Oh no, don't be sorry haha 
I imagine the spots are pricey, but it might be worth it for me to go to one sometime, see what people say and how things look, and figure out if it'd be good for me the next year or something. I'll have to see if there's anything around me that I can go to just to check it out.
Hahaha that sounds like a rad mirror, and your grandma sounds adorable - not even mad, just resigned to the fact that you like the weird spooky stuff, that's great 
Oh man yeah I've tried a ton of ribs at those things and sometimes it IS an art to get really good ones. Just cook at a low temp forever and cut the slices BIG (I like when they'd basically cut the edge of one rib to the edge of the third rib over, so you have double the meat on each rib that they actually give you). Other than that, the differences are 'did they get good meat', 'what sauce is on it', and 'what *other* stuff is cooked with/underneath it' - and those can all change everything. Crazy! I get the idea, but I don't know enough to make the crazy amazing ones, just 'decent' ones haha (I'm also not a great cook, so there's that too).
Yeah people definitely have the weirdest misconceptions about things; I love your stories though! It's great to shatter those perceptions haha
Thanks for finding me the link (I saw your other comment)! Oh man, yeah, licking the paintbrush can be bad for lots of different paints; I can just imagine O.O
Thanks for the crazy long comment! I know I'm slow to respond but I love the stories