What you just described isn't what demisexuality is.. but may be what any person thinks of it on first impression. News flash: It's not.
I'm demisexual. This is not because I want to wait on being intimate with someone, like any other sexuality being demi is
not a choice. Demisexuals are on the ace spectrum. Demi's literally
don't feel any initial attraction to anyone. Unlike an asexual, demisexuals do however have the
ability to become sexually attracted to someone after
developing a deep emotional bond to them. This bond to me is not based on gender, but the bond alone to that one individual person. We develop sexual feelings only after becoming close to someone. A demiseuxal does not find just anyone attractive of any gender, they are practically asexual before bonding to someone.
We. feel. no. initial. attraction. That's it. That's our sexuality.
A lot of people don't understand it. A lot of people never will. Even those who try to understand it don't quite get it. Things that are normal to a non-demi are things that a demi doesn't or can't understand either. I'll never comprehend cheating or talking about how attractive someone is, or having a crush. These are things a demisexual generally does not experience that others experience as normal. If my friend showed me pictures of "attractive" men or woman and asked which I found attractive, I'd say neither. I never find anyone attractive, I don't have an interest or desire in it. But fast forward to
after getting to know my girlfriend, I now feel attracted to her, but no one else.
Ever. When I first began dating her though? I thought I was asexual. I used to think I may have been aromantic too. I didn't develop feelings until months after, not until we bonded. I realized then that I was demi.
This article explains it pretty well for the curious:
demisexuality.org/articles/wha…If you don't agree with it fine, but please don't come into a demisexual space to tell us you don't think we're real, that's quite a dick move on your part and does not make you look intelligent. I don't see why you feel the need to assert your opinion here if not just to boast your ill acquitted ego. Your opinion doesn't matter. We exist. We always will.
-A demiromantic/demisexual