well, dang. that was a bit lengthy, and please check your spelling. People tend to take things as seriously when they know a word is spelled incorrectly.
A few tips would to be actually cut the pact-history shorter, because some details are familiar and some are a bit repetitive: a lot of war and weapons of mass destruction. The simpler something is, the easier it is to understand.
I do not think the dinosaurs should also be psychic. They already have super-science to change their genetic material and are literally playing with the code-book of life (DNA), so if they can affect/read other's mind, they are becoming too much like the immortal gods they hate so much. The dinosaurs already have the nearly god-like powers, so I think they should keep something moral like trying to understand another life by hard work.
The celestial-kind confuses me a bit, because they are scared of humans technically, but the celestial-girl protected one so.. . (Side Note: keep something in the design between the Netherworld and Celestial the same would be good, shows opposing sides came from the same seed)I did not like the idea that dinosaurs made humans. I think a better alternative would be the dinosaurs were working on a project to take away magic for the immortals, which rearranged how magic worked in the final aftermath and let Darwin's theory of evolution takes it course to make human. It makes human a bit more scary because they are born without intent or any interfere, so are more free than the mortal before with power in them as well.
A few tips would to be actually cut the pact-history shorter, because some details are familiar and some are a bit repetitive: a lot of war and weapons of mass destruction. The simpler something is, the easier it is to understand.
I do not think the dinosaurs should also be psychic. They already have super-science to change their genetic material and are literally playing with the code-book of life (DNA), so if they can affect/read other's mind, they are becoming too much like the immortal gods they hate so much. The dinosaurs already have the nearly god-like powers, so I think they should keep something moral like trying to understand another life by hard work.
The celestial-kind confuses me a bit, because they are scared of humans technically, but the celestial-girl protected one so.. . (Side Note: keep something in the design between the Netherworld and Celestial the same would be good, shows opposing sides came from the same seed)I did not like the idea that dinosaurs made humans. I think a better alternative would be the dinosaurs were working on a project to take away magic for the immortals, which rearranged how magic worked in the final aftermath and let Darwin's theory of evolution takes it course to make human. It makes human a bit more scary because they are born without intent or any interfere, so are more free than the mortal before with power in them as well.
ill have to find an online spell checker if the automatic one isn't doing a good enough job : /
and also i just sat down and wrote that for like 45 mins so just a first draft, everything can change and the stuff in the episode guide will change to reflect it
i tried to section it off into segments so that they could be like books you find throughout the lvls, kinda collectible easter eggs to tell u the story instead of an info dumb at the beginning of a game. So since you didn't find them all at once i repeated things so they could each be read independently when i could
I probably wont use psychic powers, its just weird thinking about a t-rex using technology with its stubby arms, may have it so that they actually use giant robot arms and they purposefully modified their arms to be smaller so they could fit into a small socket to control the robot appendages.
i wasn't really trying to make the dinosaurs moral, when i was writing it i was thinking they were pretty ruthless. if u got x-com recently then they are more like the aliens than the humans
as for the celestial girl, i can have it so even though they r immortal they still have kids every few hundred years, and she was just born after the dinosaur uprising so doesn't have the same fear of mortals. ill change up the episodes so they aren't so much angel and demon, she liked the guy because of his personality traits, so she saved the woman for hers.
all of the immortals are actually going to be 3d models so you can visually tell them apart, otherwise they are just mimicking old legends. i was thinking instead of an angel she look like a young harpy, some of the background angels and demons may also look similarly
i'm kind of attached to the dinosaurs creating the original humans, but the current day humans wont have any recollection. as far as they know the dinosaurs were an unintelligent species that got wiped out by a meteor just like what we think today, may go in and state specifically that some of the Armageddon magic was going to wipe all the technology out so no trace was left. Adam and eve were actually still in their vats when the meteor hit, was going to have it so their magic protected them and they just woke up the next day alone in a garden of eden like place. the fact that they have latent ability explains why you never meet dogs or cats in the game that use magic, so going to keep that they were created to wield it.
ill have to flush it out a bit more and think more on ur suggestions, thanks again for your help!
and also i just sat down and wrote that for like 45 mins so just a first draft, everything can change and the stuff in the episode guide will change to reflect it
i tried to section it off into segments so that they could be like books you find throughout the lvls, kinda collectible easter eggs to tell u the story instead of an info dumb at the beginning of a game. So since you didn't find them all at once i repeated things so they could each be read independently when i could
I probably wont use psychic powers, its just weird thinking about a t-rex using technology with its stubby arms, may have it so that they actually use giant robot arms and they purposefully modified their arms to be smaller so they could fit into a small socket to control the robot appendages.
