hijab to reduce your chances of getting raped, otherwise YOU’RE CHOOSING to get raped (and they are, at least here, the ones who do the raping most usually; Islamic extremists). If you want responsibility and self-awareness go out and join those extremist then and wear a hijab. Until then, you’re just as irresponsible, hypocritical, and asking for it as much as the rest of us.
“No, I am not seeing ‘rape’ at all. I know what rape is.”
An oxymoron then. If you don’t see that someone, whether they are virgin or not, is getting sexually abused as rape, then no, you don’t know what rape is.
“ In fact, rape used to be defined as the violation of a chaste woman. It’s good that, at least in most countries, it is gender neutral (though in the UK, the law basically stated that women could not rape until 2012), but now there is this extra crap to account for the looser morals action of modern people).”
It should be gender neutral. But the latter is not crap. Rape is rape. No means no.
“I have a soul. I’ve shown plenty of times the things I care about, the things I fight for, that I care for moral and political issues. I am not some heartless beast because of this one opinon people have a problem with. I’m a racist, a homophobe, a fascist, anti-Semitic, anti-atheist, and so on.”
You’re risking it though. Like you said, you don’t see a non-virgin woman getting sexually abused as rape. This is wrong.
“Yes, but it is not ‘bigotry’ to state that there is a biological difference between men and women.”
Biological difference is one thing. I could point out black people are biologically different (they do have more melamine for example) but to say black people can’t be raped based on this or anything else would be bigoted. What you are doing is bigotry.
“But you can’t get over all weaknesses, no matter how hard you try. Everyone has flaws. I know there are some flaws I can never get rid of, so I focus on what I do well, what I feel is and have been told is good about me. It’s better than me being miserable or angsting about how ‘useless’, or ‘worthless’ I am.”
This is true, but the right thing to do is try to improve yourself as best as you can. I’m not asking you to magically become someone who isn’t almost blind. I’m asking you to consider your mental perspective of things. This is not an impossible thing to do.
“They call those people names. It’s only fair, if immature, to return the behaviour. If you were being bullied, would you say it is stupid if someone says that you fighting back, doing the same thing, is bad? I’m not some little wimp or doormat. I give back what people send out.”
If that is what you want. It is sinking to their level though.
“Fair enough, it’s what I do as well, I would think.”
I try to do the right thing.
“Again, it’s the attitudes as I’ve said. People are free to whatever they want in their lives, but something that is choice can and will be judged. I am judged for my hobbies.”
Those people are idiots though. I don’t like FMA or whatever you’re into, but I’m not going to go on about that.
“No, no, that is a point. Yes, one would feel liberated, but surely you get annoyed at those who are all “I’m gay and proud, bitches!”. A better attitude would to just be happy that is no longer hated by most of the world, and don’t make a big deal out of it unless there was homophobia. I only say about myself being asexual/biromantic on topics related to sex. I would expect others to be annoyed if I waltzed around the streets proclaiming it to everyone I see.”
Umm, you kind of did that on a lot of places online already.
“I mentioned the contraceptives. It is when a woman who claims her ‘jilling off’ (heh, I see what you did there) claims they are still a virgin, or ‘liberated’ when it is a sexual activity.”
Technically it they're still a virgin, considering the current definition of a virgin.
“It’s still unacceptable.”
A small hit is nothing, yet you are upset about this while shrugging of a woman getting raped. You are a strange one.
Indeed. Everyone is free to think what will, but that does not stop some attitudes from having selfish/hypocritical connotations.
Then fair enough. They are not pretending to be what they are not. It’s not suprizing many do not identify as such, given the blatant misandry, double standards and the ‘any negative attitude towards women is sexist and misogynist, and everyone bad that happens to them is someone else’s fault’ that exists within it, and are the majority nowadays. That’s not to say the opposite side (the MRA/MRM) does not have it’s insane/idiotic, misogynistic members. Some even wholly believe that women were never oppressed in the first place, and that being denied the ability to vote did not count because plenty of men did not have it and they were ‘just handed it’. Moreover, they claim the inability to own homes, and land, or get a decent job were ‘provision and protection’ and that arranged marriage is ‘providing a woman with money and a house for life’. I once encountered one of those in person (well, as ‘in person’ as a comments section can be) when I pointed out the arranged wives are often raped, he came out with the typical quip of ‘yeah, because all men will rape any time they get the chance’.
Only Humanists/Equalists seem to have the most sane, calm members (I mean that, while the insane MRAs in the minority, they still most likely outnumber those in the latter titles).
Well, thanks (I mean about you not making a snarky comment). Well, if they are shamed for being a virgin, they have every right to complain, but if it is more the attitude of “Why don’t people want to have sex with me?!” or “I need to get laid or I’m a loser who fails at life!” (though that is more other people’s attitudes), then yeah, they should be shamed for that.
Yes it does. I’ve never done anything sexual. I haven’t done those things previously.
As for the edit, again, I haven’t done anything sexual, and there is nothing wrong with respecting one’s virginity (or being asexual – i.e. not being interesting in or having the desire to have sex, or lack of a sexual attraction to anyone). I’m just doing what is natural. Maybe if I had lust and did have sex, then I would be pompous and two faced for refusing this one man/these men out of the others I may have been with. Modern Feminism/Femifascism has led to women thinking they can do whatever they want and no one can say otherwise, even though that’s not how life works. As it is has been said more than a few times, women can’t have it both ways.
No. Marriage is giving one’s body to their partner. Both partners. Ok, if she was too tired, and her partner (male or female) went ahead and still did that, that would a be a very selfish action, but they are married, and she has been with them sexually before.
Marriage is a partnership. You love each other. You listen to each other. If she was a virgin and was not ready, that is rape regardless of the marriage. The same goes if the genders were reversed. Some countries still don’t seem to understand that marriage does not mean you must get it or the marriage is invalid. In England, refusing to consummate a marriage (from either gender) is grounds for divorce Do they not understand the kinds of actions that can lead too?
And when it is a man, she has been penetrated vaginally, so the hands or mouth are nothing compared to that.
No, that’s bullshit. Once more, rape is not simply rape anymore. We now have to include the idiots that put themselves at risk of some sick beast, and the hypocrites. Being drugged or threatened is not you putting yourself at in a vulnerable position. Especially when it is your family is being threatened. If someone waved around money and walked home on their own, surely they put themselves in a position to be mugged, even though the actual crime is the fault of the criminal? That is real life. Criminals will attack those who look like an easy target.
It is not ‘force’ because it was the other woman who fell for it like an idiot. Being mentally disabled would be different. She would not know any better. A woman with full control of her mind or even the slightest hint of intelligence would not fall for such a thing, regardless of whether she is a naturally gullible person or not. Once more, this is a way to excuse women of their responsibility as equal citizens and blame and shame men yet more.
As I said, it is not the taking of virginity when I think raping a virgin (again, there is little no difference between a virgin and non-virgin man unless he the bottom in homosexual intercourse, but unlike men and women, two men and two women can swap that dynamic easily) is disgusting, sick, other negative expressions, is because that non-sexual woman is having something sexual (yes, she most likely will be planning to sex at some point, but she has yet to do it), something she is not a part of, being forced upon her. Just as say, a vegetarian would feel violated if meat was forced upon then, or if a Muslin had alcohol forced upon them. Why is that so hard to understand?
Ok.
No, you read me wrongly. I know perfectly well about Gigolos. And the ignored fact that plenty of boys are forced in sex trafficking. I was just saying that not as many men resort to it when they are desperate. For women, it is seem as natural, and the best choice, but men? No, there are things they can do. It is only the stupid women who think that is only or best option.
I know, but that choosing to lose one’s virginity for pleasure means one is being a permanent sexual being. Again, it’s like saying you won't risk getting mugged if you wave around money, much as that is your choice and there is nothing harmful about it (unless you are less well-off and find it insulting, but that is not an excuse for violence).
I know that, but again, they took that risk, as we all take risk in everything we do. Sometimes you can’t see it coming, hence why they are accidents, but taking part in a activity you know can result a certain result, and then trying to excuse that result, calling it ‘unwanted’ and ‘accidental’, especially when that is another person’s life? Sick, insane, inhumane.
That’s what I’m trying to say. There is no harm in that case unless they possess those pompous, ‘feminist’ attitudes I keep mentioning. As for when it does, see above.
Yes. And unlike humans, at least the animal is asleep during it. I mean yes, we don’t remember our infancy, and there is the benefits, but it’s the thought, that these so very young boys have had a sharp object placed at their genitals. And in some female version, sometimes they don’t just cut off the labia/clitoris, they take away everything on the outside. And of course, ther is no sanitation or pain relief. Just recently I read that as well as the usual broken glass, sometimes fingernails are used. And of course, it has no heath benefits whatsoever, and, most likely because it is where they were raised, women still accept it as a necessary and normal part of their life.
Of course. But people are too lenient now. I know it is cruel thing to say, but mental conditions are not an excuse for ruining another person’s life. And imagine how their loved ones would feel, nothing that victim did not get justice.
No. I said numerous times why it is wrong. If murdering a child just born is murder, then murdering that life when it is still inside you is wrong as well. There is no ‘measure’ of life. Life is life, until they forfeit it by (again) destroying the life one of someone or some being else. So it is ‘irritating’ to care for all innocent life equality, to want true equality, to want to give everyone a chance regardless of their situation, to not have willing fathers ignored and belittled? Well, at least, unlike most pro-choicers (the choice, once more, was to have sex), you did not stereotype me as being some bible-thumping loon. And even if someone opposes it on religious grounds, I feel there is nothing wrong with that either. People are entitled to their beliefs. I even say the same for homophobes, and the arsehole brand of atheism, as plenty of people will share their beliefs about them The extreme ones need to be ignored.
Yup.
I said it before. Because of the way women and men work, etc, etc.
I’m just saying I’m resigned to that.
Again, that is good. They feel the way they feel and have a right to it.
Yes, I know, but yes, just like you, I’ve never been in a sexual relationship, so perhaps, I guess I can it put like…well, Matt and I always have and always had such long, interesting or strange conversations, and if that suddenly stopped or never happened, I would feel like the relationship is not working out, and we could end up drifting apart, so one may feel that, if the sex is missing, it is not a full relationship. While that is still very shallow, it has the same reasoning behind it, I would think.
Yes, but the difference is, she did not for completely natural reasons. She did not show any selfishness or think she was better because of it, because, as you said, it’s still sex, even though it was the pregnancy she desired. Besides, even though I wasn’t (much as mum wanted it to be that way), any child born the natural way has touched their mum’s vagina.
As it is someone else’s. You don’t know where they’ve been, what they’ve done. Would you drink from a straw someone else had used?
Well, actually, that is what I say too. So long as one had a good house over there head and food in their belly, or food to spare, I think we should be happy. Of course, though, humans are more complicated than that.
And? Their choice.
Because I myself am uncomfortable with the idea. And even if you are comfortable with, are a very sexual, as the penetrated party, it is that no matter what. She is ‘giving herself’ to another. Even if those two break up or it is one night stand, that person still has that. A woman is not ‘free’ of that person simply because she stopped sleeping with them, virgin when she started or not. They still have the fact that she gave herself to them, that she did have sex with them.
It is not ‘traumatizing’. I’m simply happy I’m not part of that group. As it natural for an asexual (though there are other forms), I am uncomfortable with the idea of sex, or sexual activity. I don’t need to ‘try it’ in order to know that I don’t like it.
I am not saying it is a ‘bad’ thing, but that that is just the way it works.
I did not say it was an ‘invitation’. I said it is putting oneself at risk. And if you are alone, one has to be weary. I’m not one of those people who are all “It’ll never happen me!” people.
And there is a difference between dressing lightly, and mini skirt or low cut top/boob tube, and then having the cheek to complain when someone else admires (not ‘objectifies’, as you are a person, a sexual person not a character on a screen) your body. Even in school, even when their skirts were unbelievably tiny, they still wore tights and kept it relatively modest. And if someone is so ‘proud of their body’, they have even less right to complain, especially when it is just words, or a look. I knew you would mention shirtless men. Nudity itself is sexual, however it is the way the nudity is framed or displayed. For example, if said hypothetical man had on a gimp mask and leech.
I’m not immune from judgement upon my hobbies/clothing, either, remember? However, with me always wearing decent clothes and being a virgin, I have a right to complain about such a thing as I am not a part of that group.
Yes, and that is a terrible attitude. They take modestly way, way too far, and act if as a woman cannot have any fun outside the home or she is putting herself at risk. My (and the reasoning most so called ‘victim-blamers’, such as that police officer who sparked the SlutWalk horseshite), is valid is not doing any harm, as they are words on someone’s choice, views make sense instead of being oppressive.
No, it’s an oxymoron (yes, I know what that is) to say that a sexual woman is getting ‘assaulted’ when she has nothing to lose.
Of course. No means no when it actually is no, and not some two-faced missy kidding on she has better standards.
I don’t care if others think it is wrong. They take that over all of my other beliefs, making it out that that is all I am. I have other subjects in my life, other pursuits. They are putting me in a box as much as I am to them.
No, it’s not, because being black is not a choice. Having sex is.
I do, but I just can’t see it any other way in regards to that topic. Even the cake analogy much as I understood it (that just because someone enjoys doing something, it does not make it okay for another person to make them do it), however, again, that is not sex, that is an irreversible choice. Just because I’m not some sheep to bows down to misandric, hypocritical Femifascists does not make a bad person.
I know it is. But even when I try to be nice, it still does not work. I tried to be nice to my bullies too, and they still punched and kicked, and insulted and stole my inhaler and magnifier.
I am trying to do so too. But again, it’s hard when people are screaming at you. Again, I enjoy having a nice, calm debate as much as I would fawning over a mutual interest with someone. The former simply gets me thinking more. I do like to see what the other sides say, but not when they are screaming and shouting and insulting and whatnot.
Again, once sexual topics, especially when it someone saying how great they are for being sexual.
Sexually activity is sexual activity. Hardly anyone believes in the ‘technical virgin’ anyone. For example, say someone gives a blowjob, they would most likely be laughed at if they still claimed virginity.
Well, if it really was small, then ok. Even if you pissed someone off, that’s still not an excuse. No, I am not ‘shrugging off’ ‘rape’, I care about actual issues and not some lady who kids on she’s better than other non-virgins.
Sta.sh
Yes, it does. And nice job trying to oppress my opinion and pigeon-holding me. I am neither. How the fuck is that ‘sex trafficking’ anyway? I wouldn’t within ten feet of a prostitute. However, I still feel for those forced in that industry (and not the ‘I needed the money!’ idiots).
Yeah, because you anything negative about women’s choice or you ‘misogynistic’/‘sexist’/‘oppressive’, which they insult men and call them rapists and perverts for having a sex drive. Equality means both positive and negative things.
It will to some people. What about physical and biological difference do you not get? Penis, testicles. Penetrator, needs release. Vagina, submissive, receiver, not needed. Anything but ‘liberating’.
I’m not going the repeat the ‘choices’ and ‘judgement’ bit again.
I know that. However, our society being so loose with sex, is why it is assumed if you are in a relationship, even unmarried, you must be fucking. And apparently men cannot be uninterested in sex. My boyfriend get that bullshit recently as well. I wouldn’t even french kiss. We do the non-sexual things of romance. And let's not forget the research on sex and STDs, that wastes money that could be going towards more value things such as medicine and cures. And the waste of resources on sex toys, sex shops, and BDSM stuff.
I’m not ‘justifying’ it. It’s not rape as she had nothing to lose, nothing to take, nothing to violate.
*Sigh*, I already mentioned the bullshit that is the ‘Madonna/Whore Complex”. And most things Freud thought was bullshit. It is nothing more than a man (or woman), respecting themselves, women, and the concepts of romance and marriage. That woman made herself an object already. I am not going to speak out the bullshit that is the ‘double standard’ again. Physical. Differences. Seriously, what is so bloody hard to under?
She is no place to judge another’s sexual needs and wants. They are not ‘women’, they are girls.
Devious Comments
However, research on sex and STDs are important as people are directly connected and influenced by these
Sexual health is interconnected with many important medical fields of research. Research for medicines and cures have already a considerable support relative to political policies among states.
In the case of rape, the matter should be focused on the behaviors or the perpetrator and victim to better analyses the situation in order to punish the perpetrator and help the victim.
You are still redundant, how can you say you don't believe in the Madonna/Whore Complex if you are supporting sexual double standards?
I acknowledge there are sexual differences, but such differences does not declare anyone the uke and seme. that is a social construction.
When I mention "sex Trafficker" it was because these motherfuckers understand how virginity is important in order to sell these girls at higher prices, which puts these motherfuckers to be the worst types of human beings.
If our societies are becoming sexually more active, that's because people no longer have a biased and narrow-minded definition of sex, gender, and sexuality. Is that bad? If wisely used, it's positive for human progress.
I respect people who want to be and/or are asexual, the thing is we have to acknowledge that we live in a complex world and we truly need to analyze as carefully and unbiased as possible moral and ethical issues.
It’s your own damn fault if you get an STD, just as it would be your own of you became sick eating rotten food, or rare meat or poisonous berries. Deal with it yourself. That money could also be going towards building homes, both at home and in Third World countries as well.
Why, a few people, like dear little Sandra Fluke expected the public to pay for contraception. I may not like him, but Rush Limbaugh was very correct in calling her a slut and a prostitute.
Oh, and therein lays another misandric standard: that female-only spaces are ok, especially in gyms in case they are ‘ogled’ and ‘objectified’. Oh, the horror! And would it be ok for a lesbian to ogle you? Those men are usually to busy exercising. And again, women are free to ogle men and it's not misandric or sexist.Take the Coke advert with the guy mowing the lawn, for example, and the Cadbury Crisplo one. One woman said it was saying it is was ok to go after a younger woman, that she is being 'objectified' when the girl was clearly going after her boyfriend's dad. And when I told woman that, she basically said 'a young woman can't rape an older man'. Again, sorry to get off topic, but my mind is like that.
However, male-only spaces are ‘PRUF DAT TEH PATRIACHY STIL ECISTS!!!!”.
Of course, but we should understand that, while the rape is always the perpetrator’s fault, the victim (male or female) is still putting themselves in a vulnerable position, by getting drunk, not watching their drink for example. I am not ‘blaming the victim’, I am just saying that, in a world of equality, everyone takes responsibility to keep themselves or others safe. However, I do also understand that you can be the most responsible person in the world and still have that happen to you. It just reduces your chance of suffering.
*Facepalm* THERE IS NO BLOODY ‘DOUBLE STANDARD’! Sorry, but you’re still being thick in regards to this.
Where the hell do you think seme and uke came from? It is not this ‘social construction’ rubbish? It physically works that way. Unless it is pegging, it is that way. There is nothing wrong with a man wanting a virgin wife. It is not ‘sexist’, ‘misogynistic’, or ‘oppressive’. As I just said, it about a man respecting himself, woman, and romance/marriage. They want a woman who will with them and them alone. They are not trying to ‘control’ women (they are allowed themselves to be controlled by lust and penis). They want that first time to be not-so-good and clumsy, as I read one man saying. I’m sure no one would bat an eyelid a woman (or a man) wanting a virgin husband.
That’s true. However, for me, rapists, animal/child abusers (which I suppose would in include those) and murderers deserve the death penalty. Too bad it was banned decades ago here
It is not ‘narrow’ to respect oneself and their love life. Yes, it is good that homosexuality, asexuality and transgenderism are gradually being more accepted, such ‘freedom’ has also led to more STDs, more money being wasted, and again, general selfishness. This is a little of topic, but: perhaps we can even more on from men in dresses 'trannies' as well, since no cares with a woman wears a suit and tie. I believe it is ridiculous to gender a piece of fabric for its shape. Beside, this is another thing, along with pink and blue, that was the other way around. I keep wondering who it came to swap.
*Sigh* Again, I agree. I am a very political person after all.
There is no sense of building infrastructures if no one will occupy them due to poor health and bad prevention.
Rush Limbaugh is only correct when it comes to the public paying for contraceptives, but he demonstrates to be a misogynist by judging her so quickly. Contraceptives have a medical function, that of regulating menstrual cycles if their bodies do not take care of that.
I believe only those kinds of emergency contraceptives should be supported due to their medical reasons
"A younger woman cannot rape an older guy", men can be raped too, you know, the effects are different.
It is true that both the victim and victimizer should be held accountable in order to know the truth as much as possible, but Justice has the punish the perpetrator and formulate rational ways, without biases, to avoid these situations. Many countries had very stupid solutions that are always centered on using the victims to avoid looking at the reality of the problem. (In Gorontalo-Indonesia, women cannot wear dresses that show skin, this being influenced by Muslim morale rather than rationality). Did rapes and sexual harassment cases decreased? nope, these actually had a slight increase. That is misogyny, when you put the blame on women only. These people failed on recognizing that the perpetrators were a huge part of the problem and at fault of this is by believing in the Sexual supremacy of Men.
This is why sexual equality is important and vital, it helps both genders to understand none cannot overpower the other
Social constructions are rubbish and useless, more based on fictitious expectations rather than factual reason
It is not ethical if a "sexually experienced" man requires his future wife to be a "virgin", unless the girl accepts. that is not what equality is about, it is not fair, but like I said again, if the girl accepts him, that's her deal. If we are in such a context, then it is fair and reasonable for "Sexually-Experienced" women to marry a "Virgin" boy, just as both "Virgins" and Sexually-experienced" individuals can do so, there is no ethical and moral problem.
I don't support Death Penalties because we are letting these bastards to have an easy escape, I want them to suffer hell in earth first, to have the punishment fit the crime.
I agree it is not "narrow" to respect your love life, but it depends on the substance within the flask.
Oh, I’m guessing your referring to the HIV/AIDs dangers? I had forgotten of that.
