Comment on Ora Pro Nobis by tragiccomedy
Hmm. The piece is very well constructed--I especially like the little details at the beginning, like the umbrella--but seems to be missing something for me. Perhaps it's because LBGT stories are more popular than ever before, both in my old writing classes and in popular literature, and the "accidental outing" plotline is a staple.
I'd almost like to see what comes after the final prayer--the way that someone could mentally reconcile traditional Catholicism with a lifestyle that is most certainly not is intriguing.
I'd almost like to see what comes after the final prayer--the way that someone could mentally reconcile traditional Catholicism with a lifestyle that is most certainly not is intriguing.
Hahaha hey, I had a page limit and I filled it up. I feel like it's a bit lacking, as well, but I didn't want to spill over and lose points, you know?
I would like to point out that Katie isn't accidentally outed; her brother acknowledges during their conversation that he's known for a while about her sexual orientation, he's just never been a witness to it. I know that LGBT stories are pretty popular in this day and age, with the whole Gay Rights movement going on, but for me it's just the idea of slipping into a different skin. I'm a straight Pagan; Katie's an Irish-Catholic lesbian. Very big difference there, and something that I enjoyed trying to understand.
Katie and her family have some fabulous issues; the first story I wrote that was a sort of first draft of this one, but was set much later on, addressed a lot of them, but it was taking too much on at once. I might like to try and stretch her and her family into something more lengthy, but it would take quite a bit of time and planning, I suppose.
Your critique, once again, is welcomed and delightful.
I would like to point out that Katie isn't accidentally outed; her brother acknowledges during their conversation that he's known for a while about her sexual orientation, he's just never been a witness to it. I know that LGBT stories are pretty popular in this day and age, with the whole Gay Rights movement going on, but for me it's just the idea of slipping into a different skin. I'm a straight Pagan; Katie's an Irish-Catholic lesbian. Very big difference there, and something that I enjoyed trying to understand.
Katie and her family have some fabulous issues; the first story I wrote that was a sort of first draft of this one, but was set much later on, addressed a lot of them, but it was taking too much on at once. I might like to try and stretch her and her family into something more lengthy, but it would take quite a bit of time and planning, I suppose.
Your critique, once again, is welcomed and delightful.