i wasn't really trying to make the dinosaurs moral, when i was writing it i was thinking they were pretty ruthless. if u got x-com recently then they are more like the aliens than the humans
as for the celestial girl, i can have it so even though they r immortal they still have kids every few hundred years, and she was just born after the dinosaur uprising so doesn't have the same fear of mortals. ill change up the episodes so they aren't so much angel and demon, she liked the guy because of his personality traits, so she saved the woman for hers.
all of the immortals are actually going to be 3d models so you can visually tell them apart, otherwise they are just mimicking old legends. i was thinking instead of an angel she look like a young harpy, some of the background angels and demons may also look similarly
i'm kind of attached to the dinosaurs creating the original humans, but the current day humans wont have any recollection. as far as they know the dinosaurs were an unintelligent species that got wiped out by a meteor just like what we think today, may go in and state specifically that some of the Armageddon magic was going to wipe all the technology out so no trace was left. Adam and eve were actually still in their vats when the meteor hit, was going to have it so their magic protected them and they just woke up the next day alone in a garden of eden like place. the fact that they have latent ability explains why you never meet dogs or cats in the game that use magic, so going to keep that they were created to wield it.
ill have to flush it out a bit more and think more on ur suggestions, thanks again for your help!
Well, I was mostly referring to the misspelled 'game; in you comment about three rows above this comment box and that you spelled 'prophet' as 'profit' in pact-history. You should read your work before you finish because some grammar/spelling mistakes the computer won't catch.
Well here are some other questions/things to consider for the pact-history:
1) What is magic in your world because it seems to be also be the human soul, so what about human and immortals are similar. What makes the power only just potential for humans--perhaps they do not understand what it is exactly like the idea of soul or death? Why do souls pass through different dimensions when a person dies? where does the magic comes from.
2)Is the complete pact-history a common-known among the demons and celestial-kind? Is what the demon and/or celestial-kind know about the pact-history actually true--because remember the truth get twisted and changed sometimes by who is telling it. If the true pact history is not known, how are the player to discover it? Perhaps by some secret notes by Boggle before he . . . well, actually I don't remember where he went in the end. Is the pact-history a side-quest or a part-of-the-main-quest for the players?
Well here are some other questions/things to consider for the pact-history:
1) What is magic in your world because it seems to be also be the human soul, so what about human and immortals are similar. What makes the power only just potential for humans--perhaps they do not understand what it is exactly like the idea of soul or death? Why do souls pass through different dimensions when a person dies? where does the magic comes from.
2)Is the complete pact-history a common-known among the demons and celestial-kind? Is what the demon and/or celestial-kind know about the pact-history actually true--because remember the truth get twisted and changed sometimes by who is telling it. If the true pact history is not known, how are the player to discover it? Perhaps by some secret notes by Boggle before he . . . well, actually I don't remember where he went in the end. Is the pact-history a side-quest or a part-of-the-main-quest for the players?
the soul is results in how the humans were made. The dinosaurs created them with this natural affinity and mana production that normal creatures dont have, when they die there is no procedure for that energy to escape so it gathers in the chest and congeals into a a glob of pure magical energy(humans dont have a means of detecting it yet). Its not going to be based on traditional religion souls that we really have today.
im going to have it so the celestians go by angels and netherworlders go by demons just because thats what the humans have attached names to them by what little sightings they have. gona get confusing if i dont state that somewhere since im now making this its own story plot not just based on real religious mythos.
many of the older immortals were actually there for the war with the dinosaurs, but the angels do have children occasionally so 1-2 generations may have passed since the planes were created. The mutations the demons went through have increased their labedo, so even though some now die of age and some dont, they have had a few hundred generations since then. so angels are still kind of weary, demons have had a societal shift and now care more about amassing personal power for better standing in their community so want to farm souls and dont care about consequences.
as for how the player finds out, in the first few games ill have collectible books that you can read one of the sections from, in the later games i may throw them in as loading screen flavor so those who didnt bother reading can find out.
also i was thinking for season 2 its about 50 years in the future and you play as the angel girl. she gets infected by a demon and becomes a fallen angel, and one of the quests is Kanaloa sending her to find boogles skull, so hes going to be dead.