Oh, no, how dare a man criticize an all mighty-vagina owner. Yet again, woman are allowed to insult men sexually and grope all they like. She clearly is a slut if she’s having such sex she can afford the contraception. And paying someone pay for your sex sessions is prostitution. You are paying someone to have sex.
No, no, no. I was telling what the other person, though I will refrain from mentioning her name. I believe that anyone can anyone of any gender, orientation or age.
Indeed. As people say “don’t teach a woman to not get raped. Teach a man not rape’. However in itself is sexist/a little homophobic, as it assumes all victims are female and all attackers male. Men make up a fair amount of rape victims, near half in some places, but it seems so low that because most men are afraid to report it, and they will always be ridiculed.
However, if one is wearing clothing meant to display the body in a sexual manner, and if she is so ‘confident in your body’, then you have no right to complain or call men rapists/perverts/pigs for having a sex drive. And again, they are allowed to fawn and giggle over men’s muscles, and butts, and whatnot.
It is not‘misogynistic’ , it is ‘sexist’. Misogynistic is the hatred of women. Even if it is sexual, the person say things like that is just saying what they think will keep people more safe, as misguided the attitude is. The intention is good, but the method not.
The thing about dresses is bloody ridiculous. Unless someone had some kind of fetish, who is going to be turned on by naked arms or legs?
Well, I’m sorry, but I can’t see heterosexual intercourse any other way. However, I do believe it can a romantic thing. I truly do, but it is also a great commitment for someone. The same goes for same-sex relationship of course.
I’m not explaining it again.
I used to think like that, but do you not dislike the fact that your tax money is keeping them alive? Yes, the whole ‘we don’t want to suffer’ is disgusting. What about the people or animals they made suffer. The person who’s body they violated, the person who took an innocent’s life. They need to suffer as much as their victims did, have it etched into their minds before they go to hell. Yes, there has sadly been many a mischarge of justice, but surely forensics have advanced to the point where it would hard to convict the wrong person.
As in personality?
Both genders can practice their sexualities in the ways they prefer (without stepping out of moral and ethical lines)
The rule is to live and let live.
Teaching people to not do horrible things to each other (both genders), will contribute to the reduction of rapes and sexual harassment. it is for both genders and parties to play the part and cooperate
On the death penalty, for bad news, society is very lenient in the way of treating criminals, it is a complicated issue indeed
Well of course.
Again, of course.
Yes, but again, we cannot get rid of the typical attitudes completely. For example, in roughly…fifty years’ time (I’m just trying to be realistic, judging from how long it took women to gain most of their rights), men will be fully accepted as victims of abuse and rape.
Um-hm. Oh, I’m not saying that we should start bringing back public executions. That would endanger the public and cause suffering for the perpetrator’s family (unless they are the cause or were involved the perpetrator’s crimes, I believe they should be treated with the same respect as the victim’s loved ones). I just think we give them too much. However, I still believe they should have rights to books and art (recently my wonderful government tried to ban families bringing books, and books entirely, and later on art). I am very big on justice, but no-one, not even criminals or those in asylums, should be derived of the written word. Nor should art be banned. Yes, the things these…people…have created are disturbing, but, obviously, that also gives us in an insight into their mind. Yes, unless we are those ourselves, we can never completely understand the mind of such an individual, but research still should be done.
Oh, and another important issue in that regard is famed people, celebrities, being treated more better and given more lenient sentences.
There I went, off topic again. I’m just a very political person, you see.
Women and men need to redefine the concepts of what is masculine and what is feminine, our generation is a wonderful mosaic in comparison to older generations. We embody the complexity of human nature, not based of natural laws and social laws, but on our individuality and uniqueness. However I do believe our generation needs the value of social responsibility and drive for improvement.
simply open your mind to new theories and ideas, and through them built your mosaic
Have you noticed I how wonderful is to discuss and have an open mind? Humans have the need for mental enrichment
Well, I don’t think we should label femininity or masculinity as ‘acting like a woman/man”. We should just think of them as traits, and which traits we perfer or display. And most of us are a mixture of both, anyway, as I am guessing you agree from the last sentence.
Yes, I do. Anyone would perfer it to arguing. Yes, I like having a good, pleasant conversation as much as any person, but sometimes, debate is good for learning or practicing communication.
We have put our ideas to the table and explained them in quite long comments as you will see
But hey, it exercises the the mind to understand oneself and be open to new ideas, aye?
Indeed. And I do so enjoy long comments I can think about and have to take time and thinking to respond to.
Aye, sur. I'm getting to be a little more open with each of the better conversations.
Though you have every right to, I'm just disappointed that even though we are typing so calmly and eloquently to one another, you still insult me in your conversations with that lassie. And I don't block so fast nor, have any reason to block you. I only block spammers and invaders (people who jump onto your profile to leave insults).
Have you notice that in the later comments I stopped insulting?
After that, there were critiques with no informal insulting
This happen many days ago, actually, there is no longer a need to insult, and that feeling took place days ago
We showed each others' views eloquently with not much results, only having a truce of "agree to disagree"
But it's OK, these type of conversations are the ones that wake up my brain fully, it is good for the soul to inquire
I suppose I did not notice, but…not consciously?
Oh, good
Well, yes, but I hope I have at least made some progress, not against you, but rather, for me.
Yes, sorry to add on again, but it keeps life interesting.
She's really so misogynistic as to say that a woman is in part to blame if they get sexually harassed because they are confident with their body??
It doesn't matter what the woman is wearing, a man ought to have enough self control to respect another person. Never is an outfit grounds to harass anybody. I see a handsome man dressed in an admirable way but do I ever go up and start touching him? Fuck no. That's completely inappropriate in societal standards and in regards to his personal space and feelings.
Women shouldn't have to hide themselves because some people can't control themselves and men shouldn't either. We should all have the self control and moral to not harass anybody just because they're dressed nicely or revealing.
By her standards, everybody should go to the pool or beach in pants and long sleeved shirts >_>
It shouldn't be one or the other responsibility, it's BOTH sides responsibility to behave with restraint and respect.
If somebody, man or woman, sees somebody passed out or very drunk, it's their responsibility to behave like a moral and respectful person and not take advantage.
Even if that other person isn't doing so, SOMEBODY ought to. Just because somebody else is being irresponsible, that doesn't justify others to be as well.
Never is it okay to take advantage of somebody who is incapacitated. Doing so makes you a pervert with no self control or respect.
As adults, it's our job to behave responsibly even if others are not. That's what being an adult is.
In regards to sex, she truly is ignorant about it if she thinks all STDs have obvious signs and that everybody is honest about having one. This simply proves that.
Even if people were to follow her sick little values, a virgin woman could hook up with a man who has had previous partners and he could give her an STD because he lied about it/didn't tell her, the symptoms were not present and/or he didn't know he had one because some people are just carriers.
So now that woman has to suffer an STD even though she followed Naokos ridiculous rules and because in her little world, researching and treating STD is 'a waste' and in her world, a woman isn't allowed to be choosy about the men she hooks up with, only men are allowed to be choosy so she can't tell him no just because he's had partners before her.
I wonder what she'd have to say to that!
It is not 'taking advantage' if the drunken person is all over the other person.
As for STDs, no I do not think that. Again you all assume that because I am aversed to sex and will never be fucked does not mean I am unaware or uneducated in such things. I know perfectly well that some are even completely symptomless. I know people lie too. It's an embarrassing thing, is it not?
She (and so it would be for a he) choose to have sex and risk it. You cannot choose to have cancer (for the most person'), Leukaemia, asthma, psoriasis, AIDs/HIV, cystic fibrosis, Huntington’s disease, cerebral palsy, Down's Syndrome, epilepsy, Kleine-Levin syndrome, OVD, etc. Sorry to list such common ailments, but I was given you an idea. I even know that virgins can have some form of STD when they haven't so much as masturbated.
Make up your damn mind. Is the world wrong for shaming sexual men or is the world wrong for shaming virgin men? Nobody is shaming anybody. I for one don't give a damn if whoever I'm with is a virgin or not. I do like a virgin man because they're more eager and not so quick to become bored like sexual men and that's my right to prefer virgin men. I can be choosy all I want. My body, I get to choose who touches it and who I have sex with.
No duh it's going to elicit certain feelings but when men start to cat call and touch that's inappropriate. Men are adults who should know how to behave despite how they're feeling. They're expected to behave maturely when they're pissed off, they're expected to behave maturely when they see a nice body or a nice pair or legs or what have you.
It's not hypocritical to dress in shorts and a tanktop when it's 95 degrees f and expect men to not bother you over it. I dunno how hot it gets there but here in Oklahoma, you can literally fry an egg on your cars dashboard so I should be able to go out in my shorts and tank and not have to stress over men trying to touch me (in any way) or cat call and make inappropriate remarks.
It's not a woman's job to put up with men, it's a man's job to not behave like a pig to begin with.
Some women don't or can't handle those situations so it's unfair to them to have to put up with that kind of thing just because you think they have it coming because they wore shorts or a skirt and a top that shows some skin.
They have the right to find a woman attractive but it's inappropriate to make that woman feel uncomfortably in the outfit she has the right to wear. No woman should have to dress a certain way just to avoid piggish behavior.
If somebody is drunk and another person takes advantage of that, that's completely scummy. If a drunk person comes onto somebody who is sober, that, to me, seems a lot less scummy since the person being approached is fully capable of making decisions though the person doing the approaching might not have ordinarily done such a thing.
No, actually. Nobody is assuming you're uneducated about sex because you're asexual.
We say you are uneducated about sex because of the things you have said yourself and are still saying.
It's not about your sexuality. Seriously, get over it already. Nobody cares that you're asexual. People care that you're trying to stomp on female reproductive/sexual rights.
Exactly what kind of STD does a virgin get?
By your silly set of rules, a woman is condemned even if she has sex with one man who has had partners before her (which you say is allowed) and has an STD that is passed to her.
You call researching sex and the diseases a waste of resources but in reality, the aforementioned scenario is common. In your little world, she would be doomed to suffer an STD even though she followed your rules because in your world, no research would be done to find treatments and/or cures.
If that man left her, she couldn't have sex ever again because of her STD and/or because in your world, she would be cheating on her next boyfriend.
No, it’s not.
No, it’s not. It’s natural and fine. That is shaming. Yes, they do, they are fully aware of they are doing, as I think you would know.
It was your choice to wear those, as needed as it would be. It is the aroused man’s natural reaction in the form of hastily-put together words. It is not ‘inappropriate’ or being a ‘pig’. Again, you should your hypocrisy, in that woman are allowed to be as sexual as they want and no one is permitted a negative opinon, or they are ‘MISOGYNISTS!’, ‘SEXISTS!’ or ‘OPPRESSORS!!!!’. Again, they have no right to complain of being ‘bothered’ when they have already objectified themselves. I, along with other virgin woman, have a right to complain about that as we are not hypocrites, and we are in full control of our bodies.
Then maybe she should grow a backbone.
It is called equality. If girls are permitted to be as sexual as they want, so are men. And people are allowed a negative opinion on that. Non-virgin woman are hypocrites to judge and complain.
No, it’s not. It is not someone else’s job to stop or look after that drunk person, who choose to get drunk, unless they have requested such. Of course, if I were ever to have friends like that (I never would), I would not just abandon them like some holidaymakers and partygoers do, but I would let them make their own mistakes and learn the hard way. We all make mistakes.
Urgh, again with this. I am expressing my right to an opinion, on one’s choice, as is my right. I am not sitting there whining about freedom of speech and truth equality like you faux-feminists who think all sexual women are perfect, ‘liberated’ beings. If I were to get behind the wheel of a car and went barrelling down the motorway, I would know I would be judged and insulted. That would be someone’s right to do so. If I were to write something in my original story is incredibly narmy, far too cliché, or just plain stupid, I would be judged for it, and people would be free to it. Sex is no different. What is so bloody hard to understand about that, ‘feminist’?
You lot also constantly assume that the sex thing is my whole life and think me some heartless idiot, when, if you had actually read my journals and got to know me, would know I have other interests and pursuits, and hold empathy and care within me. You assume I know not of simple things like masturbation, wet dreams, arousal, orgasms, dominatrixes (even if she is ‘dominant’, it is in a typically false, feminine manner, such as that of the femme fatale, and she usually has been/will let herself be penetrated). While we are of course equals and make choices together, I am dominant as I control myself, and take charge emotionally. I’m it would count for physically as well, as I would be the one to make the protective moves (as I’m not some damsel-in-distress who likes a man being a chauvinist, chivalrous pig). I’m also the one to resort to defensive/arger-caused violence, as well, though I know most would not consider that a good thing. And the stereotypical kind of violent of slapping. Finally, as I said, we kiss, hug and hold each other.
Oral herpes, for one. You can also gain diseases from towels or toilet seats, given that people have done things on them (that, combined with my great mysophobia), keeps from public bathrooms as much as possible.
Ok, the thing about her never having sex again is understandable, if she was planning to have a baby some time. That would not be fair.
You say 99% of the female side of the human race deserves rape. That's pretty heartless to me.
If you don't think women deserve it that's good but you come across as very hateful. If a woman was raped, virgin or not, a normal person would feel compassion and horror,. It doesn't matter if she is s virgin or what she's wearing or if she's germy or anything. It's horrible and traumatic no matter what. But you don't seem to care at all if it happens to be someone you deem a 'slut' this is heartless. If it happened to a woman (or man) you don't say she's a hypocrite for complaining you help her and try to get justice for what's happened.
If you want people to leave you alone try turning around. Try saying, or at least consider non-virgins are people too and aren't some evil germy sex-crazed zombies trying to hurt men or oppress them. I don't know why you think that.
Thank you for separating yourself from these…others.
I do feel compassion – for those who are actually suffering. I feel no sympathy for hypocrites getting their karma and not understand that that trauma and pain they suffer is them realizing and regretting throwing themselves at a man for no good reason.
I am not ‘heartless’ and have mentioned numerous times the evidence that proves I am not, reasons that apply to yourselves too, I’m certain – I give to charity, I really want to help the poor in person, I fight for men and women’s rights, I fight against the dismissal and humiliation of male abuse and rape victims. I fight for GLBT rights, of course. I am a political person and try to fight, or at least bring attention to, injustice in the political world. Those others keep judging me and thinking they know me when they know nothing of me, and keep spouting the same clichés and pseudo-intelligent babble.
Again, it is their attitude. They will not stop whinging about people’s right to an opinion on their choice, so why should others stop having that rightful, just opinion? And they are germy, like it or not. We are all germy. Non-virgin woman, due to the way sex works, be it hetero or homosexual, just carry that little bit more.
They are people, then. Just very immature people. They are girls.
And non-virgins contain these attributes so often... why? Why do you see them all like that?
"would not need to be so hard if they were not such whiney little wimps dressing up their whinging and fear of judgment as ‘feminism’. "
You seem to be hung up on the whole "feminism" word. Why not scribble it out and replace the word with "women who want the same things men get while men get what women have." and tell me why that's so bad. It seems fair to me.
"I do feel compassion – for those who are actually suffering. I feel no sympathy for hypocrites getting their karma and not understand that that trauma and pain they suffer is them realizing and regretting throwing themselves at a man for no good reason. "
And this exception to your compassion is why people are getting upset at you. There shouldn't be any exception at all. A woman isn't hurting anyone by having a sexual relationship with anyone (a man, woman, inbetween, or herself) unless she is raping someone. Why is it karma that she get's hurt so severely then? How can you not feel bad for someone who goes through something so horrible? Even if what a woman was doing was wrong, that's like saying someone who steals deserves torture, it's beyond extreme.
"I am not ‘heartless’ and have mentioned numerous times the evidence that proves I am not, reasons that apply to yourselves too, I’m certain – I give to charity, I really want to help the poor in person, I fight for men and women’s rights, I fight against the dismissal and humiliation of male abuse and rape victims. I fight for GLBT rights, of course. I am a political person and try to fight, or at least bring attention to, injustice in the political world. "
Well, yeah, okay. That may be true. And I couldn't really say you were some ruthless monster out of the pits of hell even without you saying that. It still doesn't make what you're saying about non-virgins right though.
Thing is, try looking it from other's point of view. Take homophobia, which you are adamant against. If some homophobic guy went on some hate-speech saying gay men who get bashed are only getting God's will and it's what they get for defiling their bodies with some evil sin or whatever nonsense a homophobic person says, what are you going to do? Call him out on what he's saying? Call him a bad person? What if he turns around at these accusations, and says "But I'm not a bad person, I donate to charity, I fight against racism, etc etc.." would you, should you, say "Jinkies! I had no idea! You're a swell guy after all! Just let me turn my back and allow you to continue on with your little hate speech!" Or would you say "That's all very well and nice, but what you're doing is still wrong and you really should stop."
"Those others keep judging me and thinking they know me when they know nothing of me, and keep spouting the same clichés and pseudo-intelligent babble.
"
That pseudo-intellectual babble is others trying to reason with you. But you're right, they don't know you, no-body does, they are making judgements based on what they have observed so far. But you can help by letting them or others get to know you, and you try getting to know them and other non-virgins and see that they aren't so bad people. Maybe a bit more reasoning on what your problem is/ are, because (I admit this is just a guess) some of your dislike might be stemming from something that happened to you IRL. Maybe some girl was a bitch to you, maybe your Dad was a jerk, IDK. And they have been guessing, because they want to know why you have all this hate, or "dislike".
"Again, it is their attitude. They will not stop whinging about people’s right to an opinion on their choice, so why should others stop having that rightful, just opinion?"
Well yeah, we all have our right to free-speech. They have theirs and you have yours. It's just kind of getting a bit of conflict regarding the nature of their arguing: rape. Which is a serious form of violence, which nobody wants. And you don't want someone around encouraging violence, do you? They don't want some rape victim seeing what you wrote and getting hurt, or some psycho reading this and getting the idea it's okay to rape someone.
"And they are germy, like it or not. We are all germy. Non-virgin woman, due to the way sex works, be it hetero or homosexual, just carry that little bit more. "
So?
We can argue whether or not non-virgins are germy (and frankly I'm stumped why you would think a girl who jills off gets "germy", or at least germy in the manner it can't be washed off or cause a serious illness). But in the end, so what? People who work with sewage are germy. People in poorer countries are germy. Lots of people are germy. Pilots are at risk of getting who knows how many diseases. Should they be looked down upon for eg. say their choices in career etc? Should they be treated any less? Does it mean they should be attacked and that it serves them right, or that it serves them right if they contract a serious illness that it's just "karma" and no-one should help them?
"They are people, then. Just very immature people. They are girls. "
Once again, So? Lots of people are immature. I'm immature a lot of the time. It's no reason to not feel bad for them when they get raped.
But it is not that. They want to be free from all rightful, equality-supporting judgement and criticism will they scream at men for doing so much as harmless wolf whistling, while they call men perverts and rapists for daring to express their sexuality. And most laughably of all, they say, that men being sexually attracted to them, is ‘misogynistic’. I fight for actually rights, something few feminists do nowadays, continuing to add to our reputation. As a result, people who support men’s rights too are told to call themselves ‘humanists’. Don’t get wrong, I don’t mind the title, but the problem is that feminist is seen as a bad thing, and girls like this are not helping.
Yes she is. She is spreading germs and most likely disease as well. She is insulting feminism and naturalness of pregnancy. If I were stolen from if I steal before, I would have no reason to complain, no non-virgin women have nothing to complain about. I understand that some easily-offended people might be upset about this, being that it is true equality (taking responsibility for one’s actions, instead of calling it ‘victim blaming’. but I simply do not support hypocrisy. And yes, I know we are all hypocrites. If she was engaged or marriage and that happened, even if she had sex with her fiancé, husband or wife, as she has made a commitment to someone.
Well, thank you. Well, I’m sorry, but it is just the way I think, and it is made worse because of these selfish attitudes that exist. If a woman were to just have sex for pleasure with her partner, behind closed doors, that would be fine, they are not affection anyone else. It is when they scream about non-existent ‘double standards’, while ignoring the biological logical behind such a (perfectly allowed) opinon, and say that having casual sex is good, and, as I said, shoving their non-virginity and so-called ‘liberation’ (when it is far from it) down everyone’s throats, instead of focusing on real issues. A good ‘feminist blog’ I have found is The Mary Sue, for example. She cares about women and men and fights against bigger issues (as well as sexism in pop culture/fiction, something seen as trivial and meaningless, despite how much it effects and has effected real life).
The difference is, having recreational heterosexual intercourse is a choice. Homosexuality, no matter what some cunts say, is not a choice. It is natural attraction to the same gender. Yes, heterosexual lust and attraction is natural too I know. It is just that homosexual intercourse is far less likely to be selfish (that’s not to say there is not homosexual manipulators or rapists). I also understand that homosexuals are not perfect, as well, but that they are simply human, and humans judge and are judged, make choices, sometimes stupid/pointless/selfish ones.
No, no, if someone wants to have a calm conversation about it, then I am happy. Just as I would be happy to have a conversation with a homophobe is understand why they think (well, if it were reasons outside ‘it’s an abomination!’ or ‘God says so!’).
Those are the very clichés, though. That it was thought it by religion, that I was molested/raped, or (and I laughed at this) dumped for a sexually active girl. You say it is because of my mother or my ‘father’ that I have ‘daddy issues’ (
They also came out with crap that Matt is only with me as he hopes to get sex one day, and that we won’t last because we don’t have sex and that ‘when his balls drop’ he dump me for someone else, even though they are plenty of non-sexual ways to be romantic. We kiss on the lips, for example. They know nothing of our relationship, how long we’ve known each other (and when I explained such, of course they did not believe me, and continued with their perceived image of me), while being all smug about their ‘normal’ and not ‘shallow’ relationships.
Well, as I’ve said before, no matter how much we wash down there, we will still produce natural but disgusting fluids. You can’t ‘wash off’ one of biggest changes in your life (and that fact is that is considered something so little nowadays is so…cold). No, those are needed, as they need those jobs to live, or to enjoy life, and those germs, bar the sewage, are not so intimate.
