The fact it was written for children is also why it's a little off putting that the book handled so much violence and morality issues. The only thing missing was sexual tension, which is the one thing I want to do differently in my writing. It was the one place where her teenagers weren't acting like teenagers.
There were Ghostwriters eh? That explains a lot. Yeah, I really got that vibe too, and a lot of the plans really seemed to have serious logical inconsistencies any of the characters could have pointed out. I don't remember exactly if there was a reason Tobias needed to be with the rest of the group, but he should have been sent with Rachel.
Sure the group had a lot of lucky breaks before then, but never did they come to rely upon them, and it was a pretty definite suicide mission to send Rachel alone into battle against several powerful morph capable military officers. I'm surprised Tobias didn't show a more pronounced inaversion to killing, considering he had entered the natural predator prey cycle and would have had a very strong pressure to understand that killing is necessary. It also would have made the romance between Tobias and Rachel have a bit stronger of a connection, and another part of how they could have felt more like outsiders.
For that matter pretty much everyone of those characters was pretty okay with killing for some amount of time. Even Cassie, the bleeding heart, often accepted killing and rationalized it herself. Quite graphically we went into the details of the numbers of hork-bajir, taxxon and human controllers they wiped through violently killing and maiming. Maybe I should go back through and see if I can make an accurate kill count.
While I understand that they were trying to show how shook up over the loss of his family he was, the jump in character was just entirely too drastic, especially in light of how well most of the other characters ended up having to deal with horrifying life experiences.
I've got a plan to rewrite the ending to be more logical in outcome, more true to the series, but I keep hitting dilemmas. My first idea was have Crayak involved, telling Jake he could save his family if there was a sacrifice/exchange, and thinking it meant him accept it, but instead it be Cassie because she's the one who screwed up the timeline the last time Crayak tried to do that for Jake, but the same problem appeared, and so it wouldn't work. Even if she got killed she'd just pop back up again because that wasn't supposed to have happened.
I'm trying to decide how much of the details are salvageable, and how to bring the characters back in-character while keeping some of the same plot lines.
Perhaps it should be a collaborative effort with other fans. I need to reread the entire series from beginning to end again taking notes, making outlines, searching for themes and strong character points and other various details before going into the effort for even rough drafts. And of course all of the side books (thank god it's all online, at least for now, the downside of the reboot is they might take the site down)