Comment on The devil, the Angels and the flowerbed by NotenSMSK
Nice! I love all the jingles and tinkles. I like the gentle change in emotion by the end. It makes me feel hopeful. Would be a good one to read when depression starts to get the better of me and I'm looking for that light at the end of the tunnel. ^_^
I know little about formatting. I generally don't like it because I tend to find it distracting and unnecessary. Not here specifically, just in general. Like I am aware more of the physical presence of the letters/words than the emotions behind them. That's just one little person's opinion though!
I know little about formatting. I generally don't like it because I tend to find it distracting and unnecessary. Not here specifically, just in general. Like I am aware more of the physical presence of the letters/words than the emotions behind them. That's just one little person's opinion though!
Than you for your opinion and time 
I hope that hopefull bells with tinkle when you are down 
I personally don't like fomatting as well. But it was for a contest so had to... I am glad you liked it otherwise 
I hope that hopefull bells with tinkle when you are down I personally don't like fomatting as well. But it was for a contest so had to... I am glad you liked it otherwise Ah I see!
You're welcome! Aww I hope they tinkle too! That's so cute.
You're welcome! Aww I hope they tinkle too! That's so cute.
Hehe 
oh... I just added a last stanza... does it look better that way 
oh... I just added a last stanza... does it look better that way Hmmm. I don't know. I think I preferred it the other way. Maybe it's because I liked the last line.
Actually! Oh! I think if you swapped the last two paragraphs around (or whatever they are called) it would work well. But that's just me. I think it works with the last line feeling gentle and sweet, rather than bold and triumphant. Like finally she can feel peaceful. Like, all this torment and fighting, then, yeah! Go away devil!... Now gently, gently stepping forward.
Sorry if I suck at explaining it. Haha!
Actually! Oh! I think if you swapped the last two paragraphs around (or whatever they are called) it would work well. But that's just me. I think it works with the last line feeling gentle and sweet, rather than bold and triumphant. Like finally she can feel peaceful. Like, all this torment and fighting, then, yeah! Go away devil!... Now gently, gently stepping forward.
Sorry if I suck at explaining it. Haha!
hmmm... another person has also asked me about swapping the last two stanza's. I guess I will look into it then Thank you so... I did change the last line of the second last stanza as well. I should still swap them?
Thank you so... I did change the last line of the second last stanza as well. I should still swap them?You're welcome ^_^.
Which two lines were you talking about exactly? There's a lot of swapping going on. Haha!
Which two lines were you talking about exactly? There's a lot of swapping going on. Haha!
THe last line which is now "as blooms sprouted anew from the withered flowerbed"... actually I do feel like exchanging them too
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