Oh, and I never thought non-virgins were not human. I was just sick of the rage so I threw out a sarcastic comment. Again, it’s the hypocrisy bit. I at least acknowledge the ways in wish I am hypocritical, an example being I am and consider myself a strong woman, but insult that but my needless crying. I don’t like boastful or cocky people, but like most people, I boast sometimes as well. Again, an overused statement, but we are human.
“I do not see them all like that. They are just what I encounter most when simply browsing for me own means, some whiney little flower on Tumblr, Feminsite, Jezebel, LiveJournal This Slut Votes, the SlutWalk bullshit that is still going on, an affront to feminism (it just made our reputation fall even lower), and self respecting women everywhere.”
And why are you going to those sites in the first place?
“This very deviation (along with many, selfish, sexist, petty others) is an example of such an attitude. This being the ‘anti-abortion is ANTI-WOMENZ!” when they turn around and be completely anti-responsibility, anti-male, and selfish. They claim that medical and necessary ultrasound (yes, it is necessary, to make sure the woman is absolutely willing to murder something she once was in one of the greatest acts of hypocrisy there can be), when they already been penetrated by a germ-riddled penis. There is nothing ‘sexist’, ‘misogynistic’ or ‘controlling women’s bodies’ or ‘reproductive rights’. It is hypocrisy, they already gave their body to another. “
Because you know it is their own body which they own (and still own no matter who they have sex with), and have a right to preserve their own life if a pregnancy might risk her life or a possible child’s well-being. And yeah it is irresponsible if a woman goes around screwing willy nilly without protection. But it’s waaay more irresponsible to bring a life into the world where the woman has neither the finances nor the competence to look after a child which ends up with a kid starving to death in a cupboard in a pile of its own faeces because the mother knows squat about raising children. An abortion on the other hand is terminating a “life” before it begins a life of suffering. And just because an embryo was what each of us where at that point doesn’t mean we should preserve it. We were an ovum once, does that mean every time a woman has her period she is committing murder?
“But it is not that. They want to be free from all rightful, equality-supporting judgement and criticism will they scream at men for doing so much as harmless wolf whistling, while they call men perverts and rapists for daring to express their sexuality. And most laughably of all, they say, that men being sexually attracted to them, is ‘misogynistic’. I fight for actually rights, something few feminists do nowadays, continuing to add to our reputation. As a result, people who support men’s rights too are told to call themselves ‘humanists’. Don’t get wrong, I don’t mind the title, but the problem is that feminist is seen as a bad thing, and girls like this are not helping.”
If a guy (or a girl) is running around in the privacy of her home oogling over porn or something, this is expressing their sexuality and these girls should mind their own business. If a guy (or a girl) is out on the streets harassing someone this isn’t expressing their sexuality, they’re being a jerk, and it’s what people do to rile people up. I mean, you didn’t like it when you started getting all this attention lately, and you complained, why can’t they? But no, someone “wolf-whistling” isn’t a rapist. They may be over-reacting, but then, what have you been doing lately on certain other sites?
“Yes she is. She is spreading germs and most likely disease as well.”
Not if she’s getting the guy to wear a rubber, she isn’t. Or, you know, jilling off on her own (who would she be spreading the “germs” to?). Or people who get blood tests first, to make sure they haven’t got anything before they do anything.
If she knew she had something and intentionally spread something, yeah, that would be wrong though. Most of the time though, people try to stop the spread of disease.
“She is insulting feminism and naturalness of pregnancy.”
And an insult is seriously harmful, because…?
“If I were stolen from if I steal before, I would have no reason to complain, no non-virgin women have nothing to complain about.”
Ummm, no no no no. Stealing can’t even begin to equate with something like rape. Stealing is a petty crime (which is why I gave an example before), while rape is extreme violence, and there is never any excuse for it. And why would consensual sex be considered stealing? Because she gave her body once to a guy and it belongs to him now? That’s like saying people have the right to steal then vandalise e a bunch of books from a library which lends out books just because it some people have borrowed from it before.
You don’t get a book from a library to keep forever, you RETURN it. And you don’t damage it, because it still isn’t your property. You take it for an allotted period of time with your library card, enjoy it, then give it back. If you don’t, or take the book without permission, you’re in trouble, and the librarian has every right to send you a fine. And as such, if a man or woman rapes a person they should be punished for it as no-one has the right to have sex without someone’s consent.
“I understand that some easily-offended people might be upset about this, being that it is true equality (taking responsibility for one’s actions, instead of calling it ‘victim blaming’. but I simply do not support hypocrisy. And yes, I know we are all hypocrites. If she was engaged or marriage and that happened, even if she had sex with her fiancé, husband or wife, as she has made a commitment to someone.”
Commitments can end. And committing to one person does not mean committing to every other single male on the planet for the rest of eternity.
“Well, thank you. Well, I’m sorry, but it is just the way I think, and it is made worse because of these selfish attitudes that exist. If a woman were to just have sex for pleasure with her partner, behind closed doors, that would be fine, they are not affection anyone else.”
Which is what “non-virgins” do. (Or should be doing).
“It is when they scream about non-existent ‘double standards’, while ignoring the biological logical behind such a (perfectly allowed) opinon, and say that having casual sex is good, and, as I said, shoving their non-virginity and so-called ‘liberation’ (when it is far from it) down everyone’s throats, instead of focusing on real issues. A good ‘feminist blog’ I have found is The Mary Sue, for example. She cares about women and men and fights against bigger issues (as well as sexism in pop culture/fiction, something seen as trivial and meaningless, despite how much it effects and has effected real life).”
Abortion is a real issue though.
“The difference is, having recreational heterosexual intercourse is a choice. Homosexuality, no matter what some cunts say, is not a choice. It is natural attraction to the same gender. Yes, heterosexual lust and attraction is natural too I know. It is just that homosexual intercourse is far less likely to be selfish (that’s not to say there is not homosexual manipulators or rapists). I also understand that homosexuals are not perfect, as well, but that they are simply human, and humans judge and are judged, make choices, sometimes stupid/pointless/selfish ones.”
How is heterosexual sex selfish? “Germs”? Once again you have condoms and blood-tests for that. Pregnancy? Okay, if homosexual sex is better because it can’t result in pregnancy, what about women who are infertile. Women who have gone past menopause? Girls who are above legal age but haven’t finished puberty (it’s 2-3 years after a girl starts bleeding before she starts ovulating). A woman who is on her period? Women who use contraceptives? None of these will result in pregnancy either so why not group them with homosexuals too?
“No, no, if someone wants to have a calm conversation about it, then I am happy. Just as I would be happy to have a conversation with a homophobe is understand why they think (well, if it were reasons outside ‘it’s an abomination!’ or ‘God says so!’).”
Okay
“Those are the very clichés, though. That it was thought it by religion, that I was molested/raped, or (and I laughed at this) dumped for a sexually active girl. You say it is because of my mother or my ‘father’ that I have ‘daddy issues’ (
I couldn’t care less about my ‘father’, and I was barely a year old when my mother left him), and my mother, like all good parents, taught me and give me the tools to learn, but let me think for myself. It is those attitudes (the father/rape thing) that annoys me.”
It was a guess. People come up with these things because your ideas had to come from somewhere. I don’t get it though. You just one day (or took a while to come up with this) decided to say “non-virgins can’t be raped”?
“They also came out with crap that Matt is only with me as he hopes to get sex one day, and that we won’t last because we don’t have sex and that ‘when his balls drop’ he dump me for someone else, even though they are plenty of non-sexual ways to be romantic. We kiss on the lips, for example. They know nothing of our relationship, how long we’ve known each other (and when I explained such, of course they did not believe me, and continued with their perceived image of me), while being all smug about their ‘normal’ and not ‘shallow’ relationships.”
I’m kind of guessing it was to get you riled up. And in some cases out there this does happen in relationships. People change. Your BF might change. YOU might change. It might be something to keep in mind, at least as a mental exercise. And no, no-one knows how you and your BF are, that’s your businesses’.
“Well, as I’ve said before, no matter how much we wash down there, we will still produce natural but disgusting fluids.”
It isn’t that disgusting.
“You can’t ‘wash off’ one of biggest changes in your life (and that fact is that is considered something so little nowadays is so…cold). No, those are needed, as they need those jobs to live, or to enjoy life, and those germs, bar the sewage, are not so intimate. “
Except we do need sex to enjoy life. I mean, why should I or any women go every minute every day every year for the rest of their lives never getting any relief from an irritating cramp or burning down there for? Why put up with that?
“Oh, and I never thought non-virgins were not human. I was just sick of the rage so I threw out a sarcastic comment. Again, it’s the hypocrisy bit. I at least acknowledge the ways in wish I am hypocritical, an example being I am and consider myself a strong woman, but insult that but my needless crying. I don’t like boastful or cocky people, but like most people, I boast sometimes as well. Again, an overused statement, but we are human.”
What do you expect, you were talking about rape.
No, they have not right to be selfish, hypocritical monsters. They were a foetus once, they were once that ‘parasite’, that ‘accident’, that ‘mistake’, that [insert other, sick, disgusting words for an innocent life here]. Every thing on the planet is technically a parasite, as we must feed on another living thing to survive (most plants are perhaps the expection). Besides, a parasite is defined as a creature of other species. No, it was irresponsible for her to go sleeping around full stop. Pregnancy does not to be ‘protected’ from. Nor is it an ‘accident’ or ‘unwanted’. If it was, that woman would not have choosen to have sex. If she could not ‘afford it’ (which is bullshit anyway), or ‘was not ready’ then she would not be ready to have a penis inside her. Pregnancy, apart from childbirth, is nothing compared to sex that came before it. No one can predict the future. My mother given the suggestion to abort me because of my conditions, they said I would never walk, talk, read or write. And I’ve done that and so much more. How would she have known that if she was so selfish (not to mention she wanted a child). If the ‘women’ (or stupid, selfish girl) really is so heartless and inhuman, then she can find another family to give the child to. It is not ‘selfish’, it is not ‘sexist’, it is not ‘oppressive’ or ‘trying to control women’ (when they have allowed themselves to be controlled by men), it is equality for all. And again, just like others who believe that disgusting, selfish, sexist attitude, you ignore the potential suffering of the man who just lost his child. That’s not utterly sexist, a double standard, and hypocritical or anything. Here we go with the period excuse. That, again, is natural. Simple. Just like pregnancy is.
Not if they are boasting about it and calling it their ‘feminist right’ or whatever. It is not ‘harassment’ or when that girl has already broken that great boundary. She is hypocritical to complain as she is a sexual being. It is natural, as OMG, men have a right to a sex drive as well. I just keep coming back to correct the idiotic assumptions and pettiness of these compete strangers.
As I said, it gives feminism a bad name and encourages selfishness and sexism against men.
It is not ‘extreme’. They are far more extreme things you can do to harm the body, my dear. Rape is not some special crime. It is simply abuse as horrid as any other. Let me give another example then – if I were hit someone who did not deserve it, then I could not complain about someone else striking me, as I’ve already done that. Excluding the marriage/engagement thing I mentioned, that girl is a hypocrite for claiming rape as she had already been penetrated and regardless of the damage, it makes no difference to her status. And I also explained why she is really traumatized, but again, that is not make the mental suffering any less real.
That’s not what I meant. What I meant is, if a virgin woman became engaged or married someone, male or female, and even if they were to have sex with them, they could still be raped, as they have made a commitment to someone and that violator is also violating the commitment. As for the other bit, if a virgin woman were to have sex with a man/woman and commit to them, then for some reason they break up (I’m not saying it is her fault), and she get manages to get a relationship with another man or woman, she is a hypocrite if she ever claims he or she is ‘cheating’ on or ‘betraying’ her, as she already cheated on them. They just had the kindness and goodness to forgive her (they do that if they pursue the relationship). If that woman was a widow, however, then I suppose it can be considered cheating on the other partner’s part (you know, the whole ‘death do us part’ bit).
Well, they don’t.
No, it is not an ‘issue’. The issue is that it exists for non-rape reasons.
I already explained – the selfishness in regards to pregnancy and the possible betrayal. They have no reason to have sex, but can still chose to if they wish. Again, I never said or implied I would stop anyone making that choice. I am not one of those disgusting people who think a woman who does not want children (again, if she did not, she would not partake in heterosexual intercourse for ‘fun’), or is infertile is horrible person or, sickeningly, ‘broken’. Again, it’s the attitudes I dislike.
I’ve said that before too. As my mother was not one to lie, when I put forth the big baby question at six, she bought me a book (for children) called “Where do I Come From?. Of course, these idiots on here think she ‘traumatized me’ and that a six year old could not possibility understand such a thing. The other parents were like that too, “*gasp* it has nude pictures! That’s obscene!”. And as I learned more in reproduction lessons (what you would call ‘sex ed’, I’m guessing) in science in first and second year, then biology and human biology the rest, I began to formulate my views, as I thought about the way sex worked.
I can safely say I will never be interested in sex. Yes, I might want to get pregnant someday, you never know (but not in the ‘my biological clock is ticking’ kind of way), but I still wholly wish to adopt, but only when I’ve had my life first. I have my friends, my writing, my curiosity, until then. Yes, I’ve stopped judging other people’s non-marital relationships as being more then just sex, so maybe they should stop their stereotyping of mine.
People also think he a ‘doormat’ because he dares do what a woman tells him, and think that he wishes to ‘protect’ or ‘save’ when he’s anything but a chauvinist pig. A certain someone also thinks he’ll agree if anything I see because if not, I would ‘rage’ and thinks that I am also ‘raging’. Another stereotype, as her experiences do not apply to all.
They contain waste products. How can they not be disgusting? And most women don’t exactly look forward to periods.
If you ‘need’ sex (sex is not a ‘need’ unless you are a man unable to come from masturbation or wet dreams), then you are a pretty sad person indeed. What does that say for asexuals?
“I was curious as to what others who claim to be feminists believe. “
Fair enough
“No, they have not right to be selfish, hypocritical monsters. They were a foetus once, they were once that ‘parasite’, that ‘accident’, that ‘mistake’, that [insert other, sick, disgusting words for an innocent life here]. Every thing on the planet is technically a parasite, as we must feed on another living thing to survive (most plants are perhaps the expection). Besides, a parasite is defined as a creature of other species. No, it was irresponsible for her to go sleeping around full stop. Pregnancy does not to be ‘protected’ from. Nor is it an ‘accident’ or ‘unwanted’. If it was, that woman would not have choosen to have sex. If she could not ‘afford it’ (which is bullshit anyway), or ‘was not ready’ then she would not be ready to have a penis inside her. Pregnancy, apart from childbirth, is nothing compared to sex that came before it. No one can predict the future. My mother given the suggestion to abort me because of my conditions, they said I would never walk, talk, read or write. And I’ve done that and so much more. How would she have known that if she was so selfish (not to mention she wanted a child).”
I can see why you place a lot of value in “pro-life” considering your circumstances. Your case was a success story. This doesn’t always happen though, and there a lot of negative experiences out there that people are considering when having an abortion as well. And your case may just have easily have failed. What if you couldn’t walk or talk? What if you couldn’t see at all, and not hear?
What if your mother didn’t know how to raise a child and neglected to look after you? Yeah, like I said, people should be responsible and not get pregnant in the first place if they realise they can’t be parents (and some people are never “ready”). But to expect them to never have sex because of this is a bit much, but I’ll get to that later…
“If the ‘women’ (or stupid, selfish girl) really is so heartless and inhuman, then she can find another family to give the child to.”
You do realise how many orphans there are that never get people to look after them, right? And how rough it is for them, right?
“It is not ‘selfish’, it is not ‘sexist’, it is not ‘oppressive’ or ‘trying to control women’ (when they have allowed themselves to be controlled by men), it is equality for all. And again, just like others who believe that disgusting, selfish, sexist attitude, you ignore the potential suffering of the man who just lost his child. That’s not utterly sexist, a double standard, and hypocritical or anything.”
Thought exercise: what if it was the woman who wanted to keep the child, and the man who wanted her to get the abortion, because he didn’t want the responsibility? Guys do that sometimes, you know.
“Here we go with the period excuse. That, again, is natural. Simple. Just like pregnancy is.”
Miscarriages are natural too.
“Not if they are boasting about it and calling it their ‘feminist right’ or whatever. It is not ‘harassment’ or when that girl has already broken that great boundary. She is hypocritical to complain as she is a sexual being. It is natural, as OMG, men have a right to a sex drive as well. I just keep coming back to correct the idiotic assumptions and pettiness of these compete strangers.”
She has a right to complain. People need to work and study in harassment free environments. And harassment has little to do with sex drive and more to do with the harasser wanting to get a reaction out of the harrassee.
“As I said, it gives feminism a bad name and encourages selfishness and sexism against men. “
Some girls out there do. Maybe these bloggers or whatever are idiots but that doesn’t mean women everywhere who have a sex drive have to put up with men being an ass. It’s wrong for a woman to do that to a man so why not vice versa?
“It is not ‘extreme’. They are far more extreme things you can do to harm the body, my dear. Rape is not some special crime. It is simply abuse as horrid as any other.”
Yes that is true there are worse things. It is still a serious crime though.
“ Let me give another example then – if I were hit someone who did not deserve it, then I could not complain about someone else striking me, as I’ve already done that.”
Hitting someone is a form of harm. Having consensual sex with someone is not a form of harm. It is a reward; the guy and girl (or whatever variation of sexes) are enjoying each other’s company. If someone hit you after you gave them a reward that would be rather unfair wouldn’t it?
“Excluding the marriage/engagement thing I mentioned, that girl is a hypocrite for claiming rape as she had already been penetrated and regardless of the damage, it makes no difference to her status. And I also explained why she is really traumatized, but again, that is not make the mental suffering any less real.”
Her status.
So according to you, never mind the physical trauma, her reproductive (and possibly internal) organs bleeding, the lack of security, the disgust. It’s her status that she has to worry about. If she doesn’t have that, then why worry? Her status is such a precious thing to lose if she gave it up before it’s karma if she gets raped. She should never have given up her “status”. But if she was a virgin who lost her “status”, it’s a horrible atrocity.
Is that seriously what you’re saying?
“That’s not what I meant. What I meant is, if a virgin woman became engaged or married someone, male or female, and even if they were to have sex with them, they could still be raped, as they have made a commitment to someone and that violator is also violating the commitment. As for the other bit, if a virgin woman were to have sex with a man/woman and commit to them, then for some reason they break up (I’m not saying it is her fault), and she get manages to get a relationship with another man or woman, she is a hypocrite if she ever claims he or she is ‘cheating’ on or ‘betraying’ her, as she already cheated on them. They just had the kindness and goodness to forgive her (they do that if they pursue the relationship). If that woman was a widow, however, then I suppose it can be considered cheating on the other partner’s part (you know, the whole ‘death do us part’ bit).”
How can she cheat on him if she at the time didn’t even know him? How do you betray someone you don’t even know? Didn’t you already say you can’t predict the future? What if your BF decides to leave you or you leave him, does that mean you’ve already betrayed the next man (or woman) who loves you?
“Well, they don’t.”
You cannot judge the behaviour of the majority of “non-virgins” based on the opinions of a bunch of bloggers or LJers you found online.
“No, it is not an ‘issue’. The issue is that it exists for non-rape reasons.” It kind of is. It’s discussed on the news or talk shows and magazines quite a bit sometimes.
Just an example: en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Death_of…
“I already explained – the selfishness in regards to pregnancy and the possible betrayal. They have no reason to have sex, but can still chose to if they wish. Again, I never said or implied I would stop anyone making that choice. I am not one of those disgusting people who think a woman who does not want children (again, if she did not, she would not partake in heterosexual intercourse for ‘fun’), or is infertile is horrible person or, sickeningly, ‘broken’. Again, it’s the attitudes I dislike.”
Okay
“I’ve said that before too. As my mother was not one to lie, when I put forth the big baby question at six, she bought me a book (for children) called “Where do I Come From?. Of course, these idiots on here think she ‘traumatized me’ and that a six year old could not possibility understand such a thing. The other parents were like that too, “*gasp* it has nude pictures! That’s obscene!”. And as I learned more in reproduction lessons (what you would call ‘sex ed’, I’m guessing) in science in first and second year, then biology and human biology the rest, I began to formulate my views, as I thought about the way sex worked.”
No offense, but I think you do seem kind of traumatised, but more likely from your “sex-ed”. It might not even be caused by either, but whatever the cause, you simply had some sort of issue with things and people speculated why that would be. And no, you’re not curled up on the bed in a catatonic state, but you seem to be highly concerned with virginity and STD’s and “germy penises” that most people don’t worry about. And yeah I know you go out and do other things and live life. But it has affected you in your behaviour towards others.
“I can safely say I will never be interested in sex. Yes, I might want to get pregnant someday, you never know (but not in the ‘my biological clock is ticking’ kind of way), but I still wholly wish to adopt, but only when I’ve had my life first. I have my friends, my writing, my curiosity, until then. Yes, I’ve stopped judging other people’s non-marital relationships as being more then just sex, so maybe they should stop their stereotyping of mine.
People also think he a ‘doormat’ because he dares do what a woman tells him, and think that he wishes to ‘protect’ or ‘save’ when he’s anything but a chauvinist pig. A certain someone also thinks he’ll agree if anything I see because if not, I would ‘rage’ and thinks that I am also ‘raging’. Another stereotype, as her experiences do not apply to all.”
I’m staying out of that.
“They contain waste products. How can they not be disgusting? And most women don’t exactly look forward to periods.”
Cum? It’s usually clean if a guy or girl washes beforehand and considered a fun and safe product of the body. Some people have even tried consuming it
“If you ‘need’ sex (sex is not a ‘need’ unless you are a man unable to come from masturbation or wet dreams), then you are a pretty sad person indeed. What does that say for asexuals?”