OR(just thought of this) cobowin is given boogles skull by kanaloa in ep 1 and it has boogles power infused into it. By using the skull you get glimpses of the future of what you should be doing (aka a hint system for the puzzle solving!) and it can occasionally provide these little snippets of the past(probably going to use this one now that i thought of it and every point and click needs a hint system)
im going to have it so the celestians go by angels and netherworlders go by demons just because thats what the humans have attached names to them by what little sightings they have. gona get confusing if i dont state that somewhere since im now making this its own story plot not just based on real religious mythos.
many of the older immortals were actually there for the war with the dinosaurs, but the angels do have children occasionally so 1-2 generations may have passed since the planes were created. The mutations the demons went through have increased their labedo, so even though some now die of age and some dont, they have had a few hundred generations since then. so angels are still kind of weary, demons have had a societal shift and now care more about amassing personal power for better standing in their community so want to farm souls and dont care about consequences.
as for how the player finds out, in the first few games ill have collectible books that you can read one of the sections from, in the later games i may throw them in as loading screen flavor so those who didnt bother reading can find out.
also i was thinking for season 2 its about 50 years in the future and you play as the angel girl. she gets infected by a demon and becomes a fallen angel, and one of the quests is Kanaloa sending her to find boogles skull, so hes going to be dead.
OR(just thought of this) cobowin is given boogles skull by kanaloa in ep 1 and it has boogles power infused into it. By using the skull you get glimpses of the future of what you should be doing (aka a hint system for the puzzle solving!) and it can occasionally provide these little snippets of the past(probably going to use this one now that i thought of it and every point and click needs a hint system)
what's mana in terms/relationship to magic? Do the immortals have the ability to produce mana as well, or perhaps is that a trait lost due to constant mutation? As for the souls goes, I'm still a bit confused: does the blob of energy (which I assume is the soul)only form when a person is alive or dead, because the explanation seems to be the hint that the soul forms when a person dies.Another thing is that if the humans have no means of detecting the soul, how did the idea of the soul come to being, what is actually the soul then if is not the idea it is normally understood to be? It's obviously very unfair to the humans because they do not what they are trading away, then.
You see, there's a lot of things that made-up the world so depending how far you want to change or introduce a new structure into being, it might take more time than you think, the bigger scale and usually more serious it is, and your world seems quite serious with a logical play. I advise you take some more time to develop your world/story before you comment quite fast back.
PS: the boogle-skull idea has very good potential.
You see, there's a lot of things that made-up the world so depending how far you want to change or introduce a new structure into being, it might take more time than you think, the bigger scale and usually more serious it is, and your world seems quite serious with a logical play. I advise you take some more time to develop your world/story before you comment quite fast back.
PS: the boogle-skull idea has very good potential.
mana is just the actual name of the energy used to cast magic, I use it as the general term like in an rpg, probably wont have any special explanation of it or anything since I don't know if i will use an actual mana bar to limit how many spells are usable in a puzzle at this point. when an immortal dies since its body is so magical the mana just bursts out leaving no trace of the immortals existence(reason for no remains to be found unlike the dinosaurs). Since the humans dont have magical bodies the mana cant escape in an instant and gets compressed in the chest until it takes on a gelatinous consistency and oozes out as a soul(so yeah it only exists after they die). The demons named it a soul, and its implying that most early religions actually started from seeing the angels and demons fighting so they then took the word soul from that, while at the same time the netherworld immortals started calling themselves demons and referred to the celestials as angels kind derogatorily(the celestials will probably refer to themselves as celestial and refer to the demons as fallen cousins). I originally made the pact under the Jewish and christian kinds of demons and stuff that you would find in other games, but now im leaning twords new rules and mythos. The Pact will now refer to the deal that the demons can take a soul from a human who knows too much about their existence, mot of the humans dont know about this and think they summon the demons as personal servants because of how warlocks are depicted in pop culture these days. Right now only the old man in sloth and the warlock in greed are the only ones who know that summoning a real demon usually ends in the humans demise, the old man is dying son anyways and the warlock is tricking them.
im currently trying to get some modeling pumped out for the first episode, but i do plan to rework the story a lot since making the history. Other than the very basics of each episode Ill probably rewrite every one of them by the end of the month
also i made a group for this and forgot to send u an invite till now. if you join u can get updates about the progress and since you've been so helpful you will get alpha access if you want.
im currently trying to get some modeling pumped out for the first episode, but i do plan to rework the story a lot since making the history. Other than the very basics of each episode Ill probably rewrite every one of them by the end of the month
also i made a group for this and forgot to send u an invite till now. if you join u can get updates about the progress and since you've been so helpful you will get alpha access if you want.