Well, sexual release anyway, I should have said sexual activity. What can I say though, women have needs. It’s like needing to go to the toilet, you can hold it off as you need to be sociably acceptable, but you can’t hold it off forever, and you can’t expect couples and people everywhere to hold it off indefinitely because say they don’t want kids. It’s kind of cruel, don’t you think?
I don’t know what it says about asexuals, I really can’t say. I’m not going to say “OMG you’re missing out on this fun!” As that would be condescending. It would be nice not to not be concerned with “OMG these women should be strong proud honourable virgins!” as that is sort of condescending too.
There would still be ways to live. Everyone deserves a life unless they ruin the life of another. If you have that attitude, what does that say for deafblind children, or children/adults who cannot look after themselves at all (due to a mental condition or underdevelopment). And even when it comes to criminals, I still think they deserve the right to books and art (my government recently tried to ban both). It sounds cheesy, these stories, I know, but real life can be like that sometimes.
Well, then that would be her fault, and if that were the situation, I would hope I was given a better home. Yes, abuse is disgusting no matter what, but many people have risen above such a thing.
Again, they chose to have sex. The intelligent and most responsible thing would be to do that, but I know not everyone can resist lust. She is just selfish if she tries to get rid of it if or when it happens.
Of course I do. And while I know I cannot help them all, if I can at least give one, or two (I would still feel horrible about the children I’ve left behind) a good, loving home, I will had made some difference, even if it is so insignificant and will make no difference over all. It is because people are too selfish to adopt. Yes, you are free to have children the biological way, but I just wish people would consider adopting more. And besides, what’s to stop someone having a child biologically and from adoption. They are just as much your children. Your real parents are those who raise you. ‘Adopted’ should not be a prefix. I’m saying this because I’ve noticed they always separate children in those categories when naming them.
I know of this too, you know. He can walk away, just like the woman can give the child to someone else to raise. However, I am not being sexist here, as he’s is as much of a selfish prick as it would be with the genders the other way around. It takes two to tango, as they say.
Miscarriage is not on purpose, as you just stated. You cannot choose to miscarry. It is a tragic part of nature.
Ok, that is a point, and makes sense.
Urgh. They are not ‘being an ass’. Sure, they are letting themselves get carried away with that natural lust, but it is not evil. Because the man is not penetrated, the man’s body does not change so much. That’s not to say I don’t think lesbians can’t be raped, even if they used a dildo (but you’re kind of bisexual, then). Most men don’t feel pain either, whereas as a woman’s body to needs adjust to something being in there (yes, I know that some woman feel no pain, or have masturbated beforehand, but then you’re a non-virgin anyway). Yes, I know that you can tighten right back up afterwards if you don’t do it again for a while, but it does not change what has happened. I’m not saying that in a sexist way. I’m just saying that sex a big step in life (for men as well) and people treat it as if it is nothing. It can signal a commitment, it can result in the creation of new life, it can make you feel like a different person. Again, I’m not saying that applies to all, but those people who don’t feel even the slightest bit different are in denial.
Again, I never said it was not. Mind you, I tend to judge the severity of a physical or mental violation by how painful it is or what kinds of affects it had on the person’s mind, so I know that does not apply to all.
No, it is hypocrisy. Saying that one man can do all this stuff with you and another suddenly can’t because he’s no that man is hypocrisy because she has already done all that stuff, and it would make no difference doing it again. No, it is hypocrisy. Again, as I said, it makes the trauma no less real, but it is not for those reasons. It is her realising how foolish she was and how she cannot go back to the way things were before (no, not in regards to second partner, but her taking the step too early). She still deserves all the comfort and help she needs.
Again, as she made a commitment to someone, as well as violating her, that person is violating her commitment to that person, and if that person were to reject her afterwards, she or he would be almost as bad as the rapist. I say the same for those sick cunts who break up with someone or dump them because they were raped and therefore ‘someone got there first’. That ‘first’ was not her choice. And it was not really a first in the first place, as she did not consent.
Yes, I did, but that person still rushed in too fast, most likely. Some relationships just don’t work out, and that is a sad thing (I mean that truly, as all that love and connections ended up for naught because something happened). If someone wants to date a girl (or a guy) who has been with another, all the power to them, they are strong people, but it still hypocritical to claim cheating, even if it wasn’t the claimer’s fault that the relationship failed, as she already made a commitment to another.
All of these people are pretty good examples as well, as well those DA stamps and whatnot.
I haven’t had sex with him. It is still be no less sad, but I have not handled my body over to someone else (no, we don’t do the ‘I belong to you and you belong to me’ nonsense).
Yes, people make it in issue, a selfish issues. Incest and rape are not selfish reasons, even if it is still unfair to the new life. There is no hypocrisy or selfishness there.
“I also support it because of equality. Equality for all. And while it is not the reason why, I am also sick of the ‘feminists’ who scream that being anti-abortion is automatically ‘anti-women’ no matter what. Another example is a old secondary school friend of mine. She was born at roughly the same time as me (well, I was fourteen weeks early, her a month), and she weighed even less than me, and has/had worse eyesight (well, I was born blind and she could see, but hers became worse than mine from a very young age) and she made it through as well, she did those things as well. Babies are strong. “
While it is good that your friend also made it through, unfortunately not all babies are strong
Eg, www.news.com.au/lifestyle/heal…
There are positive outcomes, there are negative outcomes, and each case is individual.
“There would still be ways to live. Everyone deserves a life unless they ruin the life of another. If you have that attitude, what does that say for deafblind children, or children/adults who cannot look after themselves at all (due to a mental condition or underdevelopment). And even when it comes to criminals, I still think they deserve the right to books and art (my government recently tried to ban both). It sounds cheesy, these stories, I know, but real life can be like that sometimes.”
If I were talking about being simply blind alone, or deaf alone, it wouldn’t be so much of an issue. But blind as well as deaf? As well as being unable to walk? How much disability can an individual put up with? What if the kid was going to get cancer and would have a short life with nothing but pain?
“Well, then that would be her fault, and if that were the situation, I would hope I was given a better home. Yes, abuse is disgusting no matter what, but many people have risen above such a thing.
Again, they chose to have sex. The intelligent and most responsible thing would be to do that, but I know not everyone can resist lust. She is just selfish if she tries to get rid of it if or when it happens.”
It is far less selfish to stop something born before it can even feel pain than to bring a life into the world where it will know nothing but. She shouldn’t have gotten pregnant yes, but sometimes abortion is a kinder alternative.
“Of course I do. And while I know I cannot help them all, if I can at least give one, or two (I would still feel horrible about the children I’ve left behind) a good, loving home, I will had made some difference, even if it is so insignificant and will make no difference over all. It is because people are too selfish to adopt. Yes, you are free to have children the biological way, but I just wish people would consider adopting more. And besides, what’s to stop someone having a child biologically and from adoption. They are just as much your children. Your real parents are those who raise you. ‘Adopted’ should not be a prefix. I’m saying this because I’ve noticed they always separate children in those categories when naming them.”
This is true.
“Miscarriage is not on purpose, as you just stated. You cannot choose to miscarry. It is a tragic part of nature.”
Point being just because something is natural does not always make it so great. Caesareans are sometimes done to save the life of a baby. Are they natural?
“Urgh. They are not ‘being an ass’. Sure, they are letting themselves get carried away with that natural lust, but it is not evil.”
Okay, harassment is not “evil evil” but it’s still bad. A person can be sued if they do that. Besides, you don’t want someone you don’t care for deciding to try copping a feel from you, do you?
“Because the man is not penetrated, the man’s body does not change so much. That’s not to say I don’t think lesbians can’t be raped, even if they used a dildo (but you’re kind of bisexual, then).”
…..Rape however is evil.
“Most men don’t feel pain either, whereas as a woman’s body to needs adjust to something being in there (yes, I know that some woman feel no pain, or have masturbated beforehand, but then you’re a non-virgin anyway). Yes, I know that you can tighten right back up afterwards if you don’t do it again for a while, but it does not change what has happened. I’m not saying that in a sexist way. I’m just saying that sex a big step in life (for men as well) and people treat it as if it is nothing. It can signal a commitment, it can result in the creation of new life, it can make you feel like a different person. Again, I’m not saying that applies to all, but those people who don’t feel even the slightest bit different are in denial.”
Why does this “change” matter in regards to harassment or rape?
“Again, I never said it was not. Mind you, I tend to judge the severity of a physical or mental violation by how painful it is or what kinds of affects it had on the person’s mind, so I know that does not apply to all.”
While there are different situations that should be treated differently, this can get abused.
“No, it is hypocrisy. Saying that one man can do all this stuff with you and another suddenly can’t because he’s no that man is hypocrisy because she has already done all that stuff, and it would make no difference doing it again. No, it is hypocrisy. Again, as I said, it makes the trauma no less real, but it is not for those reasons. It is her realising how foolish she was and how she cannot go back to the way things were before (no, not in regards to second partner, but her taking the step too early).”
I do not think that is what her problem would be. That is what your problem is, and yours alone because for some reason you’re placing a lot of value into being a virgin and whether a person is rushing into a sex or not, it shouldn’t matter. No-one cares except for the odd religious nut. You know why? A woman’s body is her own. It is not hypocrisy to complain about getting raped, because what she did was never wrong in the first place, because it’s her body, and her right to do with it what she wants. She could be the next Paris Hilton but it would still be her body and her right.
For some reason you really “dislike” this change from having sex or think it is really immoral. Yeah, there might be a difference afterwards, but it’s not bad thing. You think it’s so bad, life after sex, and that the way things “were before” is so much better? I think you’re afraid of change, or at least that change. And for what? What do you THINK would happen if, for some odd reason, you did have consensual sex? I know you’re asexual, but say someone slipped you an aphrodisiac. You had an operation on your brain, whatever, just flex your imagination a bit. Humour me. You did it, the next morning, you go to the doctor, and you caught nothing after some tests. You didn’t become pregnant. What then? What different sort of person would you become?
“She still deserves all the comfort and help she needs. “
Yes she does.
“Again, as she made a commitment to someone, as well as violating her, that person is violating her commitment to that person, and if that person were to reject her afterwards, she or he would be almost as bad as the rapist. I say the same for those sick cunts who break up with someone or dump them because they were raped and therefore ‘someone got there first’. That ‘first’ was not her choice. And it was not really a first in the first place, as she did not consent.”
It would be wrong.
“Yes, I did, but that person still rushed in too fast, most likely. Some relationships just don’t work out, and that is a sad thing (I mean that truly, as all that love and connections ended up for naught because something happened). If someone wants to date a girl (or a guy) who has been with another, all the power to them, they are strong people, but it still hypocritical to claim cheating, even if it wasn’t the claimer’s fault that the relationship failed, as she already made a commitment to another. “
Cheating is bad not because it’s hypocritical, it’s bad because your partner wants you to love him or her. A person might have not had any partners before. Like you, you might not have had any partner before your BF. But if you went out and kissed someone while you agreed to be with him, you’d be cheating. If he went out and kissed a girl at the moment, he’d be cheating on you. If you however kissed someone before you even knew your BF, it wouldn’t be cheating. If you kiss your BF, you’re not cheating on your previous partner, because it would be over between you and that person. On the odd chance you have cheated on your BF, if he decided to kiss someone, he’s still be wrong, as he would be no better than you, (but you would also be in the wrong in the first place). If there is one thing that is hypocritical in this world, it is revenge.
“I haven’t had sex with him. It is still be no less sad, but I have not handled my body over to someone else (no, we don’t do the ‘I belong to you and you belong to me’ nonsense).”
That’s your prerogative.
We have charities over here for deafblind children. They can learn braille, explore the world through touch, have sensory toys. Those people can still enjoy life even if they cannot look after themselves. If they want to, on their own terms, die because it is too much for them, that is a whole different topic, but it is the decision and thoughts of the that person and that person alone who decides whether he or she likes his or her life.
Again, it is the person's choice whether their live is good or not.
I'm glad you think so.
But a C-section is not selfish, as you stated. Yes, we can all be selfish at times, but there is a level limit. For example, wishing to entertain ourselves, and asking for books, or technology, or whatever resources for it can be considered selfish. And there is always the survival instinct again, which can appear in negative ways. Yes, we thankfully have people who are dedicated to saving the life of others, but if a situation is really dire, we most likely will do anything we can to preserve ourselves.
Of course.
Again, of course.
She can just ignored it.
No, no, as I said to another person, you can be in a heterosexual, sexually-active relationship and still be feminist. Most married women are non-virigins, I know it is rare to become pregnant on the first attempt, etc. There is just a difference between 'meaningful sex' and 'throwing yourself at someone because you are letting lust control you'. I place a value on it in regards to romance and marriage because it makes sense. Again, people assume it for religious reasons. That's not the only reason, I've shown and observed. It is not fully 'her body' if she has given herself to another. Virgins have someone to lose (no, I am not saying rape is bad for the loss of virginity, but the heinous crime of someone taking and violating her body). A heterosexually non-virgin female does not have anything to violate unless she is engaged or married. She can sleep with as many or as few people she wants, but that does mean she can deny people the right to avoid her or have an opinion on her.
No, I don't think it's bad. I'm just saying there is some kind of change, no matter how small, and I (and I'm not the only one) just wishes people would be more careful and realize that it can only happen once. You can only give that gift to one person. And most people don't want it for 'religious' reasons.
Well, I would be a mother. I would not let that define me as a woman, but I know I would do my damnest to make sure they have a good life. The bit I would be terrified over would be the childbirth. I know it is natural, but I would also worry this tiny body of mine could not take it (I don't think I'm 'weak' as that is anti-feminist, as I am will fight and protect myself if needed), but that, along with the shit my mother went through with both me and my brother, doesn't exactly give me confidence, and she's of average height and no medical conditions to speak of. I would get a C-section. And I would hope Matt would be there to help. I know he would not abandon me.
Again, of course. It would be disgusting. Not to mention it just piles on to the suffering the victim already had. And not forgetting how much courage and trust it takes for someone to confess such a thing.
Well, I would not, as I respect him.
Oh, I should say, I do not think sex is the ultimate commitment, as I hope implied (but implied the former there).
No, it just because someone is 'in the past' it does not chance the fact that it happened it. That relationship failed, therefore, making what happened in it pointless. Yes, I believe former partners can be friends, but how can you be friends with someone you slept with? That is why I did not understand the whole 'friends with benefits' thing. You have been so very, very, close with that person. Yes, that second, or third (after that, you're just getting desperate), can be your 'one' (I do naively wish that our first adult relationships can be our 'ones', but life is cruel) but that person still cannot claim cheating.
I in fact dislike those people who think 'we haven't done anything yet, he/she must not love me!', and I'm guessing I'm not the only one in that regard? But that's another thing casual sex has let to.
Well, as you said, I suppose the kissing would count.
“Oh, silly me there. I meant to say that I/she was born fourteen weeks/a month early. No child could survive that early. Yes, you are right, and if those negative things happen, that is life, and we must mourn. However, even babies have the survival instinct. Ok, it seems to only manifest as 'if I make enough noise, someone will help me', but a sick infant will still want to survive. Ah, I saw a documentary about those twins. At least the parents gave them the chance. There is always exceptions.
We have charities over here for deafblind children. They can learn braille, explore the world through touch, have sensory toys. Those people can still enjoy life even if they cannot look after themselves. If they want to, on their own terms, die because it is too much for them, that is a whole different topic, but it is the decision and thoughts of the that person and that person alone who decides whether he or she likes her life.
Again, it is the person's choice whether their live is good or not”
Yes, it is that person’s decision. Although in cases where someone severely ill and is also incompetent, and there is not much hope for the person recovering, and their decision to continue living or continue suffering is unknown, the decision to end a life is left up to the family. In the case of an unborn child, it is best left up to the mother, which would be the said family.
“But a C-section is not selfish, as you stated. Yes, we can all be selfish at times, but there is a level limit. For example, wishing to entertain ourselves, and asking for books, or technology, or whatever resources for it can be considered selfish. And there is always the survival instinct again, which can appear in negative ways. Yes, we thankfully have people who are dedicated to saving the life of others, but if a situation is really dire, we most likely will do anything we can to preserve ourselves.”
Yet you believe abortion is selfish. Yet it isn’t selfish if you want to stop or prevent someone suffering.
Murder is wrong and selfish. Ending a life in the case of euthanasia or self-defence, is not.
“She can just ignored it.”
And if someone off the street decided to try feeling your boobs, are you going to ignore it and let him continue?
“No, no, as I said to another person, you can be in a heterosexual, sexually-active relationship and still be feminist. Most married women are non-virigins, I know it is rare to become pregnant on the first attempt, etc. There is just a difference between 'meaningful sex' and 'throwing yourself at someone because you are letting lust control you'.”
There is also a lot of grey area in between.
“I place a value on it in regards to romance and marriage because it makes sense. Again, people assume it for religious reasons. That's not the only reason, I've shown and observed. It is not fully 'her body' if she has given herself to another. Virgins have someone to lose (no, I am not saying rape is bad for the loss of virginity, but the heinous crime of someone taking and violating her body). A heterosexually non-virgin female does not have anything to violate unless she is engaged or married. She can sleep with as many or as few people she wants, but that does mean she can deny people the right to avoid her or have an opinion on her.”
She does have something she has lost, same as a virgin, as you described above “the heinous crime of someone taking and violating her body” but why do you think this doesn’t happen to non-virgins?
Why do you think “it is not fully her body” and that “it’s given to another” so completely?
What evidence can you provide that a woman does, would or should have her rights to her own body lost, that any sort of enslavement, either physical, mental or otherwise, starts the moment she has any sort of sexual activity, whether in a commitment or outside of one?
“No, I don't think it's bad. I'm just saying there is some kind of change, no matter how small, and I (and I'm not the only one) just wishes people would be more careful and realize that it can only happen once. You can only give that gift to one person. And most people don't want it for 'religious' reasons.”
Yes, but to believe the change is so severe that it’s hypocrisy when a non-virgin complains about rape?
“Well, I would be a mother. I would not let that define me as a woman, but I know I would do my damnest to make sure they have a good life. The bit I would be terrified over would be the childbirth. I know it unnatural, but I would also worry this tiny body of mine could not take it (I don't think I'm 'weak' as that is anti-feminist, as I am will fight and protect myself if needed), but that, along with the shit my mother went through with both me and my brother, doesn't exactly give me confidence, and she's of average height and no medical conditions to speak of. I would get a C-section. And I would hope Matt would be there to help. I know he would not abandon me.”
Yes, but what if you HAD sex, but DIDN’T become pregnant? Next day, go to doctor, no STD’s, no pregnancy. What would happen to you, do you think?
“Again, of course. It would be disgusting. Not to mention it just piles on to the suffering the victim already had. And not forgetting how much courage and trust it takes for someone to confess such a thing.”
Indeed
“Oh, I should say, I do not think sex is the ultimate commitment, as I hope implied (but implied the former there).
No, it just because someone is 'in the past' it does not chance the fact that it happened it. That relationship failed, therefore, making what happened in it pointless.”
I’m not saying former relationships end up being pointless or that it never happened. I’m saying what a person does in previous relationships doesn’t have any bearing on future ones in regards to cheating.
“Yes, I believe former partners can be friends, but how can you be friends with someone you slept with? That is why I did not understand the whole 'friends with benefits' thing. You have been so very, very, close with that person. Yes, that second, or third (after that, you're just getting desperate), can be your 'one' (I do naively wish that our first adult relationships can be our 'ones', but life is cruel) but that person still cannot claim cheating.”
I guess you’d have to ask someone who has slept with someone for that. It does happen though and it simply doesn’t affect other people the same it does with others.
“I in fact dislike those people who think 'we haven't done anything yet, he/she must not love me!', and I'm guessing I'm not the only one in that regard? But that's another thing casual sex has let to.”
You’re the only person I know of that considers what a person does before a relationship qualifies as cheating.
Why do you dislike them?
“Well, as you said, I suppose the kissing would count.”
Yep.
“I also forgot to mention a bit in regards to pregnancy - what if my allergies or conditions were to be passed down as well? I know they say it's fifty percent, but it's still fifty percent. If my child had those conditions, it would be all my fault. Yes, that child might be able to live life normally despite them, but I would still feel guilty that they had them.”
I dread the thought of having a child myself. It’s times like that I consider getting my tubes tied. But I’m forever alone anyway so why worry? But I asked you to stretch your imagination, so I’ll stretch mine in return.
If I had a child that had the same problems that I or my family has, or I passed on some disability, I’d have to live with that guilt. It would eat away it me, I guess, but there will be ways in life to deal with that guilt. In guess one way would be to channel it into helping the child cope with whatever problem it gets. If the guilt got too severe, I would have to seek help as I would not only have to look after my own well-being but the well-being of the kid who would depend on me, and I would have to realise this.
I don’t know if that would apply to you
No. That child has yet to even begins its life. It deserves a chance, not to be murdered by some heartless cow. The father, if willing, can take the child, or again, it can be given to another family. Just as the mother can keep the child if the father is a heartless bastard.
But again, you don’t know if that person will suffer. And that person who wants to end that life again was a foetus once. Euthanasia is the choice of the person wishing it unless they cannot give consent, then indeed it is the choice of the family. That foetus has yet to begin life in the real world. Again, unless the pregnancy could cause the mother’s death, or it was the result of rape, there is no reason to abort.
That is different. That is physical. Words from a stranger who knows nothing of you can be ignored.
Because she already gave herself to someone. Yes, she will suffer physically because that attacker obviously cares nothing for her, or sometimes, does not know what they are doing (it can happen, but the attacker would still be at fault), but she is not losing anything physically. Well, because sex, for women, tends to be more about emotions than physical thing (again, women who can be completely without emotions is a cold being), and due to the way sex works, she be very open and exposed to her partner, male or female. It is not slavery within commitment. Yes, I know sex is about lust, but again, it can be romantic in a committed relationship. But again, casual sex, swingers, BDSM, exist.
It’s not ‘severe’, that’s too harsh a word. Again, she already let another take he, and there being another, unless she is engaged or married, makes no difference in the long run. Her mind however, is a different matter, as we know.
Well, I’d probably just think “Well, fuck.” As then I would to give myself those names and insults. I’m good at insulting myself, after all.
Well, it does to some people, including me. Some people (not for religious reasons) think that sex outside of marriage, even with the person they are going to marry is betraying their future husband/wife (or only husband, because we all know lesbians are just trying to get attention -_-) or not being the strength and respect to wait until they are wed. I’m not that extreme, especially in regards to the ‘with the same person part’ and the fiancé/fiance is just as guilty for that last part as well. Some people just don’t like someone having a ‘sexual past’ to thin about. And no, it’s not because they ‘worry they might not be good enough’, unlike most ‘feminists’ say (I’m not saying you think this, I’m just giving an example of such attitudes again).
But other people are free to view such things however they like. To have our own opinions, no matter what, is a form of equality.
Again, I don’t dislike them. I don’t like the attitude and selfishness.
:Nod:
Forever alone? Now, now, why would you say that? As sappy, pathetic, and naïve as this sounds, you will find someone. Yes, I dread to think that there are people who have existed that, no matter how much they tried, never found that speical someone, but no-one deserves to die alone. No-one. For some reason, I can even extend that to the lowest and sickest of criminals. Seeing their loved ones, if they have any, might just make them think before they lose cognitive thinking, die and go to hell. That’s a sick thing right? To think that they deserve someone so…kind.
Eh, um, sorry
Ah, so I could use my experiences to help them? How logical (not sarcsasm). I mean sure, they could be a whiney little, “But you’re not me! You don’t understaaaannnddd!” but I would do my best to dispel that attitude. But of course. I would never want to be in a situation where I could not look after them. Also, as…old fashioned, maybe a little anti-feminist as this sounds, if I could raise a child, adopted or biological, I will made another achievement – I would add to the people who prove that disabilities does not mean one cannot be a good parent.
But that’s a long, long time away, after lots of training and confidence building.
“For the first one, yes. However, just out of curiosity, what is your opinion in regards to comas? Or permanent comas? It is true in some cases that the person can hear.”
Depends if there’s a chance of recovering. If there is, then all the best for the person in the coma. If not, in the permanent case, what’s the point in keeping that person “alive”? The person is gone, all that’s left is a heart beating and a body working which is not really what defines as “life life” to me, not without the mind and/or soul.
“No. That child has yet to even begins its life. It deserves a chance, not to be murdered by some heartless cow. The father, if willing, can take the child, or again, it can be given to another family. Just as the mother can keep the child if the father is a heartless bastard.
But again, you don’t know if that person will suffer. And that person who wants to end that life again was a foetus once. Euthanasia is the choice of the person wishing it unless they cannot give consent, then indeed it is the choice of the family. That foetus has yet to begin life in the real world. Again, unless the pregnancy could cause the mother’s death, or it was the result of rape, there is no reason to abort.”
While I disagree, as I would include cases of severe illnesses, or would still find it worse to simply bring a life into the world and abandon it (few people are adopting at all) and/or worse (there are horrible parents out there), what am I going to do? I value quality of life, you value life. I will -try- for once not to go forcing my views down someone’s throat. Maybe agree to disagree.
“That is different. That is physical. Words from a stranger who knows nothing of you can be ignored.”
True to an extent. Have you practised this though?
“Because she already gave herself to someone. Yes, she will suffer physically because that attacker obviously cares nothing for her, or sometimes, does not know what they are doing (it can happen, but the attacker would still be at fault), but she is not losing anything physically. Well, because sex, for women, tends to be more about emotions than physical thing (again, women who can be completely without emotions is a cold being), and due to the way sex works, she be very open and exposed to her partner, male or female. It is not slavery within commitment. Yes, I know sex is about lust, but again, it can be romantic in a committed relationship. But again, casual sex, swingers, BDSM, exist.”
If you are referring to consent, if this is your evidence, consent is not “giving herself to someone”. No more than asking someone to scratch your back so you can get rid of an itch means you are giving yourself to that person (or scratching someone else’s back). There may be love involved, there may be not, but either way, she or he still owns themselves.
If you are referring to love, well again, this doesn’t necessarily involve sex, and a person is still owned by themselves. Having a BF you should know this.
Being open or exposed isn’t giving away a person’s body. Whether you mean getting naked (my doctor has already seen me heaps of times. He don’t own me) or opening yourself emotionally which doesn’t always occur sexually anyway (I’m open to my family and friends they don’t own me either).
No-one, short of a satanic ritual, gives themselves to anybody in this permanent basis you seem to think of.
“It’s not ‘severe’, that’s too harsh a word. Again, she already let another take he, and there being another, unless she is engaged or married, makes no difference in the long run. Her mind however, is a different matter, as we know.”
Not severe? “makes no difference?” Do even realise the gravity of what you say? Why so many people have been upset at you?
“Well, I’d probably just think “Well, fuck.” As then I would to give myself those names and insults. I’m good at insulting myself, after all.”
What insults? “weak”, “submissive”, “whore”… When in fact you’d just end up being like the rest of the human race who has sex for pleasure. Well I’m sorry if anyone doing it means becoming something you dislike but face it people are human.
“Well, it does to some people, including me. Some people (not for religious reasons) think that sex outside of marriage, even with the person they are going to marry is betraying their future husband/wife”
But the people who have sex are usually either in the belief they ARE having sex with the future spouse or don’t even have any plan to have a commitment ever.
“ (or only husband, because we all know lesbians are just trying to get attention -_-)”
Are you a supporter of LGBT or are you not?
“ or not being the strength and respect to wait until they are wed. I’m not that extreme, especially in regards to the ‘with the same person part’ and the fiancé/fiance is just as guilty for that last part as well. Some people just don’t like someone having a ‘sexual past’ to thin about. And no, it’s not because they ‘worry they might not be good enough’, unlike most ‘feminists’ say (I’m not saying you think this, I’m just giving an example of such attitudes again).”
Yeah people should wait. But once again, people are human.
“But other people are free to view such things however they like. To have our own opinions, no matter what, is a form of equality.”
We have our right to free speech, but we also have our right to live in a non-threatening environment.
“Forever alone? Now, now, why would you say that? As sappy, pathetic, and naïve as this sounds, you will find someone. Yes, I dread to think that there are people who have existed that, no matter how much they tried, never found that speical someone, but no-one deserves to die alone. No-one. For some reason, I can even extend that to the lowest and sickest of criminals. Seeing their loved ones, if they have any, might just make them think before they lose cognitive thinking, die and go to hell. That’s a sick thing right? To think that they deserve someone so…kind.
As touching as this is, I have to face facts; I dug my own grave here. This is what I get for spending my youth running around getting into people’s faces about how evil I thought sex was and how holier I was than everyone else. I was a little bigot and now I’m paying the price. Besides the one time I did have a BF I had to break up with him because I couldn’t put out and he wanted me to; he ended up taking it out on others by going out getting drunk and getting into fights, which scared me, but I realised I was being cruel; what was I going to do, continue on and marry him and on the wedding night refuse to do anything? Keep him in effect celibate for the rest of his life?
Anyway, I disgress. I am the one who has isolated myself. VERY much like you have begun to do so to yourself. That is why I am here. Change before you end up like me. This is not a threat, this is a warning.
“Eh, um, sorry
. I just get a little carried away when people have this opinion of themselves, given that I’m a pessimist. We don’t need more of our kind. People of that mind set are an expatriating lot.”
Okay
“Ah, so I could use my experiences to help them? How logical (not sarcsasm). I mean sure, they could be a whiney little, “But you’re not me! You don’t understaaaannnddd!” but I would do my best to dispel that attitude. But of course. I would never want to be in a situation where I could not look after them. Also, as…old fashioned, maybe a little anti-feminist as this sounds, if I could raise a child, adopted or biological, I will made another achievement – I would add to the people who prove that disabilities does not mean one cannot be a good parent.
But that’s a long, long time away, after lots of training and confidence building.”
People should not discriminate those with disabilities as they have a right to be a parent as much as anyone, so long as they are a good parent and cause no harm.
Neither can them.
Exactly. They were once that vulnerable, tiny life. They are basically saying that it is ok for them to be born, but if they were to chose to have and have the natural result of pregnancy, it is utterly and completely selfish for her to act like, “Oh, but I’m special, that baby will only be an inconvenience.” If their parents had not ‘allowed’ her to be born, she would not have been alive to be so selfish. Rape, incest and the mother’s life being in danger are the only viable, non-sexist, non-hypocritical, non-selfish reasons for an abortion.
Of course, I value quality of life. That is why I believe in that child deciding if their lives are good or not. Most children can tell if they are being abused. In addition, people don’t adopt as they do not bother to even consider it. As I said, there is nothing with wanting a child the biological way, but no one even considers adoption, even when having trouble getting pregnancy. They go through all the expensive IVF and whatnot before him for such reasons as ‘wanting the sensation of pregnancy’, a ‘child to carry on my blood’. Very well then. This is a detersive topic. I am just sick of the selfishness and ‘you are against abortion?! MISOGYNIST! ANTI-FEMINIST!” attitudes.
I do my best, but we all have a point where we can take no more. Yes, it’s hypocritical, but we are all hypocrites. If some person were to proposition me, or yell out someone sexual, I would just say something such as, “I’m a virgin and happy about it, thank you very much” and walk on.
Sex is unlike any act in the world. It can be compared to nothing.
I was not saying that sex equals love. I just believe that is an intimate thing that should be between two people engaged/married people (are they are now lawfully committed rather than just officially in their eyes) who love each other and them alone.
No, but the nakedness and design of sex means, weather she thinks so or not, a woman is very exposed and under the guidance of a man. I do not think there does not exist men who are just as nervous in that area, or that all girls are shy and terrified when it comes to sex, but the man is not the one allowing someone of the opposite gender inside their body, to have complete access to their body (yes, men allow that too, but it is not as much a woman does).
I simply understand what being two-faced and pompous is, thinking one is better than this person is even though they have already thrown themselves at another. Acting as if they have someone to preserve, something to keep, something to protect.
I have my body to protect and honour. I look after it; I will never it up give it to anyone.
Yes, but if I did not, I would be acting as if it is difference simply because I am me. That would be an incredibly arrogant thing to do.
Unless they are engaged or married, they obviously went in too soon.
Even if they don’t plan to have a commitment even though they are having se as a woman, again, they are rather heartless. Yes, not everyone wants to fall in love or get married, but if so, don’t go doing the very thing that is supposed to be a private thing between two committed people.
I am for them, of course. I’m not some intolerant cunt. I was simply showing the type of attitudes homophobes display. It is sometimes hard to convey vocal tones in writing, so I hoped the emote would show that. Sorry for the confusion.
True, true. Some just have more willpower than others do.
Yes, but that’s never going to happen. We can reduce it was much as possible, but as there will always exist someone to brainwash the next generation, who will then past it onto those after them, that will never be.
You were expressing your opinion and there is nothing wrong with that. If people want to choose to be offended at someone’s opinion on their choice, that is their problem, not yours. However, I do not think sex is ‘evil’. Virgins are better when so many girls are throwing that gift away at such a young age and outside lawful, complete commitment. If most girls were preserving themselves and being intelligent enough to know when it is good to do that, then it would not be so special.
Well, then, he was a prick. It’s not as if you were the first to be put in that position. You might one day find someone else with similar views. You sound young (not young young, but twenty-something) so it’s not as if you are running out of time.
However, even if I did not have a boyfriend, I would not care, as I don’t need to be in a relationship to be happy. Other people would just assume that it is because of my views and that would be their brainwashed opinion. He does not really care for sex. He loves me because I am strong, self-respecting, booze and drug free woman. Of course, we have a lot in common as well. Some of our opposites even compliment (hence why opposites attract sometimes). Yes, like most couples, we do argue every now and then or get annoyed at sometimes (he gets annoyed at my paranoia at other people’s opinions and I hate how messy he is, for example), but we know we will always get along.
Well, just like with other intolerances, it will always happen.
“I do my best, but we all have a point where we can take no more. Yes, it’s hypocritical, but we are all hypocrites. If some person were to proposition me, or yell out someone sexual, I would just say something such as, “I’m a virgin and happy about it, thank you very much” and walk on.”
Depends on the person, everybody is different in regards to how much they can take.
“Sex is unlike any act in the world. It can be compared to nothing.
I was not saying that sex equals love. I just believe that is an intimate thing that should be between two people engaged/married people (are they are now lawfully committed rather than just officially in their eyes) who love each other and them alone.”
Not everyone has this belief though. Not that they believe people who are married shouldn’t love/ have sex, just that it doesn’t necessarily have to be strictly within that marriage. Heck, there are some people who don’t even believe in marriage. Of course you have your beliefs if that’s what you want to do (save for marriage etc) that’s all good. But when someone else does different to what you do, who are you to condemn them?
“No, but the nakedness and design of sex means, weather she thinks so or not, a woman is very exposed and under the guidance of a man. I do not think there does not exist men who are just as nervous in that area, or that all girls are shy and terrified when it comes to sex, but the man is not the one allowing someone of the opposite gender inside their body, to have complete access to their body (yes, men allow that too, but it is not as much a woman does).”
Why not as much as a woman does? Why would that give her less rights over her body as a man? Why are men allowed to do whatever while women have to be all pure and proper, just because of this? Why should women who choose to have sex in spite of this be condemned to abuse?
“I simply understand what being two-faced and pompous is, thinking one is better than this person”
And you don’t think you’re better than non-virgins because you are a virgin? Weren’t you going around calling non-virgins a string of insults? You weren’t thinking you were better because you’re not “weak” “slutty” “brainwashed” etc….
“ is even though they have already thrown themselves at another.”
This doesn’t mean they should have to put up with rape. They don’t even do it to be pompous or because they think they are better or whatever. They have sex because they like someone.
“Acting as if they have someone to preserve, something to keep, something to protect.”
There are things to protect beyond virginity. As much as it is your right to keep to yourself, but with the way you put a fuss over those that don’t, why do you feel a woman has to protect virginity so much, why do you think that’s ALL a woman needs to protect and be upset over? Why do you feel you have to? A lot of people don’t care about virginity, why should you? Maybe this thing YOU feel the need to preserve and protect isn’t as valuable as you think it is.
“I have my body to protect and honour. I look after it; I will never it up give it to anyone.”
No-one’s going to steal your body. Sans body-snatchers, if they exist. Or demons. (don't demons actually PREFER harassing virgins?)
“Yes, but if I did not, I would be acting as if it is difference simply because I am me. That would be an incredibly arrogant thing to do.”
Well yeah that is true. But the point was, why give out those insults to anyone at all, even yourself? It’s like a homophobic person who is also gay throwing out
insults to himself and others as well. But the question is why does he want to insult people who are homosexual? Why do you feel the need to insult non-virgins?
Anyway you answered my question of what you think would happen to you after sex. You pointed out you would insult yourself. Is this what you feel the need to protect and honour? How you would not feel weak or slutty? Is this why you value virginity so much, just so you’re not these things?
“Unless they are engaged or married, they obviously went in too soon.”
It’s up to the parties involved to decide what is right for themselves.
“Even if they don’t plan to have a commitment even though they are having se as a woman, again, they are rather heartless. Yes, not everyone wants to fall in love or get married, but if so, don’t go doing the very thing that is supposed to be a private thing between two committed people.”
Why are they heartless for doing what is by most regarded an act of affection, whether in a commitment or not? Why should they not have sex just because they don’t want to get married? It’s their bodies after all.
“I am for them, of course. I’m not some intolerant cunt. I was simply showing the type of attitudes homophobes display. It is sometimes hard to convey vocal tones in writing, so I hoped the emote would show that. Sorry for the confusion.”
Uhhh, okay.
“True, true. Some just have more willpower than others do.”
Or simply less libido, and had less of a challenge than others.
“Yes, but that’s never going to happen. We can reduce it was much as possible, but as there will always exist someone to brainwash the next generation, who will then past it onto those after them, that will never be. “
Who’s brainwashing who?
“You were expressing your opinion and there is nothing wrong with that. If people want to choose to be offended at someone’s opinion on their choice, that is their problem, not yours. However, I do not think sex is ‘evil’. Virgins are better when so many girls are throwing that gift away at such a young age and outside lawful, complete commitment. If most girls were preserving themselves and being intelligent enough to know when it is good to do that, then it would not be so special.”
It was not a matter of expressing an opinion it was shoving my opinion down everybody’s throats, which isn’t a very nice thing to do. Nasty habit of mine, I need to break it. No-one cares if someone’s a virgin or not, just don’t go telling people what they should or shouldn’t do with their bodies. It’s wrong.
“However, even if I did not have a boyfriend, I would not care, as I don’t need to be in a relationship to be happy. Other people would just assume that it is because of my views and that would be their brainwashed opinion. He does not really care for sex. He loves me because I am strong, self-respecting, booze and drug free woman. Of course, we have a lot in common as well. Some of our opposites even compliment (hence why opposites attract sometimes). Yes, like most couples, we do argue every now and then or get annoyed at sometimes (he gets annoyed at my paranoia at other people’s opinions and I hate how messy he is, for example), but we know we will always get along."
I don’t think people would assume that simply because of your “unique” views. A lot of people feel they don’t need to be in a relationship to be happy. Not everyone out there is some brainwashed force
“Well, just like with other intolerances, it will always happen.”
People should try to try and stop it though I guess
Indeed, but some people just oversensitive or lack a spine.
You can love without marriage. The marriage would even happen if there was no love, obviously. I’ not ‘waiting’ for marriage. That implies I’m going to jump my spouse the moment the reception is over. Even in marriage, I would not want to do that. Even a marriage can work without sex. If people don’t believe in marriage, that is their belief. It’s my opinion. People are so loose nowadays. Ok, I know not everyone, even when in a relationship, fuck like rabbits, but sex used to be such a private thing. Even in times before a brothel was seen as more respectable (for both parties).
She still has rights to her body, but must understand that she shared it with another person. I just explained why. I explained that too. The physical, biological, emotional/mental differences along with the differing results or connotations. It is not ‘abuse’. It is opinion. If she’s does not like me, maybe she should not have been so loose.
As I said, I and other virgins are better as so many girls are going around losing it so young and then (unsurprizingly) that relationship ends at some point, be it after a short or long period, or just losing it in casual sex. If most women (or men) were a little more in control or respectful of themselves, it would be nothing special as, well, it would be a common thing. That is not the case and it never has been.
‘Put up with rape’? While I do not think, it is the worst thing to happen as I said, (things such as murder, genocide, child/animal cruelty and torture are worse to me). They are, as again, it was perfectly ok for that boyfriend or one night stand to be with her, but this man, oh no, she’s much too pure and ‘could do better’ even though it would not change her in the slightest (unless she got an STD, but she made the choice) if that man was inside her as well.
I know our lives, our livelihood, our loved ones, all those good things. I wouldn't not ‘put up such a fuss’ if they did not shove their non-virginity in everyone’s faces while claiming how ‘liberated’ and demanding that no one have an opinion on her reckless actions or they are The Big Three of insults (‘sexist’, ‘misogynist’, ‘oppressive), and then they turn around and shame men for looking at them sexually, or wanting an opinion on the life of their child. No, as I said. Just like a woman, a woman, if so ‘liberated’ and ‘strong’, should protect her life, her job, her loved ones. I’m sure there are others, but they are the ones that popped into my mind. As I said, their attitudes affect and all proper feminists, by giving us a bad name. Not to mention they make people think if you are a feminist, you are out there shagging anyone you fancy. It also affects me and other feminists who actually care about men, because of the above mentioned sexism.
Ok, sarcastic or not I did laugh at that a little. A little off topic, but I’ve never understood the ‘virgin sacrifice’ thing. Why would a demon want someone who would be scared and not do any— oh, wait, that is what they want.
Because I would be one of them, and as I said, if I acted like I was a special case or different from anyone else, then as I said, that would be incredibility arrogant and egotistical.
One of the reasons, but also I, because I am glad I am not part of that common crowd. Yes, that sounds egotistical and arrogant, but I refer you to my reasoning above (sorry for the repeat, but you asked the question – I don’t mean that rudely). I’m pretty sure that, when I go to hell, rape is going to be my first punishment. Plus, I have no interest in having sex. Ever.
Very well, but there would still be a reason, and all that supposedly loving sex would be for naught.
How is it ‘affectionate’ when it is outside a relationship and purely about carnal desires? As I said, sex can be romantic in a relationship.
Challenge?
Intolerant adults, who were most likely got their racism, or sexism, or homophobia, or fundamentalism from another adult who insisted that in them as a child or teenager, or even as an adult, and will pass it on to the following generation.
I’m not doing that though. It’s not as if I am starting it on something unrelated. IF someone expresses their opinion in a public place or on the internet, especially when it full of double standards, sexism (against both genders) hypocrisy, or selfishness, some people will express a negative opinion. I can’t help if so many women are so insecure and don’t want to take responsibility and be treated the same as men in a world of supposed equality.
Some people do, as I told other people. I’ve seen it myself. And they have good (non-religious, non-sexist, but self-respecting reason). Again, I’m doing that either, I’m just saying they think, and while others are of course allowed an opinon on it, it is somewhat meaningless when they rely on assumptions of ‘I was raped/molested/dumped’ a ‘religious nut’, ‘insane’, ‘repressed’ and what have you.
Again, I said that, but that doesn’t mean it is ok for them to go around throwing themselves at anyone. That is disgusting.
We can only try.
“Indeed, but some people just oversensitive or lack a spine.”
Some people are. But it all depends on different people. Even you yourself would have your limits.
“You can love without marriage. The marriage would even happen if there was no love, obviously. I’ not ‘waiting’ for marriage. That implies I’m going to jump my spouse the moment the reception is over. Even in marriage, I would not want to do that. Even a marriage can work without sex. If people don’t believe in marriage, that is their belief. It’s my opinion. People are so loose nowadays. Ok, I know not everyone, even when in a relationship, fuck like rabbits, but sex used to be such a private thing. Even in times before a brothel was seen as more respectable (for both parties).”
Yes people are. And why not? There is becoming less and less reason for restraint aside from either STD’s and/ or pregnancy (solved via contraceptives etc) or religious reasons (not your issue but usually others). It feels good so why not?
“She still has rights to her body, but must understand that she shared it with another person. I just explained why. I explained that too. The physical, biological, emotional/mental differences along with the differing results or connotations. It is not ‘abuse’. It is opinion. If she’s does not like me, maybe she should not have been so loose.”
So she’s different so she should be treated different? And you see nothing at all wrong with that mindset? It is a lot like how racist or sexist or homophobic people think, after all.
You explained how you felt about sex and how you would feel vulnerable and exposed. Maybe some girls feel that way, but it isn’t universal, and it’s NOT a good reason for women to be treated different.
Like, what if your mindset was reversed? Eg. Never mind that guys take a risk when having sex. Ever heard of coitus captivus? Ever noticed how protective men are when it comes to their balls? It’s a lot safer to have your organs on the inside rather than the outside (which is why your brain is inside a skull). I guess they are more vulnerable when it comes to sex. Maybe I should start believing I can go around having sex and THEY should stay pure and proper. Maybe MEN can’t be the ones who can claim cheating while it’s okay for woman to screw whoever they want. Maybe it’s the men who are worse off for allowing a woman access to their bodies. Think the above is a load of nonsense? So do I, because it shouldn’t matter who’s vulnerable or exposed or who’s penetrated or not or whatever, any more than it shouldn’t matter whether a person is black or white. Men and woman should be treated equally.
Like, you’re a female, do you wanted to be treated different? Wouldn’t you prefer it if you were allowed to do the same things guys can do?
“As I said, I and other virgins are better as so many girls are going around losing it so young and then (unsurprizingly) that relationship ends at some point, be it after a short or long period, or just losing it in casual sex. If most women (or men) were a little more in control or respectful of themselves, it would be nothing special as, well, it would be a common thing. That is not the case and it never has been.”
You think you’re better than others, don’t you think this is a bit pompous?
“‘Put up with rape’? While I do not think, it is the worst thing to happen as I said, (things such as murder, genocide, child/animal cruelty and torture are worse to me). They are, as again, it was perfectly ok for that boyfriend or one night stand to be with her, but this man, oh no, she’s much too pure and ‘could do better’ even though it would not change her in the slightest (unless she got an STD, but she made the choice) if that man was inside her as well.”
You seriously don’t get why a girl would say no to one guy after she yes to another, even though others have tried to explain to you why? Then again, I suppose it’s like explaining the sense of taste to someone who was born without a tongue. Who can only consider why someone would refuse to eat something is because of how they would look.
“I know our lives, our livelihood, our loved ones, all those good things. I wouldn't not ‘put up such a fuss’ if they did not shove their non-virginity in everyone’s faces while claiming how ‘liberated’ and demanding that no one have an opinion on her reckless actions or they are The Big Three of insults (‘sexist’, ‘misogynist’, ‘oppressive), and then they turn around and shame men for looking at them sexually, or wanting an opinion on the life of their child. No, as I said. Just like a woman, a woman, if so ‘liberated’ and ‘strong’, should protect her life, her job, her loved ones. I’m sure there are others, but they are the ones that popped into my mind. As I said, their attitudes affect and all proper feminists, by giving us a bad name. Not to mention they make people think if you are a feminist, you are out there shagging anyone you fancy. It also affects me and other feminists who actually care about men, because of the above mentioned sexism.”
Yet you’re going to other people’s discussions and waving your virginity in their faces. How are you any better?
“Ok, sarcastic or not I did laugh at that a little. A little off topic, but I’ve never understood the ‘virgin sacrifice’ thing. Why would a demon want someone who would be scared and not do any— oh, wait, that is what they want.”
Ha ha.
“Because I would be one of them, and as I said, if I acted like I was a special case or different from anyone else, then as I said, that would be incredibility arrogant and egotistical.”
Ah, you don’t want to be “one of them”, I see. Although I do not see why you don’t see anything wrong with that line of thinking.
“One of the reasons, but also I, because I am glad I am not part of that common crowd. Yes, that sounds egotistical and arrogant, but I refer you to my reasoning above (sorry for the repeat, but you asked the question – I don’t mean that rudely).”
But if you recognise it is arrogant, why still be like that? I can see why being a “sheep” appears bad but at the same time, “when in Rome, you do as the Romans do”, and considering this society, you’re more likely to get by by tolerating people whether or not they are virgin.
“I’m pretty sure that, when I go to hell, rape is going to be my first punishment.”
Naaah. Might want to watch out what you get reincarnated as though. If you believe in that.
“Plus, I have no interest in having sex. Ever.”
That’s what I used to say before I found out I was anaemic and had that cured.
EDIT aka it might for all you know be due to a medical condition
You know what they say; pride comes before a fall.
“Very well, but there would still be a reason, and all that supposedly loving sex would be for naught.”
Sometimes.
“How is it ‘affectionate’ when it is outside a relationship and purely about carnal desires? As I said, sex can be romantic in a relationship.”
It is unlikely for a person to have sex with someone without feeling some degree of attachment or attraction to said person. They’re not going to have sex with someone they consider unlikeable or would hate (sans rapists, but they’re horrible anyway and shouldn’t be considered normal). Even the one night standers are going to pick someone they consider attractive (which doesn’t necessarily mean in a physical sense).
“Challenge?”
Yeah, challenge. Like, ages ago, I used to wonder why teenage girls would go and get pregnant etc and why they needed contraceptives. Why couldn’t they just keep their legs closed, like me? I used to think I must be a stronger person than them. Then I found out I was anaemic, and thus had a lower libido than them. What these girls had gone through was stronger than what I ever felt, and I had no right to judge them, and would do no better than they would if I were in their position.
Now, if you were mentioning people with willpower as a reference to yourself, because you have said no to sex so far, I would disagree; you are asexual, and haven’t felt desire. As you said, you have no interest in having sex, so what is your willpower resisting against? It’s like a person waving around a feather and saying “I am strong, I have lifted this little feather” when a better way to prove you a strong would be to lift a heavy weight dumb-bell. Likewise, people with little to no libido are no stronger or have more willpower than the next person. Want to prove you are strong? Be heterosexual (or homosexual/ bisexual or whatever), take a bunch of aphrodisiacs, watch a tonne of porn or whatever gets you interested, all the while not doing anything with yourself or anyone else.
“Intolerant adults, who were most likely got their racism, or sexism, or homophobia, or fundamentalism from another adult who insisted that in them as a child or teenager, or even as an adult, and will pass it on to the following generation.”
You are referring to hate, or bigotry. Come to think of it, how do those kinds of people think? “These people are different and should be treated differently” “I don’t want to be one of them” “I am better than them”…. Sound familiar?
“I’m not doing that though. It’s not as if I am starting it on something unrelated. IF someone expresses their opinion in a public place or on the internet, especially when it full of double standards, sexism (against both genders) hypocrisy, or selfishness, some people will express a negative opinion. I can’t help if so many women are so insecure and don’t want to take responsibility and be treated the same as men in a world of supposed equality.”
Doing it in a public place doesn’t make it less of a nuisance.
“Some people do, as I told other people. I’ve seen it myself. And they have good (non-religious, non-sexist, but self-respecting reason). Again, I’m doing that either, I’m just saying they think, and while others are of course allowed an opinon on it, it is somewhat meaningless when they rely on assumptions of ‘I was raped/molested/dumped’ a ‘religious nut’, ‘insane’, ‘repressed’ and what have you.”
Like I said before, no-one knows why you’re so uptight about “non-virgins” to the extent you are, so they were likely speculating as to why. Although come to think of it, if it was due to those reasons, you would have at least garnered some amount of sympathy.
“Again, I said that, but that doesn’t mean it is ok for them to go around throwing themselves at anyone. That is disgusting.”
What is disgusting, like beauty, is in the eye of the beholder.
Of course I do.
It’s just the selfishness that comes with it, as I’ve said.
Your race, orientation, and gender are not a choice. And homosexual intercourse would never result in a selfish choice made by one partner. However, a homosexual boosting about their sex life and proclaiming how ‘liberated’ they are would be just as annoying as a straight person.
I’m not saying all do, but the point is, women tend to need more trust, more of a feeling that they are safe and secure. Ok, yes, there exists plenty of women who are so weak that they can’t wait to jump someone’s bones, but you understand what I mean, yes?
No, they are valuable when it comes to damage down there (as in, someone attacking there). Biologically it doesn’t make much sense for them to be so exposed. Why did some animal species evolve to have the testis on the outside?
And actually, that used to be the case. Men (in ancient times, mind) used to be seen as insulting their virility for sleeping around, and that women were too lustful to refuse sex.
Of course, but sex is not the same for both genders. Both physically and emotionally.
If something is rare, it tends to be valued. I’m not saying I’m special little angel, but neither am I common. I am uncommon. Simple.
That’s true I guess. I just won’t understand that as I don’t have sex. And again, sex is unlike any other activity. Well, I suppose eating could count.
I can’t help if it’s all over the bloody place. If they will express their opinions, so shall others.
…I’m stupid for saying that?
I’m just me – a weirdo.
I said it sounds arrogant, but then I tried to show reasons why it is not. Several times.
I do. I understand that I am entitled to my views as much as they without being insulted for it. I feel bad about jumping to insults so easily.
Well, if so, I couldn’t care less. Plus again, that would make I would have to start calling myself those names.
Ah, I said that too. You explained it better. Ok, what we said is fairly obvious, but you still explained it far better than me.
Well, I have appointments and bloods tests on a regular basis. They haven’t found anything yet, not that I discuss such things with a doctor.
Ok, but those people who so easily give into lust do not have willpower. I can understand it that I am weak in willpower in other ways. A craving for a certain food, for example. Sometimes I can resist it as I tell myself reasons, sometimes I don’t, and I take what comes with it (unsettled stomach, can’t sleep even less because of the sugar, etc), but I know that is my fault.
Again, your gender, orientation, race and whatnot are not chosen by the person.
It’s a free place.
Well, I don’t want ‘sympathy’. Nor would I want to add to that stereotype if it was the case. I’m not some fragile little flower much as I have my paranoia. I’m strong in other areas.
Yes, yes, that’s true, but there a faction for everything.
“Of course I do.”
So why knock others?
“It’s just the selfishness that comes with it, as I’ve said.”
If people where to care what is selfish and what is not to such a large extent nobody would have any fun
“Your race, orientation, and gender are not a choice. And homosexual intercourse would never result in a selfish choice made by one partner.”
Nor would a woman who uses contraceptives/ is infertile/ uses her left hand etc.
“However, a homosexual boosting about their sex life and proclaiming how ‘liberated’ they are would be just as annoying as a straight person.”
And a virgin claiming how liberated they are isn’t annoying? Yeah, there’s a bunch of SJW on tumblr no-one likes. They get their knocks though, however AFAIK, they don’t go around saying virgins who get rape is simply karma
“I’m not saying all do, but the point is, women tend to need more trust, more of a feeling that they are safe and secure. Ok, yes, there exists plenty of women who are so weak that they can’t wait to jump someone’s bones, but you understand what I mean, yes?”
I understand the differences you are pointing out. I do not see why it’s a reason to treat someone different. Wanting to be safe and secure is one thing, but using it as a basis for not getting things males get or how women who aren’t insecure about it can’t complain about rape is another.
“No, they are valuable when it comes to damage down there (as in, someone attacking there). Biologically it doesn’t make much sense for them to be so exposed. Why did some animal species evolve to have the testis on the outside?”
Actually I think it has to do with how the sperm developed in the testes need to be kept at a temperature less than what a mammalian body is kept at. If it was kept inside the sperm would die, so it’s kept outside to cool the sperm down. Googling it….
www.google.com.au/search?safe=…
“And actually, that used to be the case. Men (in ancient times, mind) used to be seen as insulting their virility for sleeping around, and that women were too lustful to refuse sex.”
Maybe, but either way, wouldn’t that be sexist? I wouldn’t want men to not get something women get, and vice versa.
“Of course, but sex is not the same for both genders. Both physically and emotionally.”
Yeah, but you don’t want to be treated differently based on those differences, do you, I take it? So why treat others different? Do to others what you want done to you.
Like, you can argue sexes are different with sex. So are different individuals. You may feel even more vulnerable than most women. Maybe you alone should not be allowed to cheat while whatever BF/ husband/ GF whatever you get can be with whoever they want. You wouldn’t like that, would you?
“If something is rare, it tends to be valued. I’m not saying I’m special little angel, but neither am I common. I am uncommon. Simple.”
This is true, to an extent. It is my belief that things are valued based on what use you can get out of them. Take gold for example; it is useful because you can get money from it to buy things you want/ need. If you’re stuck in a desert though, a lump of gold is pretty much useless because it’s not going to turn itself magically into water or food which you really will need. If you want to be a virgin to be different it’s nice and I guess maybe you’ll value yourself. Maybe you feel you’ll be seen better in the eyes of a GF/ BF. I don’t know. Virginity however isn’t going to get you a job or money (unless you’re one of those people who sell their virginities, but considering what you’ve said so far I doubt it). It isn’t even something people are going to take notice of at first glance so it’s not like anyone else will care.
“That’s true I guess. I just won’t understand that as I don’t have sex. And again, sex is unlike any other activity. Well, I suppose eating could count.”
I just wish you could knock out the victim-blaming.
“I can’t help if it’s all over the bloody place. If they will express their opinions, so shall others.”
Like I said, they’re not saying people who get raped can’t complain etc. And considering how violent rape is, right to express your opinion can only get you so far.
“…I’m stupid for saying that?”
You need to laugh at things sometimes.
“I’m just me – a weirdo.”
Being a weirdo isn’t the problem. The “us and them” mentality is usually what leads to bigotry.
“I said it sounds arrogant, but then I tried to show reasons why it is not. Several times.”
Does that really outweigh the negative?
“I do. I understand that I am entitled to my views as much as they without being insulted for it. I feel bad about jumping to insults so easily.”
We all need to learn that at some point, as we all start off like that. I do that sometimes but I’ve hoped I have grown out of it.
“Well, if so, I couldn’t care less. Plus again, that would make I would have to start calling myself those names.”
How about not calling anyone names, either others or yourself?
You at least are consistent with your “dislike” whether it involves yourself or not.
“Ah, I said that too. You explained it better. Ok, what we said is fairly obvious, but you still explained it far better than me.”
Uhhh, thanks?
“Well, I have appointments and bloods tests on a regular basis. They haven’t found anything yet, not that I discuss such things with a doctor.”
If you say so.
“Ok, but those people who so easily give into lust do not have willpower. I can understand it that I am weak in willpower in other ways. A craving for a certain food, for example. Sometimes I can resist it as I tell myself reasons, sometimes I don’t, and I take what comes with it (unsettled stomach, can’t sleep even less because of the sugar, etc), but I know that is my fault.”
Some might be weak, yes. Some others it can’t be helped. And when it’s the latter, if nothing ill comes of it, why should it be a fault? Like when you eat that food, why feel guilty? You wanted the pleasure brought to you by that ice-cream, no-one else cares you ate it, it satisfied you, so why feel bad? It’s not a case of you being “weak” it was a case of that ice-cream being very tasty. So long as it doesn’t go so far as to cause anyone ill, which is more important than satisfying yourself.
“Again, your gender, orientation, race and whatnot are not chosen by the person.”
Food for thought; does it matter whether a person was able to choose something or not, so long as they aren’t harming anyone with it? What if the homophobes where right, homosexuality is a choice? Would homosexuality still really be wrong if it involves two consenting adults? Would it still be right for the others to continue their hate?
“It’s a free place.”
They were also free to smash my face in, which they did.
“Well, I don’t want ‘sympathy’. Nor would I want to add to that stereotype if it was the case. I’m not some fragile little flower much as I have my paranoia. I’m strong in other areas.”
If that is what you want.
“Yes, yes, that’s true, but there a faction for everything.”
I suppose.
As it’s not in the kind of way that most people do, and mine do not involve the same connotations.
Yes, that’s why there are different levels.
Well, thank you. Again, it is not ‘getting the same’ as males and females are not biologically the same. Other areas can be overcome as the reasons for the woman being disallowed from certain jobs or leadership roles were the different values and attitudes of the time, however, the divide in sexuality is based on our very, unchangeable biology. There is no innate biology (woman can be just as strong as men, either naturally or through training/building muscles) to say that woman cannot be builders, firefighters, frontline soldiers (I may hate the military, but I support that), CEOs, nor is there any to say men cannot be ballet dancers, fashion designers, househusbands, nannies and nurses. There is no way to get over the penetrator-penetrated/giver-receiver relationship in heterosexual intercourse unless you are gay.
As I said, virgins around my age are rare, not common. Again, homosexual intercourse does not come with the selfish ‘choice’ to kill the natural result while claiming it is your ‘reproductive right’, when the choice was to have sex. See my reasoning above. I’m sorry but that is something I cannot change.
A woman claiming this man’s penis is fine to be inside her, but this man, “Oh no, I’m much too pure, and ‘strong’ and ‘too good for him’” is a< hypocrite. It’s not like she already had sex or anything. It’s not like she is a sexual being or anything. It’s not like she has already been penetrated or anything.
The same goes for women who are fine with vaginal sex but anything else is disgusting. Most ridiculous is when she refuses to give a blowjob or handjob. Just…really?!
You can undo the evidence of having eaten cake, and just like most activities you are unaffected (unless you partake in it too much) afterward. When one is a non-virgin, they are so forever. Even getting one of those ridiculous ‘hymen repair surgeries’ (we both know that the hymen does not equal virginity – for me, it is partaking in any sexual activity whatsoever), that won’t undone one’s state of being.
Using contraceptives is selfish when they deny the natural result that may still happen. If it happens and they accept and are a supporter of true equality, then they may go ahead and have sex for pleasure all they like. You’re not being a hypocrite (unless they start claiming to be ‘sexually liberated’ or ‘feminist’ for letting a man dominate you). If not, that is the most disgusting, selfish, hypocritical action anyone could support or do, considering we were all foetuses once and they obviously do not support equality for all, but only when it suits women, as only women matter in this world of today. If the mother could die or, god forbid, it was from rape, that is far more understandable and not hypocritical, (but still a little bit selfish, but only a little, as it natural as well, wanting to preserve our own lives).
Ah, how stupid of me. I thought it was something to do with temperature, but I thought I was remembering it wrong, if you get what I mean. One of those ‘duuuuuuh’ moments. Though there has been a few people (men mostly, of course, though some in non-serious manners in comedy shows) have wondered why they can’t withdraw that particular area in case of attack.
That was a silly, senseless view of the past. The view after that made sense
I don’t have sex. I would not cheat anyway if that were the case. Men cannot ‘cheat’ on a woman unless he is the one she give her virginity to or married. And I would never date a non-virgin female anyway.
People care because they care about the relationships and perhaps future children as well. Ok, being a non-virgin does not automatically mean a woman will cheat, but she will compare, and most likely poison their children’s minds with the idea that sleeping around is a good thing. Not to mention she is touching those children and kissing them with lips once around another’s man genitals. It is valuable as they are highly unlikely to have any STDs as well, and regardless of how they would be passed on, it’s still there. It is valuable as it an indication (but far from the only way) of one’s strength and self-respect. For most asexuals though, it just comes naturally.
However, those girls who sell their virginity are just…there must be something wrong with them. I’m not saying that because they want to throw their virginity away from money, but rather because it indicates one had someone wrong in the mental area.
It’s not ‘victim-blaming’ that is just bullshit ‘feminists’ make up to avoid taking responsibly for their actions as the equality-seeking people they claim to be. Abuse victims and men in such cases especially, suffer victim blaming. You can’t teach people not to commit a crime they’ve never done or will continue to do, unless you are very luckily for the latter.
It’s only violence when you actually have someone to lose. As a said, a married non-virgin (provided that was the man/woman she give herself to) would not be violated, but her attacker is violating her marriage too. And if the husband/wife dumbed her for it, that would be disgusting as well. I don’t care if others hate this view or call me insane for it. I cannot change it as, unfortunately, I cannot see it any other way.
I do, but I just get worried, as I said.
Because there are two different groups of people, within the same group, as there is such exists in everything.
Others chose to see the negative. I of all people understand that (being a cynical person, after all) but still disagree.
Same here.
When they stop trying to shove their whiney, hypocritical views down everyone’s throats. But that won’t happen.
I made a genuine compliment. Sorry if it sounded sarcastic.
I’m just going on what I’ve been told and what I see myself.
Yes, but again, there are different connotations and results, again. However, eating those kinds of foods all the time can be bad as well, as it can led to health problems. However, at least that is less likely to harm others.
Again, homosexuality/homosexual intercourse (of either males or females) is far less likely to end in selfishness or someone preaching about how ‘liberated’ and ‘strong’ they are and anyone who insults them is a sexist. Hating on that would still be disgusting, as it saying that not being ‘normal’ is bad.
Well of course that would be bad. That’s violence. That’s abuse. That’s disgusting.
“Sorry this took so long, and is so short. “
No worries
“As it’s not in the kind of way that most people do, and mine do not involve the same connotations.”
Still boils down to wanting to not be harassed, doesn’t it?
“Yes, that’s why there are different levels.”
Agreed, but unless it involves harming someone, why put it in such a low level. (putting aside abortion since like I said, a lot of the time pregnancy wouldn’t be involved)
“Well, thank you. Again, it is not ‘getting the same’ as males and females are not biologically the same. Other areas can be overcome as the reasons for the woman being disallowed from certain jobs or leadership roles were the different values and attitudes of the time, however, the divide in sexuality is based on our very, unchangeable biology. There is no innate biology (woman can be just as strong as men, either naturally or through training/building muscles) to say that woman cannot be builders, firefighters, frontline soldiers (I may hate the military, but I support that), CEOs, nor is there any to say men cannot be ballet dancers, fashion designers, househusbands, nannies and nurses. There is no way to get over the penetrator-penetrated/giver-receiver relationship in heterosexual intercourse unless you are gay.”
Or unless you don’t feel insecure or vulnerable about having something inside you, at least that’s what I’m trying to see your reasons for the whole “penetrated=submissive thing”.
“As I said, virgins around my age are rare, not common. “
The internet is in fact rife with virgins, actually.
“Again, homosexual intercourse does not come with the selfish ‘choice’ to kill the natural result while claiming it is your ‘reproductive right’, when the choice was to have sex. See my reasoning above. I’m sorry but that is something I cannot change.”
But then neither does using your left hand, people who are infertile, etc.
“A woman claiming this man’s penis is fine to be inside her, but this man, “Oh no, I’m much too pure, and ‘strong’ and ‘too good for him’” is a< hypocrite. It’s not like she already had sex or anything. It’s not like she is a sexual being or anything. It’s not like she has already been penetrated or anything.”
Ummm, that's NOT what a woman complains about when she gets raped. That’s not what she thinks. Maybe that’s what YOU’D think, but others, no. it’s more likely she’d think “Oh shit this is fucking painful” or “I really hate this gross creep who did this to me, I hope he rots in hell.” and feeling a lot of disgust.
“The same goes for women who are fine with vaginal sex but anything else is disgusting. Most ridiculous is when she refuses to give a blowjob or handjob. Just…really?!”
Different folks, different strokes. I personally don’t get that either though, so long as it’s with someone you consent to do it with, I don’t see anything wrong with those. But if they don’t consent, it is a disgusting horrible act.
“You can undo the evidence of having eaten cake, and just like most activities you are unaffected (unless you partake in it too much) afterward. When one is a non-virgin, they are so forever. Even getting one of those ridiculous ‘hymen repair surgeries’ (we both know that the hymen does not equal virginity – for me, it is partaking in any sexual activity whatsoever), that won’t undone one’s state of being.”
I take it you are referring to the cake analogy someone else pointed out. Okay I’ll go with that then if you want. If one is non-virgin, it may be different or it may not (depends on the person) but if you consent at least you or no-one else is harmed. Getting raped is a form of harm. You can get scars, your internal organs might get damaged, you don’t feel secure about your safety. You can get rid of the evidence of eating the cake, but if your mouth is scarred preventing you from eating ever again, or you feel scared to eat again, you can’t undo that. Granted the first time you have sex can’t be undone either, but it’s not as traumatic.
“Using contraceptives is selfish when they deny the natural result that may still happen.”
See, I don’t get this. It stops a woman from getting pregnant, so no abortion will end up happening. Wouldn’t that make a pro-lifer such as yourself more happy? No killing, even if it is something which is currently debated by others whether it’s even alive or not.
On that note, I am curious, what is your stance on spaying animals? Yeah maybe it’s a bit insensitive putting animals when talking about people but I have been curious about this for a while.
“If it happens and they accept and are a supporter of true equality, then they may go ahead and have sex for pleasure all they like. You’re not being a hypocrite (unless they start claiming to be ‘sexually liberated’ or ‘feminist’ for letting a man dominate you). If not, that is the most disgusting, selfish, hypocritical action anyone could support or do, considering we were all foetuses once and they obviously do not support equality for all, but only when it suits women, as only women matter in this world of today. If the mother could die or, god forbid, it was from rape, that is far more understandable and not hypocritical, (but still a little bit selfish, but only a little, as it natural as well, wanting to preserve our own lives).”
The most? What about when someone on the streets who kills someone for a couple of bucks? What about some creep who rapes some poor girl (or guy) just so he can feel good about himself or herself? These are the worst sort of things you can do to someone. You seem to be focused on the killing of a foetus because of your own life experience not because of that’s what other people once were, only that because you once were a foetus that lived. Not everyone values the same things you do.
“Ah, how stupid of me. I thought it was something to do with temperature, but I thought I was remembering it wrong, if you get what I mean. One of those ‘duuuuuuh’ moments. Though there has been a few people (men mostly, of course, though some in non-serious manners in comedy shows) have wondered why they can’t withdraw that particular area in case of attack.”
That’s what life is like in the mammalian world.
“That was a silly, senseless view of the past. The view after that made sense”
It was?
“I don’t have sex. I would not cheat anyway if that were the case. Men cannot ‘cheat’ on a woman unless he is the one she give her virginity to or married. And I would never date a non-virgin female anyway.”
Good luck with that.
“People care because they care about the relationships and perhaps future children as well. Ok, being a non-virgin does not automatically mean a woman will cheat, but she will compare, and most likely poison their children’s minds with the idea that sleeping around is a good thing. Not to mention she is touching those children and kissing them with lips once around another’s man genitals. It is valuable as they are highly unlikely to have any STDs as well, and regardless of how they would be passed on, it’s still there. It is valuable as it an indication (but far from the only way) of one’s strength and self-respect. For most asexuals though, it just comes naturally.”
You know, I’m going to go out on a limb here and point out that my Mother was a non-virgin when she married. Not that it’s anyone’s business mind you. My Dad never cared, I never cared, my sisters never cared. And none of us “sleep around”… In fact I used to be the same as you almost. And heck, I don’t know exactly what she does behind closed doors with my Dad, but I do have a hunch they do do stuff that doesn’t involve getting pregnant (because that’s what married people do, have sex outside getting pregnant) and I still don’t care and I’m not afraid to hug/ kiss/ be kissed by them because I love them no matter what. I mean, your own Mother did something to conceive you (and your siblings if you have any) should you start avoiding her? To top it off, you touch your own genitalia when you wipe, maybe you should be avoided like the plague.
“However, those girls who sell their virginity are just…there must be something wrong with them. I’m not saying that because they want to throw their virginity away from money, but rather because it indicates one had someone wrong in the mental area.”
It involves money, who am I to judge? It’s their body, that’s what some people do. Maybe they’re just desperate to have a roof over their heads. Maybe you wouldn’t be so quick to judge if you weren’t so well off yourself.
“It’s not ‘victim-blaming’ that is just bullshit ‘feminists’ make up to avoid taking responsibly for their actions as the equality-seeking people they claim to be. Abuse victims and men in such cases especially, suffer victim blaming. You can’t teach people not to commit a crime they’ve never done or will continue to do, unless you are very luckily for the latter.”
I’m not talking about the cases where there are some women who falsely accuse men of rape. I’m talking about those who are raped. And that included men who are raped too. And it’s not bullshit. How would you like it if you got raped and some guy went up and told you it’s your own fault because all women are whores who want it?
“It’s only violence when you actually have someone to lose. As a said, a married non-virgin (provided that was the man/woman she give herself to) would not be violated, but her attacker is violating her marriage too. And if the husband/wife dumbed her for it, that would be disgusting as well. I don’t care if others hate this view or call me insane for it. I cannot change it as, unfortunately, I cannot see it any other way.”
Cannot, or will not? And why not? Why are you so strong on that stance, especially when it is in fact an immoral stance you are taking? This isn’t a case of some lesbian saying she won’t change her sexuality or something. This is a case of someone not seeing the immoral implications of rape. Rape for pities sake. You are looking at rape and not seeing something wrong with it. Don’t you get how VILE it is? Don’t you get how EVIL you’re being? What’s more important, your virginity or your soul?
“I do, but I just get worried, as I said.”
Worried? About what? Men not getting the same as women or vice versa? People are trying to solve that, not just you. Worried about foetuses dying? The abortion debate still rages between people who are wiser than you or I, and you think you’re smarter than any of them and have something to say that they haven’t? Pffft. Worried about women complaining about getting raped? They have a right to, and your evil for saying otherwise.
“Because there are two different groups of people, within the same group, as there is such exists in everything.”
Equality means for everyone though. Isn’t it the right sort of thing to strive for, and the right thing to avoid; bigotry?
“Others chose to see the negative. I of all people understand that (being a cynical person, after all) but still disagree.”
When you have a weakness, you don’t ignore it and focus on the strong “look how strong my right arm is!”, you look at the weak and exercise it and make it as strong as the rest of you. Same with the negative in people. Don’t ignore your own and make your better points stand out, make everything clean inside of you.
“Same here.”
Understandable
“When they stop trying to shove their whiney, hypocritical views down everyone’s throats. But that won’t happen.”
There are some groups I don’t get along with but I don’t call them names, do I?
“I made a genuine compliment. Sorry if it sounded sarcastic.”
I didn’t mean to imply that you were being sarcastic
“I’m just going on what I’ve been told and what I see myself.’
It’s your body. I am not one to tell you what is happening in it. I am going by my own experiences, it may relate to yours, it might not.
“Yes, but again, there are different connotations and results, again. However, eating those kinds of foods all the time can be bad as well, as it can led to health problems. However, at least that is less likely to harm others.”
The end result is the same between eating something nice and sex; you feel pleasure. Although sex is more pleasurable. And if you’re harming no-one, why fight it?
“Again, homosexuality/homosexual intercourse (of either males or females) is far less likely to end in selfishness or someone preaching about how ‘liberated’ and ‘strong’ they are and anyone who insults them is a sexist. Hating on that would still be disgusting, as it saying that not being ‘normal’ is bad.”
No offense meant to anyone homosexual out there, but I kind of expect that they do feel a bit liberated after they are after all were oppressed in the past. Why would that be wrong, or wrong for anyone else to preach it?
And once again, how can someone who is jilling off/ infertile/ contraceptives going to end in selfishness?
“Well of course that would be bad. That’s violence. That’s abuse. That’s disgusting.”
Getting punched is nothing. They didn’t bash me to death or anything like that. I kind of consider it society spanking my ass for misbehaving.
Yes, but I would not be a hypocrite by calling it such.
Well, for me, when it is selfishness that can be easily avoided, then it is still an issue. We all can be selfish, it’s in our genes after all. Some just choose to do it more than others.
No, it’s just when they claim to be ‘feminist’ and ‘free’ when they are willing putting themselves into a submissive position, as natural as it is. Even if thet are dominant mentally (E.g. being the one to take charge in trouble situations or being authoritative), they still have that one area. However, unlike what most people think, that does not mean I judge women entirely on virginity, or think all non-virgins are horrible. For example, biological mothers are non-virgins, most married women are non-virgins, most lesbians are non-virgins.
Yes, but they(especially if male) are insulted and shamed for that, as I’m guessing this a quip about that.
Yes, that is true. If I did not say that before, that is true.
I know, I’m just showing the way she is basically acting, regardless of her thoughts. It is not ‘gross’ as she is already a sexual being, as I said.
So you’re saying you can violate a woman’s hand or mouth, even though she already have sex with that person/is comfortable with having another man’s sexual organ inside her, which is basically touching it? Pfft. Next you’ll say you believe that bullshit that a woman being ‘tricked’ into having sex was ‘raped’ (she fell for the lie, she choose to have that sex, she consented, and a man in particular cannot ‘use’ a woman, as she choose to let him in).
Well, then, as I said to her, metaphor or not, it is simply not the same. Eating a cake (or to put in more perspective, kissing someone) is not making an irreversible choice (not even that insane ‘hymen surgery’ counts, though I’m not suprized some people think the hymen still means virginity or not, it can be broken by something as simple as your period). I’m happy to kiss my mother (you’re never too old) and my boyfriend, but that does not mean I would be happy with some random person kissing me. I’ve even hugged strangers despite the germ-related part of my OCD (I know the real name, but I can’t remember it right now) and it was only in very specific circumstances – being at a con, and said people had those ‘free hugs’ signs. Besides, who doesn’t like a nice hug?
However, the suffering is of course real, and one should be helped to get past that, but it is still hypocritical to be like that.
Yes, that is true, but the thing is, they still want to go and get an abortion, even though they know that no matter what kind of contraception it is, no matter how many different types you use, there is always that chance, that small chance, that woman will become pregnant. That is where the selfishness, the barbarism comes in.
Well, while I feel it is cruel, I read up on the reasons why, and that neutering can extend a male dog’s life, so I can understand. It seems as if we are denying them their natural desire to breed, but if it makes their lives happier, it’s a good thing. And it might reduce them humping stuff too. And if I was against it, that would be hypocritical, as I’m for human circumcision, as I respect it as part of another’s religion and because it has health benefits. However, I do feel that is anti-feminist/sexist, as I’m basically saying it’s ok to…I’m not sure if ‘mutilate’ is the right word…the body of another, as no one, unless they were sick, is for female circumcision. Then again, it comes down to the different sexual organs, I suppose.
Hm? Those are disgusting of course, but needless/selfish version of abortion are just that bit worse as that life is being taking after before they even experience the outside world and is an option. In addition, while it is still not an excuse, and should be treated as badly, but someone people have an ‘urge’, something in there that demand they kill, or someone who cannot control themselves.
If you are referring to my birth, yes, it does have an effect, as it means that I am one of those people whose mother was told (or thought herself) that I would live a miserable life and I proved them wrong. A secondary school friend weighed two ounces less than me, and has far poorer eyesight (but that is all she had in regards to medical conditions), and she is now in college. Sure, I’m not completely independent, as I said, but I know I’ll have to be one day. I’m still happy with my life at the moment. I’m still trying to contribute to society. However, my main reason is because we were once that life, and that everyone is entitled to a life unless they have committed some irredeemable crime (for me, it is murder, rape, child or animal abuse), and no one has the right to dictate who lives and who dies. Such a thing makes existence itself something punishable.
True, true. And there are some monks who can take a kick in the balls (or several) and are not even fazed: www.youtube.com/watch?v=Js_3bI… either they have an incredible amount of strength to hide their pain, or their training has affected their bodies to withstand such a thing.
Again, because of the biology.
Yes, I know, I’ll end up dying alone if ever I wanted to seek out a new partner if my current relationship goes down the plughole. I just need to hope that never happens. I know people say this a lot, but he’s the best I could have, and I would not want to be with anyone else.
As I said, some people just don’t care, and that is a noble thing. Some men nowadays care about virginity (and there is nothing ‘misogynistic’ or ‘oppressive’ about that, to comment on the typically help opinion), but others (and women, of course) who do not care are not any lesser. I just hope they comfortable kissing lips that may have been around another man’s cock, or going where other men have gone before, and that she will most likely compare him to previous partners.
As for having sex outside of getting pregnant, I mentioned that several times. The only bad thing about that is when people break up over lack of sex, calling a relationship that once had sex in it ‘sexless’ and ‘miserable’. Regardless of the reasons, it’s still a pretty shallow parting reason.
Yes, and she wanted kids, she had sex for that, and she was happy that I thought the same (again, she let me have my own views). Like most children I take after her in ways I did not even realize, as in, you have similar habits or personality traits. Also, not to mention, that was twenty years ago (my brother is a year younger).
Oh, I know my hands are clean. That’s when OCD is a good thing. Just because it’s my genitals does not make what comes out of there any less disgusting, no matter how normal it is.
It’s basically prostitution. You would never see a man doing that. Most men don’t resort to seeing their bodies when they are desperate.
Well off? I’m on benefits, and there are only two people in this house, and we don’t exactly use a lot of electricity (it’s my brother who have to five things on at once). Just because I’m disabled, or in the working class, does not mean I cannot have fun, or a life. It’s those kinds of reasons why the government have cut benefits and forced so many disabled people into jobs they can’t do, implying that actual disability is being a joyless, home-bound shell. But that’s another story.
Sure I’m not poor, but I’m not well off either. In regards to money we’re…average. And I give money to those who are actually poor, and wish I could help out in person. I’m hoping to find a project here I can help with. I applied for several overseas over two or so years as I was preparing to leave school, but I was refused on account of my disabilities (and age, because, you know, you have to be a certain age to want to help people), and the ones here are not much better.
And if the situation ever got that dire, I’d rather work in the sewers than become a prostitute, and you can imagine such thing that could affect me in the hygiene obsessive department. Or I would rather die than give my body away.
But I’m not a non-virgin, and I would have put myself in a position to be taken advantage of. Yes, it is entirely the attacker’s fault for the crime, but it is still our duty to keep ourselves aware, and not inhibit our senses and minds. One chooses to get drunk. One chooses to walk the night streets alone. One chooses to wear clothing (much as it is their choice) meant to display the body sexuality and in a public place. It is called responsibly and self-awareness. Indeed you can do all this and still end up victimized, but it far reduces your chances (after all, most rapes do happen by someone the person knows…you need to be careful with who you befriend too, such as I do). Who do you think someone is going to more likely to attack? – the sober person who is accompanied by someone else, or the drunk idiot stumbling around?
No, I am not seeing ‘rape’ at all. I know what rape is. In fact, rape used to be defined as the violation of a chaste woman. It’s good that, at least in most countries, it is gender neutral (though in the UK, the law basically stated that women could not rape until 2012), but now there is this extra crap to account for the looser morals action of modern people).
I have a soul. I’ve shown plenty of times the things I care about, the things I fight for, that I care for moral and political issues. I am not some heartless beast because of this one opinon people have a problem with. I’m not a racist, a homophobe, a fascist, anti-Semitic, anti-atheist, and so on. I support what and accept what most mornder, good people support.
Yes, but it is not ‘bigotry’ to state that there is a biological difference between men and women.
But you can’t get over all weaknesses, no matter how hard you try. Everyone has flaws. I know there are some flaws I can never get rid of, so I focus on what I do well, what I feel is and have been told is good about me. It’s better than me being miserable or angsting about how ‘useless’, or ‘worthless’ I am.
They call those people names. It’s only fair, if immature, to return the behaviour. If you were being bullied, would you say it is stupid if someone says that you fighting back, doing the same thing, is bad? I’m not some little wimp or doormat. I give back what people send out.
Oh, good.
Fair enough, it’s what I do as well, I would think.
Again, it’s the attitudes as I’ve said. People are free to whatever they want in their lives, but something that is choice can and will be judged. I am judged for my hobbies.
No, no, that is a point. Yes, one would feel liberated, but surely you get annoyed at those who are all “I’m gay and proud, bitches!”. A better attitude would to just be happy that is no longer hated by most of the world, and don’t make a big deal out of it unless there was homophobia. I only say about myself being asexual/biromantic on topics related to sex. I would expect others to be annoyed if I waltzed around the streets proclaiming it to everyone I see.
I mentioned the contraceptives. It is when a woman who claims her ‘jilling off’ (heh, I see what you did there) claims they are still a virgin, or ‘liberated’ when it is a sexual activity.
It’s still unacceptable.
“Yes, but I would not be a hypocrite by calling it such.”
And you wouldn’t complain about it happening to you?
“Well, for me, when it is selfishness that can be easily avoided, then it is still an issue. We all can be selfish, it’s in our genes after all. Some just choose to do it more than others.”
While the latter is true the former has never been an issue with me. That might just be me though.
“No, it’s just when they claim to be ‘feminist’ and ‘free’ when they are willing putting themselves into a submissive position, as natural as it is..”
What if they’re not even bothering with the feminist label?
“Even if thet are dominant mentally (E.g. being the one to take charge in trouble situations or being authoritative), they still have that one area. However, unlike what most people think, that does not mean I judge women entirely on virginity, or think all non-virgins are horrible. For example, biological mothers are non-virgins, most married women are non-virgins, most lesbians are non-virgins”
That does sound better in comparison to what you’ve said before
“Yes, but they(especially if male) are insulted and shamed for that, as I’m guessing this a quip about that.”
No, and neither men nor woman should be shamed for it. This doesn’t stop them complaining about it though despite the fact that most people know enough to not care (aka wizards). There are plenty though that don’t (seem to) give a damn if they’re a virgin though.
“Yes, that is true. If I did not say that before, that is true.”
Ah okay.
“I know, I’m just showing the way she is basically acting, regardless of her thoughts. It is not ‘gross’ as she is already a sexual being, as I said.”
Just because she became sexually active doesn’t negate her feeling of disgust when she gets raped. She would just be as disgusted as you would if some creep had his way with her.
Edit: So you see rape victims as little snots who are hypocrites for saying no? Should people see you the same way when you say no?
“So you’re saying you can violate a woman’s hand or mouth, even though she already have sex with that person/is comfortable with having another man’s sexual organ inside her, which is basically touching it? Pfft. “
Uh, actually yeah. In fact, it could be her own boyfriend/ husband who she had sex with before that who rapes her. And it’s STILL WRONG. Whether it’s vaginal or using some other body part, it’s STILL WRONG.
“Next you’ll say you believe that bullshit that a woman being ‘tricked’ into having sex was ‘raped’ (she fell for the lie, she choose to have that sex, she consented, and a man in particular cannot ‘use’ a woman, as she choose to let him in).”
It’s not bullshit. Coercion is coercion, whether by force or by deception. Same with men. Who said she chose? What if she was drugged? Coerced because if she didn’t he’d harm someone she loved, or something she valued, not necessarily her? What if she was mentally disabled and didn’t know any better? Don’t knock people claiming being tricked into it; it could happen to you if you’re not careful.
“Well, then, as I said to her, metaphor or not, it is simply not the same. Eating a cake (or to put in more perspective, kissing someone) is not making an irreversible choice (not even that insane ‘hymen surgery’ counts, though I’m not suprized some people think the hymen still means virginity or not, it can be broken by something as simple as your period). I’m happy to kiss my mother (you’re never too old) and my boyfriend, but that does not mean I would be happy with some random person kissing me. I’ve even hugged strangers despite the germ-related part of my OCD (I know the real name, but I can’t remember it right now) and it was only in very specific circumstances – being at a con, and said people had those ‘free hugs’ signs. Besides, who doesn’t like a nice hug?”
There shouldn’t be anything wrong with a hug, yeah.
But it’s not so much the reversibility that should be taken into account, but the harm it does. Rape is harmful, losing virginity under your own choice is not.
“However, the suffering is of course real, and one should be helped to get past that, but it is still hypocritical to be like that.”
It shouldn’t be.
“Yes, that is true, but the thing is, they still want to go and get an abortion, even though they know that no matter what kind of contraception it is, no matter how many different types you use, there is always that chance, that small chance, that woman will become pregnant. That is where the selfishness, the barbarism comes in.”
That’s rather harsh to judge someone on that small chance. They’re doing their best to stop the abortion happening (and also, just because someone is using contraceptives doesn’t necessarily mean they WILL get an abortion if it fails). If nothing happens, and no abortion occurs, why would it be wrong?
“Well, while I feel it is cruel, I read up on the reasons why, and that neutering can extend a male dog’s life, so I can understand. It seems as if we are denying them their natural desire to breed, but if it makes their lives happier, it’s a good thing. And it might reduce them humping stuff too. And if I was against it, that would be hypocritical, as I’m for human circumcision, as I respect it as part of another’s religion and because it has health benefits. However, I do feel that is anti-feminist/sexist, as I’m basically saying it’s ok to…I’m not sure if ‘mutilate’ is the right word…the body of another, as no one, unless they were sick, is for female circumcision. Then again, it comes down to the different sexual organs, I suppose.”
Yeah, mutilation is horrible. But the former helps the animals at least.
“Hm? Those are disgusting of course, but needless/selfish version of abortion are just that bit worse as that life is being taking after before they even experience the outside world and is an option. In addition, while it is still not an excuse, and should be treated as badly, but someone people have an ‘urge’, something in there that demand they kill, or someone who cannot control themselves.”
Those people need help though if they have the urge to kill someone, and need to be kept away from others at the very least.
“If you are referring to my birth, yes, it does have an effect, as it means that I am one of those people whose mother was told (or thought herself) that I would live a miserable life and I proved them wrong. A secondary school friend weighed two ounces less than me, and has far poorer eyesight (but that is all she had in regards to medical conditions), and she is now in college. Sure, I’m not completely independent, as I said, but I know I’ll have to be one day. I’m still happy with my life at the moment. I’m still trying to contribute to society. However, my main reason is because we were once that life, and that everyone is entitled to a life unless they have committed some irredeemable crime (for me, it is murder, rape, child or animal abuse), and no one has the right to dictate who lives and who dies. Such a thing makes existence itself something punishable.”
Yep, focused on your success story. Being a pro-lifer is irritating, but not wrong. When you can’t see someone getting raped because you’re busy being worried a non-existent baby might die, there’s the problem.
“True, true. And there are some monks who can take a kick in the balls (or several) and are not even fazed: www.youtube.com/watch?v=Js_3bI…@ either they have an incredible amount of strength to hide their pain, or their training has affected their bodies to withstand such a thing.”
That’s interesting
“Again, because of the biology.”
Oh?
“Yes, I know, I’ll end up dying alone if ever I wanted to seek out a new partner if my current relationship goes down the plughole. I just need to hope that never happens. I know people say this a lot, but he’s the best I could have, and I would not want to be with anyone else.”
Okay
“As I said, some people just don’t care, and that is a noble thing. Some men nowadays care about virginity (and there is nothing ‘misogynistic’ or ‘oppressive’ about that, to comment on the typically help opinion), but others (and women, of course) who do not care are not any lesser. I just hope they comfortable kissing lips that may have been around another man’s cock, or going where other men have gone before, and that she will most likely compare him to previous partners.”
And what if the partner doesn’t care at all?
“As for having sex outside of getting pregnant, I mentioned that several times. The only bad thing about that is when people break up over lack of sex, calling a relationship that once had sex in it ‘sexless’ and ‘miserable’. Regardless of the reasons, it’s still a pretty shallow parting reason.”
The sex lives of people are strange and complex. We’re both virgins, I for one can’t judge.
“Yes, and she wanted kids, she had sex for that, and she was happy that I thought the same (again, she let me have my own views). Like most children I take after her in ways I did not even realize, as in, you have similar habits or personality traits. Also, not to mention, that was twenty years ago (my brother is a year younger).”
Doesn’t mean she didn’t touch cock, no matter what the reason behind doing it was.
“Oh, I know my hands are clean. That’s when OCD is a good thing. Just because it’s my genitals does not make what comes out of there any less disgusting, no matter how normal it is.”
So why knock it when someone touches someone else’s genitals?
“It’s basically prostitution. You would never see a man doing that. Most men don’t resort to seeing their bodies when they are desperate. “
You’ve never heard of a male prostitute? They exist. (Okay I haven’t exactly met one, but I see them on TV).
“Well off? I’m on benefits, and there are only two people in this house, and we don’t exactly use a lot of electricity (it’s my brother who have to five things on at once). Just because I’m disabled, or in the working class, does not mean I cannot have fun, or a life. It’s those kinds of reasons why the government have cut benefits and forced so many disabled people into jobs they can’t do, implying that actual disability is being a joyless, home-bound shell. But that’s another story. Sure I’m not poor, but I’m not well off either. In regards to money we’re…average. And I give money to those who are actually poor, and wish I could help out in person. I’m hoping to find a project here I can help with. I applied for several overseas over two or so years as I was preparing to leave school, but I was refused on account of my disabilities (and age, because, you know, you have to be a certain age to want to help people), and the ones here are not much better.”
No, you’re not living in a mansion, I know that, but considering you have a roof over your head and food on your table, compared to others you’re loaded. Some people would do anything to get those things (or perhaps they’re just money hungry, who knows?)
“And if the situation ever got that dire, I’d rather work in the sewers than become a prostitute, and you can imagine such thing that could affect me in the hygiene obsessive department. Or I would rather die than give my body away.”
Not everyone is as proud as you.
Edit the second: Why do see "giving your body away" as so horrible that you'd rather die (putting aside things like prostitution in dire times)? I've seen you mention it elsewhere that you would rather die than have sex. The only reason so far you gave is that it might lead to a pregnancy, and if that doesn't happen, why is it so bad? Oh yeah, or you might be someone you'd feel the need to insult. Is being one of the "bad girls" such a traumatising experience for you? Why? People aren't so bad on the other side, and you wouldn't be a bad person if you went ahead and had sex.
“But I’m not a non-virgin, and I would have put myself in a position to be taken advantage of. Yes, it is entirely the attacker’s fault for the crime, but it is still our duty to keep ourselves aware, and not inhibit our senses and minds. One chooses to get drunk. One chooses to walk the night streets alone. One chooses to wear clothing (much as it is their choice) meant to display the body sexuality and in a public place. It is called responsibly and self-awareness. Indeed you can do all this and still end up victimized, but it far reduces your chances (after all, most rapes do happen by someone the person knows…you need to be careful with who you befriend too, such as I do). Who do you think someone is going to more likely to attack? – the sober person who is accompanied by someone else, or the drunk idiot stumbling around?”
I had no idea going home after working night-shift was an invitation to rape. And if dressing lightly is as well, you should go out and tell all the men who go around shirtless. Guess those guys are asking for it, huh? Maybe you too, after all what is seen as sexual or not is all in perspective. You’re not stuck at home, wearing a hijab, to Islamic extremists, that makes you a whore. Maybe you should start wearing a hijab to reduce your chances of getting raped, otherwise YOU’RE CHOOSING to get raped (and they are, at least here, the ones who do the raping most usually; Islamic extremists). If you want responsibility and self-awareness go out and join those extremist then and wear a hijab. Until then, you’re just as irresponsible, hypocritical, and asking for it as much as the rest of us.
“No, I am not seeing ‘rape’ at all. I know what rape is.”
An oxymoron then. If you don’t see that someone, whether they are virgin or not, is getting sexually abused as rape, then no, you don’t know what rape is.
“ In fact, rape used to be defined as the violation of a chaste woman. It’s good that, at least in most countries, it is gender neutral (though in the UK, the law basically stated that women could not rape until 2012), but now there is this extra crap to account for the looser morals action of modern people).”
It should be gender neutral. But the latter is not crap. Rape is rape. No means no.
“I have a soul. I’ve shown plenty of times the things I care about, the things I fight for, that I care for moral and political issues. I am not some heartless beast because of this one opinon people have a problem with. I’m a racist, a homophobe, a fascist, anti-Semitic, anti-atheist, and so on.”
You’re risking it though. Like you said, you don’t see a non-virgin woman getting sexually abused as rape. This is wrong.
“Yes, but it is not ‘bigotry’ to state that there is a biological difference between men and women.”
Biological difference is one thing. I could point out black people are biologically different (they do have more melamine for example) but to say black people can’t be raped based on this or anything else would be bigoted. What you are doing is bigotry.
“But you can’t get over all weaknesses, no matter how hard you try. Everyone has flaws. I know there are some flaws I can never get rid of, so I focus on what I do well, what I feel is and have been told is good about me. It’s better than me being miserable or angsting about how ‘useless’, or ‘worthless’ I am.”
This is true, but the right thing to do is try to improve yourself as best as you can. I’m not asking you to magically become someone who isn’t almost blind. I’m asking you to consider your mental perspective of things. This is not an impossible thing to do.
“They call those people names. It’s only fair, if immature, to return the behaviour. If you were being bullied, would you say it is stupid if someone says that you fighting back, doing the same thing, is bad? I’m not some little wimp or doormat. I give back what people send out.”
If that is what you want. It is sinking to their level though.
“Fair enough, it’s what I do as well, I would think.”
I try to do the right thing.
“Again, it’s the attitudes as I’ve said. People are free to whatever they want in their lives, but something that is choice can and will be judged. I am judged for my hobbies.”
Those people are idiots though. I don’t like FMA or whatever you’re into, but I’m not going to go on about that.
“No, no, that is a point. Yes, one would feel liberated, but surely you get annoyed at those who are all “I’m gay and proud, bitches!”. A better attitude would to just be happy that is no longer hated by most of the world, and don’t make a big deal out of it unless there was homophobia. I only say about myself being asexual/biromantic on topics related to sex. I would expect others to be annoyed if I waltzed around the streets proclaiming it to everyone I see.”
Umm, you kind of did that on a lot of places online already.
“I mentioned the contraceptives. It is when a woman who claims her ‘jilling off’ (heh, I see what you did there) claims they are still a virgin, or ‘liberated’ when it is a sexual activity.”
Technically it they're still a virgin, considering the current definition of a virgin.
“It’s still unacceptable.”
A small hit is nothing, yet you are upset about this while shrugging of a woman getting raped. You are a strange one.
Indeed. Everyone is free to think what will, but that does not stop some attitudes from having selfish/hypocritical connotations.
Then fair enough. They are not pretending to be what they are not. It’s not suprizing many do not identify as such, given the blatant misandry, double standards and the ‘any negative attitude towards women is sexist and misogynist, and everyone bad that happens to them is someone else’s fault’ that exists within it, and are the majority nowadays. That’s not to say the opposite side (the MRA/MRM) does not have it’s insane/idiotic, misogynistic members. Some even wholly believe that women were never oppressed in the first place, and that being denied the ability to vote did not count because plenty of men did not have it and they were ‘just handed it’. Moreover, they claim the inability to own homes, and land, or get a decent job were ‘provision and protection’ and that arranged marriage is ‘providing a woman with money and a house for life’. I once encountered one of those in person (well, as ‘in person’ as a comments section can be) when I pointed out the arranged wives are often raped, he came out with the typical quip of ‘yeah, because all men will rape any time they get the chance’.
Only Humanists/Equalists seem to have the most sane, calm members (I mean that, while the insane MRAs in the minority, they still most likely outnumber those in the latter titles).
Well, thanks (I mean about you not making a snarky comment). Well, if they are shamed for being a virgin, they have every right to complain, but if it is more the attitude of “Why don’t people want to have sex with me?!” or “I need to get laid or I’m a loser who fails at life!” (though that is more other people’s attitudes), then yeah, they should be shamed for that.
Yes it does. I’ve never done anything sexual. I haven’t done those things previously.
As for the edit, again, I haven’t done anything sexual, and there is nothing wrong with respecting one’s virginity (or being asexual – i.e. not being interesting in or having the desire to have sex, or lack of a sexual attraction to anyone). I’m just doing what is natural. Maybe if I had lust and did have sex, then I would be pompous and two faced for refusing this one man/these men out of the others I may have been with. Modern Feminism/Femifascism has led to women thinking they can do whatever they want and no one can say otherwise, even though that’s not how life works. As it is has been said more than a few times, women can’t have it both ways.
No. Marriage is giving one’s body to their partner. Both partners. Ok, if she was too tired, and her partner (male or female) went ahead and still did that, that would a be a very selfish action, but they are married, and she has been with them sexually before.
Marriage is a partnership. You love each other. You listen to each other. If she was a virgin and was not ready, that is rape regardless of the marriage. The same goes if the genders were reversed. Some countries still don’t seem to understand that marriage does not mean you must get it or the marriage is invalid. In England, refusing to consummate a marriage (from either gender) is grounds for divorce Do they not understand the kinds of actions that can lead too?
And when it is a man, she has been penetrated vaginally, so the hands or mouth are nothing compared to that.
No, that’s bullshit. Once more, rape is not simply rape anymore. We now have to include the idiots that put themselves at risk of some sick beast, and the hypocrites. Being drugged or threatened is not you putting yourself at in a vulnerable position. Especially when it is your family is being threatened. If someone waved around money and walked home on their own, surely they put themselves in a position to be mugged, even though the actual crime is the fault of the criminal? That is real life. Criminals will attack those who look like an easy target.
It is not ‘force’ because it was the other woman who fell for it like an idiot. Being mentally disabled would be different. She would not know any better. A woman with full control of her mind or even the slightest hint of intelligence would not fall for such a thing, regardless of whether she is a naturally gullible person or not. Once more, this is a way to excuse women of their responsibility as equal citizens and blame and shame men yet more.
As I said, it is not the taking of virginity when I think raping a virgin (again, there is little no difference between a virgin and non-virgin man unless he the bottom in homosexual intercourse, but unlike men and women, two men and two women can swap that dynamic easily) is disgusting, sick, other negative expressions, is because that non-sexual woman is having something sexual (yes, she most likely will be planning to sex at some point, but she has yet to do it), something she is not a part of, being forced upon her. Just as say, a vegetarian would feel violated if meat was forced upon then, or if a Muslin had alcohol forced upon them. Why is that so hard to understand?
Ok.
No, you read me wrongly. I know perfectly well about Gigolos. And the ignored fact that plenty of boys are forced in sex trafficking. I was just saying that not as many men resort to it when they are desperate. For women, it is seem as natural, and the best choice, but men? No, there are things they can do. It is only the stupid women who think that is only or best option.
I know, but that choosing to lose one’s virginity for pleasure means one is being a permanent sexual being. Again, it’s like saying you won't risk getting mugged if you wave around money, much as that is your choice and there is nothing harmful about it (unless you are less well-off and find it insulting, but that is not an excuse for violence).
I know that, but again, they took that risk, as we all take risk in everything we do. Sometimes you can’t see it coming, hence why they are accidents, but taking part in a activity you know can result a certain result, and then trying to excuse that result, calling it ‘unwanted’ and ‘accidental’, especially when that is another person’s life? Sick, insane, inhumane.
That’s what I’m trying to say. There is no harm in that case unless they possess those pompous, ‘feminist’ attitudes I keep mentioning. As for when it does, see above.
Yes. And unlike humans, at least the animal is asleep during it. I mean yes, we don’t remember our infancy, and there is the benefits, but it’s the thought, that these so very young boys have had a sharp object placed at their genitals. And in some female version, sometimes they don’t just cut off the labia/clitoris, they take away everything on the outside. And of course, ther is no sanitation or pain relief. Just recently I read that as well as the usual broken glass, sometimes fingernails are used. And of course, it has no heath benefits whatsoever, and, most likely because it is where they were raised, women still accept it as a necessary and normal part of their life.
Of course. But people are too lenient now. I know it is cruel thing to say, but mental conditions are not an excuse for ruining another person’s life. And imagine how their loved ones would feel, nothing that victim did not get justice.
No. I said numerous times why it is wrong. If murdering a child just born is murder, then murdering that life when it is still inside you is wrong as well. There is no ‘measure’ of life. Life is life, until they forfeit it by (again) destroying the life one of someone or some being else. So it is ‘irritating’ to care for all innocent life equality, to want true equality, to want to give everyone a chance regardless of their situation, to not have willing fathers ignored and belittled? Well, at least, unlike most pro-choicers (the choice, once more, was to have sex), you did not stereotype me as being some bible-thumping loon. And even if someone opposes it on religious grounds, I feel there is nothing wrong with that either. People are entitled to their beliefs. I even say the same for homophobes, and the arsehole brand of atheism, as plenty of people will share their beliefs about them The extreme ones need to be ignored.
Yup.
I said it before. Because of the way women and men work, etc, etc.
I’m just saying I’m resigned to that.
Again, that is good. They feel the way they feel and have a right to it.
Yes, I know, but yes, just like you, I’ve never been in a sexual relationship, so perhaps, I guess I can it put like…well, Matt and I always have and always had such long, interesting or strange conversations, and if that suddenly stopped or never happened, I would feel like the relationship is not working out, and we could end up drifting apart, so one may feel that, if the sex is missing, it is not a full relationship. While that is still very shallow, it has the same reasoning behind it, I would think.
Yes, but the difference is, she did not for completely natural reasons. She did not show any selfishness or think she was better because of it, because, as you said, it’s still sex, even though it was the pregnancy she desired. Besides, even though I wasn’t (much as mum wanted it to be that way), any child born the natural way has touched their mum’s vagina.
As it is someone else’s. You don’t know where they’ve been, what they’ve done. Would you drink from a straw someone else had used?
Well, actually, that is what I say too. So long as one had a good house over there head and food in their belly, or food to spare, I think we should be happy. Of course, though, humans are more complicated than that.
And? Their choice.
Because I myself am uncomfortable with the idea. And even if you are comfortable with, are a very sexual, as the penetrated party, it is that no matter what. She is ‘giving herself’ to another. Even if those two break up or it is one night stand, that person still has that. A woman is not ‘free’ of that person simply because she stopped sleeping with them, virgin when she started or not. They still have the fact that she gave herself to them, that she did have sex with them.
It is not ‘traumatizing’. I’m simply happy I’m not part of that group. As it natural for an asexual (though there are other forms), I am uncomfortable with the idea of sex, or sexual activity. I don’t need to ‘try it’ in order to know that I don’t like it.
I am not saying it is a ‘bad’ thing, but that that is just the way it works.
I did not say it was an ‘invitation’. I said it is putting oneself at risk. And if you are alone, one has to be weary. I’m not one of those people who are all “It’ll never happen me!” people.
And there is a difference between dressing lightly, and mini skirt or low cut top/boob tube, and then having the cheek to complain when someone else admires (not ‘objectifies’, as you are a person, a sexual person not a character on a screen) your body. Even in school, even when their skirts were unbelievably tiny, they still wore tights and kept it relatively modest. And if someone is so ‘proud of their body’, they have even less right to complain, especially when it is just words, or a look. I knew you would mention shirtless men. Nudity itself is sexual, however it is the way the nudity is framed or displayed. For example, if said hypothetical man had on a gimp mask and leech.
I’m not immune from judgement upon my hobbies/clothing, either, remember? However, with me always wearing decent clothes and being a virgin, I have a right to complain about such a thing as I am not a part of that group.
Yes, and that is a terrible attitude. They take modestly way, way too far, and act if as a woman cannot have any fun outside the home or she is putting herself at risk. My (and the reasoning most so called ‘victim-blamers’, such as that police officer who sparked the SlutWalk horseshite), is valid is not doing any harm, as they are words on someone’s choice, views make sense instead of being oppressive.
No, it’s an oxymoron (yes, I know what that is) to say that a sexual woman is getting ‘assaulted’ when she has nothing to lose.
Of course. No means no when it actually is no, and not some two-faced missy kidding on she has better standards.
I don’t care if others think it is wrong. They take that over all of my other beliefs, making it out that that is all I am. I have other subjects in my life, other pursuits. They are putting me in a box as much as I am to them.
No, it’s not, because being black is not a choice. Having sex is.
I do, but I just can’t see it any other way in regards to that topic. Even the cake analogy much as I understood it (that just because someone enjoys doing something, it does not make it okay for another person to make them do it), however, again, that is not sex, that is an irreversible choice. Just because I’m not some sheep to bows down to misandric, hypocritical Femifascists does not make a bad person.
I know it is. But even when I try to be nice, it still does not work. I tried to be nice to my bullies too, and they still punched and kicked, and insulted and stole my inhaler and magnifier.
I am trying to do so too. But again, it’s hard when people are screaming at you. Again, I enjoy having a nice, calm debate as much as I would fawning over a mutual interest with someone. The former simply gets me thinking more. I do like to see what the other sides say, but not when they are screaming and shouting and insulting and whatnot.
Again, once sexual topics, especially when it someone saying how great they are for being sexual.
Sexually activity is sexual activity. Hardly anyone believes in the ‘technical virgin’ anyone. For example, say someone gives a blowjob, they would most likely be laughed at if they still claimed virginity.
Well, if it really was small, then ok. Even if you pissed someone off, that’s still not an excuse. No, I am not ‘shrugging off’ ‘rape’, I care about actual issues and not some lady who kids on she’s better than other non-virgins.